To think SAHM's have an easier life?

[workingmummy123]

I understand this won't please everyone but I'm referring to SAHMs with school age children. I read lots of articles - one today on Facebook - which talk about how SAHMs "work" at home doing a hundred domestic chores. However I work full time and still have to do the exact same number of domestic chores - I just have less time to do them. Am I missing something??

I think that you don't always know what shoes other people in life are wearing. On a straight forward comparison, yes the SAHP has more time to do household chores etc. But I'm not sure that always equates to "life is easier".

Rixera I presume the irony of your post is lost on you?

Here we go. How long till we get I do everything a Sah does and work 40 hours per week?
I admit once kids are at school full time the life of a Sah gets easier and is definitely easier than being a working parent.
However dh does nothing in the house during the week. I do all the childcare cooking laundry cleaning, loading dishwasher etc. I am also taking a few GCSEs and my youngest Dd is only at school 15 hours.
So it is pretty balanced. Dh never has to worry about kids medical stuff or school stuff or club runs and never runs out of his tablets. He never has to deal with a sick child.
If I was working he would have to pick do of that up. So actually the partner of a Sah often has it way too.

Having done both, being a SAHM is so much easier than being a f/t working mother. I found the monotony of being a SAHM tough though.

I don't think it is ironic, I also don't have work related stress- it bothers me when people tell me I have an easier life, I think its equal but different stresses

YABU

it's far too vague, what are you comparing?

Working parents with cleaners/ window cleaner/ gardener and possibly nanny vs SAHM with no help whatsoever? Working single mums with no help whatsoever, no father involvement (so no break at the weekend) vs SAHM with a maid/nanny/and an army of helper? SAHM who deal with all the backoffice side of their husband business?

I think you are completely wrong to put all SAHM in one bag, and the same for working mums. It 's a bit more complicated than that. Yes, some have an easier life, some don't. So what.

Goady Mc Goadson.

""However I work full time and still have to do the exact same number of domestic chores""

If your an LP, then fair enough, but if you have a Partner, then it should be both of you.

I've done every combination, including being Widowed. My house was cleaner when I was a SAHM, so I didn't do the exact same whilst working. I also, cut down on accepting party invites, after school stuff etc.

I was a Carer within the family and did voluntary stuff at the school, though.

It was easier going back to work when I had toddlers than being at home.

It's not goady, there are loads of posts with people going on about how hard staying at home is. It's not hard, really. Can be lonely. But it depends.

I have done both - SAHM to school aged DC and WOHM.

Being a SAHM was so much easier. You get everything done when then DC are at school. No I do the housework, shopping, cleaning, laundry all in the evening and weekend. I don't have any me time anymore. One of my DC is severely disabled (autism and severe learning diffs) which makes it probably twice as hard to work. I would go back to being a SAHM in a heartbeat but cannot afford.

If you have a partner who cannot ever commit to doing their share of holiday and sickness cover, may well be away for days or weeks at a time and isn't around to cover any after school activities then perhaps working outside the home isn't an option?

well, planty of lone parents manage to work despite not having a partner

Does it matter? Do we have to have one 'type' of parent who is much harder working or better than the other? To me this is a totally pointless discussion. Every single family is different and faces its own challenges. I'm sure some parents work harder than others but does that matter or have any impact on anyone else's life? So why even bother thinking about it. It's just petty.

Who cares?

Why compare your life to anyone else's - you do what is right for your family, and let other people do what is right for theirs. Life isn't a competition!

Full time working with parenting no cleaners is really, really hard and this with 2 parents. Shudder to think how full time single parents do it.

Catwoman, plenty of lone parents also can't, or have family to babysit.

It's absurd to say 'some people can, so everyone should'

YANBU. But who doesn't want an easy life? if you can afford it then why not.

Personally I'd be bored to tears, I'm bored enough for the 15 hours a week DS is at nursery. But I only have 1 DS so it lightens the load.

I'm currently a single parent SAHM to an 11 month old as I was recently made redundant but currently job hunting. I'm not going to lie the idea of working full time is terrifying because I don't know how I will manage to do everything or how I will cope if I get stuck in traffic to pick up DS etc but I honestly think if I had a partner at home.to help me i would prefer to be a working mum as it would give me that sense of identity back that I had before I became a mum. Everyone is different though.

I guess it must be 'easier' if you are comparing the two. There are downsides though.

I bloody love it .

Having been in both sides of the fence, being a SAHM is a piece of piss compared to working.

Having been on both sides of the fence, working is a piece of piss compared to being a SAHM.

Swings and roundabouts, you can't possibly speak for everyone.

Having been in both sides of the fence, being a SAHM is a piece of piss compared to working.

Disagree with this - working is much easier in my opinion if it's preschoolers. I have a senior job and work is still easier. Can't comment on school age though.

DailyFail1

I don't disagree at all it is hard. I also think that you can't even compare 2 families, people have different jobs, different salaries, commute, shifts, family or friend support groups.

When people start comparing they are either trying to play martyr or be smug. Totally pointless.

I can't see what it has to do with you tbh.

Genuinely not intended to be goady. Just curious. And for those people asking who cares then just ignore and move on. Perhaps a lot of people who work full time have a lot of help - I don't know. But yes I've read many articles listing all the jobs a SAHM does and I suppose I'm using this forum as a means of reply to say "yes I do those jobs too". Really nice to read some replies from people just acknowledging they have a lovely time pleasing themselves. I love my life but can't deny a small amount of time to myself would be really never ever!!

I could answer this but I don't want to support the idea that comparing which life choice gives women the easier time of it is somehow what we should be doing. It is classic Daily Fail fodder. Not playing.

I'm really enjoying being a stay at home mum. Then again, I also really enjoyed work. They have pros and cons in different ways.

I can't imagine doing it once DD starts school, though, but that's just because I think I'd be bored and broke.

I work three days per week and have a two year old (pregnant with no. 2).

It's so hard. Harder than working full time because my career is being negatively affected by it, and I have pretty much a full time workload anyway so I work at home in the evening a lot. I also feel like a half arsed parent. I miss out on a lot when DD is at nursery. The house is a bit of a shit tip. I'm too tired to be productive right now.

Absolutely no way could I be a SAHM. I love my time with DD on my days off but there is nothing relaxing about it. It is easier working IMO. Whilst mat leave will be nice, I must admit that I'm not looking forward to it this time as much as I did the last time. It's lovely but it is so, so hard.

Think my mainly childless colleagues think I sit around relaxing and drinking tea all day.