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Original poster

To wonder why some people are in denial about their weight?

688 replies

penciltop · 21/01/2017 08:48

Not criticising anyone here but just wondering.

I had a morbidly obese friend who says she is that size because she is muscular and has 'big bones'. I don't comment but she clearly has a lot of fat on her body and she does overeat.

I have come across other people too who say people are healthier these days so are going to be bigger. People say it is because of genetics. Everyone is overweight in their family and that is the reason they are.

I know weight loss isn't easy - trying to lose weight myself! - but surely pretending it is because of reasons outside of your control isn't going to help. People keep telling me I am fine and I don't need to lose weight. Err yes I do according to BMI. I am in the overweight category

Not denying the reasons for people who have real medical reasons such as disabilities or because of medication

OP posts:
formerbabe · 24/01/2017 15:00

I'm not asking you for weight loss tips. I'm not obese. I'm overweight but relatively unbothered by that fact. I eat dinner with my dh, have the odd treat and go to the gym. I'm not interested in starving myself like I used to. I'm not making excuses for me weight because I feel no need to justify myself. I'm talking about obesity in general, societal terms.

TheAtheist · 24/01/2017 15:04

But that's about the number of calories I eat on a normal day. It's a perfectly ok number of calories.

You just need to 'spend' them wisely

FarAwayHills · 24/01/2017 15:06

There was a thread yesterday where a mum was seeking advice about her teen DD who is overweight. Some PPs slated her saying she was fat shaming her DD and should leave her be when she was clearly a concerned Mun and treading very carefully with her DD. So parents of overweight kids should just ignore a major health issue for fear of hurting their childs feelings. What about their feelings when they are laughed at during PE or when they cannot buy clothes like their friends wear? What about their health?

Seriously being overweight is a major health issue and people need to stop making excuses like puppy fat, big bones, genes etc. Most people are overweight because they eat to much and move too little.

Basicbrown · 24/01/2017 15:07

But the point is athiest I'm not overweight....!

formerbabe · 24/01/2017 15:08

Most people are overweight because they eat to much and move too little

Correct. Except they eat too much for them and exercise too little for them. What do you think controls the for them part?!

OohNoDooEy · 24/01/2017 15:12

I think we've completely lost sight of a normal weight. Most women in my office are overweight, myself included. Most women in my office look a little overweight but I hear the conversation about BMI not being accurate SO often.

BMI is inaccurate if you're an athlete or the exception to the rule but most aren't an exception. If you're overweight you eat too much/don't move enough. For most, a BMI of around 22 is spot on.

Original poster
penciltop · 24/01/2017 15:22

For me, the more I eat the more I want to eat

If I have long gaps between eating it doesn't stimulate my appetite in the same way.

I had no breakfast today, had soup and a roll at lunch and have resisted all the chocolate at the office

OP posts:
ppeatfruit · 24/01/2017 15:25

This discussion is also forgetting about the addiction that some foods cause, it's not so easy to fight it in a society that peddles rubbish foods ALL the time. Almost all snack foods\cafes etc are plugged with sugar and wheat filled foods (witness the rise of the heavily iced effing cupcake) . It NOT easy to resist all the crap.

sotiredbutworthit · 24/01/2017 15:28

5'3" and weigh 95kg. I'm fat. I have a thyroid problem but that's not why I'm fat. It's because I eat too much crap and don't do enough exercise!! It's not genetic or hormonal and I'm not "big boned"! I also know that it's not healthy. I'm more at risk of various disease. To pretend otherwise is foolish. People need to be honest with themselves. I am actively trying to lose weight - for myself.

Joyy · 24/01/2017 15:32

I used to weigh 17stone, now I weigh 10 (5ft 2, size22+ to size10). When I look in the mirror I see virtually the same person, same width (I swear), same bits poke out in the wrong places, same bits stand out as being nice. I don't have body dysmorphia, it's just how people perceive themselves. I knew I was fat, new the scales said huge, bit still didn't see myself as different.

