..to prefer to be an expectant mother rather than a pregnant person?

[CatWithKittens]

The BMA has advised doctors not to refer to an expectant mother but to a pregnant person. Leaving aside the obvious question as to whether somebody who is trans-gender and pregnant is not also going to be a mother, do other people think I am being unduly sensitive when I say, that if either term has to be used, I would still prefer to be referred to as an expectant mother (if we get round to DC6)?

Surely this is just part of more general shift in society to use neutral language? It's not necessarily a deep implicit statement about trans politics!

If trans politics is taken out of the equation what other sources point to a lack of "neutrality" in the term mother ?

The chances are, though, that in medical records you are not likely to see "expectant mother" or "pregnant person". You are more likely to be referred to as Primigravida, multigravida etc.

I have 4 DC and I don't think I have ever been referred to by a doctor or midwife (in writing or verbally) as an expectant mother. So I think all this is a bit of a non-issue TBH. Others experiences may lead to differing opinions, however.

Thanks Cool, off to email them now and to remind them that its only women who can gestate so no need for the "pregnant person" unless the individual asks to be called that.

Considering what is going on in the world at the moment why the hell does this even matter? I wouldn't care what they call me and I think YABU.

YANBU. The world is going mad. All mothers are women.

I think staff should use language that patients are happy with. Most mothers would expect and I suspect be more comfortable being referred to as an expectant mother, or pregnant woman, than a pregnant person. I certainly would be. I don't care what language they use if they are looking after a Trans patient. I do care what language they would use for me.

Good point Nap. How are they to refer to 'expectant fathers'?

Truly I was (verbally) referred to as "Mum" "mum to be" "expectant mum" - it was all absolutely lovely and fluffy and nice and I felt like I was treated with dignity and respect.

Pregnant person would have made me feel like chattel and as if I didnt matter in the process. Which is the real end game here lets face it

If I am lucky enough to have a 3rd DC I will ensure that I am not referred to as a pregnant person/pregnant human/gestational carrier or whatever/menstruator, and any of the other absolutely smashing names we are called by those who would prefer it if we - biological women - are not around full stop.

Also if you are a surrogate or are going to have the baby adopted,medical staff would normally know that and the terms you are happy with will be discussed. Pregnant person is unlikely to be suitable.

This seems like the perfect example of political correctness gorn mad.

YANBU, when will this claptrap end?

Since when did inclusion mean to exclude women? W'ere inclusive, the term woman only relates to you if you have a penis, otherwise please refer to yourself as person, humanoid or non male.

Surrogate is short for surrogate mother!

YANBU, when will this claptrap end?

My feelings precisely.

Isn't this similar to how men must have felt having to be male police officers instead of policemen?

Political Correctness is about offending no body.

Do PPs really take offence at not being referred to as a woman in their notes? Enough to have yet another thread bitching about trans agenda taking away from women? Really?

Women who are surrogates, or who have their child adopted, often refer to themselves as biological mothers.
Calling yourself a pregnant person is only relevant to a tiny number of people. I am fine if their midwives call them that. But it is madness to change the language for the rest of us.

YANBU. There was an (unrelated, I realise) thread recently about co-workers being offended by the title of a book their colleague was reading in her break. One poster very sensibly said something to the effect of "Since when are we actually not allowed to offend people?" All sorts of people are offended by all sorts of things. It is not society's job (and is impossible anyway) to edit reality in order to remove every possible source of offense to anyone. Being offended once in a while won't actually kill you. Women give birth, men don't. Be offended by that if you like, but don't expect people to lie and say it's not the truth.

Isn't this similar to how men must have felt having to be male police officers instead of policemen?

No. It is in fact perfectly possible for a woman to be a police officer.

I feel as though terms used should be person centred I.e,
Trans - pregnant person
Someone planning to adopt - pregnant person
Women planning on keeping said child - expectant mother
I suppose it boils down to whether the 'pregnant person' plans to actually be a 'mother' to what term should be used.
But no - YANBU - I would feel the same

YANBU! Madness ...

"I don't care what language they use if they are looking after a Trans patient. I do care what language they would use for me."

Completely agree. My female body grew and birthed children. I would prefer to be referred to as a woman.

I can't support the notion that a transman is in fact male, but pregnant transmen should be called whatever they prefer too.

I can't imagine this will impact how individuals are referred to, rather it is a term that is more likely to be used to referred to as a collective term for people who are pregnant.

Given I am frequently asked about "my husband" by midwives etc I think there is a long way to go before large chunks of the NHS catch up with even very established changes in society (like the fact a significant proportion of pregnant women aren't married), never mind this.

I've just heard the interview on WH. The first part of the BMA guidance about not assuming parents are mothers is actually really important. DH used to get really frustrated when he took any of our DC to anything connected to their health, and the first thing he was asked was where's Mum. Every bloody time.

If we want equality for women, then Fathers need to treated like parents too.

I'm afraid they lost me at pregnant people though. Especially with they explanation that many people who are pregnant identify as Women. You don't say