Oh holy fuck I need to move house immediately. And change my name and possibly have facial surgery.

[EssieTregowan]

We live in a detached house. There is a small row of terraced 'starter' houses opposite (this is relevant).

I can back from the school run to find a hand delivered card on the mat to 'Rebecca'. Rebecca lives opposite in one of the terraces, but I couldn't remember which one.

Anyway, I've just seen her pull in so I dashed out the front to hand it to her. She apologised for the inconvenience and I laughed and said 'no worries, who ever it was obviously thought you were better off than you are!'

What the actual fuck is wrong with me?

I just went all shivery as soon as I said it and turned round and ran indoors. Oh my god what must she think of me?

I have often crippling social anxiety and often blurt out stuff without thinking but this has to be my worst ever.

Kill me now. It would be a kindness.

Tell her you are so sorry and you have tourettes syndrome. It's the only way.

not all of us have the insight to recognise when we might have hurt someone's feelings, or the gumption to apologise straight away

Spot on, scampi We've all said daft things sometimes, but if that was me I'd rather at least try to make up for it, than just leave someone to think I was a twat (however justifiably )

Unintentional slip up? As in the OP didn't mean to say it out loud? Because the thought was in her head, and I'm not sure how you can get round the situation with the neighbour now! An apology would probably help, but if I was the neighbour I would be in avoidance mode.

That's made my day

Could you possibly have Aspergers or be on the ASD spectrum? It could explain the social anxiety & saying things that you quickly realise wasn't appropriate.

I'm sure she didn't take offence.

Lordy, what's with all the 'drop in a note' suggestions?

Does anyone here really think the OP's genuinely awkward and apologetic tone, is going to come over in writing?

Just suck it up and give her a knock - sooner rather than later.

Yes, it's awkward but you'll feel so much better afterwards OP.

Don't forget to update us!!

I might go next door and call my neighbour a fucking cunt now just for the heck of it.

Oh dear OP. My jaw actually dropped open a bit at that!

If you said that to me I'd be upset and offended. If you apologised I'd totally get it though - you don't sound snobby, you sound nice.

Just apologise and explain (a bit) - a note is fine.

It doesn't matter about what neighbours think. Who cares if you were in dire straits they wouldn't help. I stopped a neighbours kid getting run over; because they were more concerned with having a shag than watching their 2 year old. Whi git out. Didn't even get a bottle of wine or nowt. So if I were you I would go out more and do stuff away from the home. Ps I bet your neighbours don't even know you or care bet they are too busy with their own problems.

This is exactly the kind of thing I'd say! I often speak then engage brain. Most recent was a get together with all the ladies on the street (new build estate so just getting to know each other) and we were talking about girl names (I'm pregnant) and I mentioned a name that DH suggested that I don't like and said something along those lines. One of the women has a girl with that name. And I knew that....

I've just full on cringed for you OP

Love the tourettes solution

I was on the receiving end of a brain fart. Not long moved into my new home and got chatting to a neighbour who has a ds similar age to mine. I was makking small talk and said something like how nice it was there were dc around and as they get older they can play out together (quiet cul de sac) and if she ever fancied getting together. She responded "Oh I don't have the luxury of sitting at home all day with my dc I have to work" For context I am a single mum on benefits and she isn't. I genuinely believe it was a brain fart because she looked mortified and literally ran home. Ever since she has been incredibly friendly though. It didn't make me feel bad for myself, I was more mortified for her especially as I am sure I have said equally twattish things without thinking

Yep. You need to move. Start packing.😄

Could you possibly have Aspergers or be on the ASD spectrum? It could explain the social anxiety & saying things that you quickly realise wasn't appropriate.

Or she could possibly be like millions of other people who simply has the odd, awkward foot in mouth moment.

I don't think I've met an adult who hasn't?

None as awkward as this one mind

Will you lot stop the hilarity at the Tourette's thing - not funny when you have to live with it and I doubt you'd discuss other disabilities like this (other than OCD, also apparently hilarious to some)

OP I think your note is the right thing to do and I hope she understands - most rude people don't apologise so it should be obvious that you are sincere.

There's foot in mouth and there's insulting someone's home and income. That's really shocking!

I think you really need to apologise for that one, and just explain you'd been thinking about home design shows or something. There's foot in mouth and being really offensive.

To Heatherbell
Oh, no....

Op - you sound nice and not a snob, you just said an inappropriate things, which can happen when you are anxious. It's the whole 'don't think of pink elephants' scenario.

Other posters - look I am not upright, I have a sense of humour. But please for the love of all things can we stop using Tourettes as a cover all rude/ inappropriate things/ hilarious condition. It's a terrible condition for someone to have, especially a child, and only 10% of tourettes sufferers shout out inappropriate things 'coprolalia'.
Sorry for the sense of humour failure but I find it important. No one would joke about having Down's syndrome and be crying with laughter about it, would they?!

Omg. I can't believe you said that!

I would take a bunch of flowers over and apologise. Bad enough to say it, worse still not to apologise. She probably felt humiliated.

Can you invite her over for tea and apologise profusely?

By tea I mean a cup off. Don't bother with the cucumber sandwiches or some Victorian Sponge. And give the butler the day off

Then call her a fucking cunt as per pp.

(hope you're ok op)

I might go next door and call my neighbour a fucking cunt now just for the heck of it.

Anyone else tentatively waiting for a knock on the door?

Every day Worra.

Don't be ridiculous she can't blame Tourettes or even joke about it

Go over and speak to her in person. You're going to have to see her again sometime, so it might as well be now. You can both have a laugh about your social anxiety and verbal diarrhoea and that will be the end of it. If you just put a note through you won't know how it's been taken and you will still be dreading seeing her again.

Come on. Over you go.

For all those thinking how 'hilarious' op is for telling her neighbour to her face she's basically poor, what if Rebecca was on here writing the thread about her rude neighbour demeaning her like that?!!! I think most of you would be on Rebecca's side.