Stormtreader · 24/01/2017 16:04

www.nytimes.com/2012/01/01/magazine/tara-parker-pope-fat-trap.html

A bit of science for everyone saying "you must be overeating if you're not losing weight".

imustbepatient · 24/01/2017 16:06

I sometimes pop onto these threads to recommend people read The Obesity Code by Dr Jason Fung. I'd be interested to hear what other people think of it, esp people with a background in nutritional biochemistry and related medical / research fields.

hoddtastic · 24/01/2017 16:09

nobody is denying that there are reasons for eating/over eating (i've just had a custard donut because i fancied it) Can I have a custard donut every day? No, should I have the wine I am planning to drink tonight? Probably not, if I do then I need to work out a way to make those calories vanish- by either moving more, or eating a lower calorie supper and not hitting the biscuits at the meeting I am going to this evening.

Food is a really hard one to crack, because back to birth you cry and want soothing, you are fed. You go to celebrate a birthday- you eat, You feel a bit pissed off - here's some chocolate,. You can't 'not eat' and if you have bad habits (they are not your fault mainly) relating to food and eating then the off switch can be faulty. It's not a personal criticism, food is relatively cheap and shit food is even cheaper and comes handily wrapped for you take everywhere with you. Retraining your body to eat better/smaller/less often the key, nobody has said it is easy, and nobody has criticised anyone on here.

FarAwayHills · 24/01/2017 16:36

It's also difficult to be disciplined because food is just everywhere now we can't seem go anywhere without it. Kids are constantly snacking in pushchairs and car seats. They cannot go a few minutes from the house without getting twitchy for a snack yet they are ferried about in cars and don't play outside so never burn it off. What sort of habit is this?

People walk around with giant coffees and frappe things containing half of their calories for the day. The habit of a few glasses of wine in the evenings can soon add up and then we wonder why we are putting on weight.

Gwenhwyfar · 24/01/2017 18:39

"Like I said, I exercise everyday but if I want to be slim, I have to eat very little...Like I said, one meal a day. Whereas others could eat more than be, but be slimmer than me."

I presume you've been to the doctor about this?

formerbabe · 24/01/2017 18:43

I presume you've been to the doctor about this?

I presume you didn't mean to be so rude.

Gwenhwyfar · 24/01/2017 18:45

"Some people put on weight more easily than others, that's just factual."

That kind of illness affects something like one in a thousand people.

" Even when I got weighed in hospital not long after having dd2 (and I was a big size 12/ small 14 at the time) I was still just about within the normal weight range for my height."

That's normal. Medium and even chubby people will be in the healthy weight range, the healthy weight range is for all non-overweight people, not just for thin people.

formerbabe · 24/01/2017 18:47

That kind of illness affects something like one in a thousand people

Really? What's the name of the illness?

Gwenhwyfar · 24/01/2017 18:50

"I presume you've been to the doctor about this?

I presume you didn't mean to be so rude."

You've been happy enough to comment extensively about this problem, so why not about the medical cause for it?

Basicbrown · 24/01/2017 18:53

What is your point Gwen? I don't think I put on weight easily and I am a slight build (hence the BMI stuff) - are you disputing that despite not even knowing me...?

formerbabe · 24/01/2017 18:55

You are being sarcastic and rude.

I don't know anything about my genetics.

I'm merely stating that the only time my weight has been in the normal bmi range was when I ate one meal a day. Why does that offend you so much?

Bonkerz · 24/01/2017 18:55

I'm morbidly obese. I'm not in denial. I am fully aware of my size. The difference I guess is that every day I get up and get busy with my kids and work and I don't care about my size. I can genuinely say I'm happy with who I am. I do have a health condition that has nothing to do with my size. Actually my doctors get worried if I lose weight! I have maintained my weight for over 3 years now (small loss a year ago which scared go and caused tests etc but all sorted now!!)

Gwenhwyfar · 24/01/2017 18:56

Formerbabe - I said that kind of illness. I wasn't referring to a specific one.

formerbabe · 24/01/2017 18:58

Formerbabe - I said that kind of illness. I wasn't referring to a specific one

Yet this mystery illness affects 1 in 1000 people you say? I do hope their doctors are able to give them a better diagnosis than you.

Gwenhwyfar · 24/01/2017 19:02

"What is your point Gwen? I don't think I put on weight easily and I am a slight build (hence the BMI stuff) - are you disputing that despite not even knowing me...?"

Eh? When did I dispute that you don't put on weight easily.
You said you were surprised to have a normal BMI when you were a size 12-14 and I said that was normal.