To be fed up of people thinking it is really easy for me to be slim?

[Pomegranatesaremessy]

Yes I am slim but I am fed up of the comments I get around me. People saying it is ok for you, you are slim. You just don't put weight on easily like I do, you can eat what you want etc

Well no I can't eat whatever I want. I am careful and that is the reason I am slim. I rarely eat cakes, unhealthy foods. If I do eat a slice of cake people pressurise me to have more because it doesn't matter apparently.

I feel like I am belittled and I can't know what it is like to be overweight. Well yes I can because I was overweight and lost it all and am determined to keep slim now.

I wouldn't criticise anyone who was overweight to criticise their food choices but people think it is ok to make comments to slim people.

In fact, actually, I think a lot of us skinny-fat people are the same. I'll regularly have 2 slices of cheese on toast (Vogel bread, grated cheddar) and 2 kitkats (so 4 fingers) for dinner. Not a huge amount of calories but nutritionally disgusting.

Currently pregnant and the midwife said to me at last appt "keep up the healthy eating" - presumption being as I'm not overweight I'm eating my greens. Honestly my diet can be so bad... I worry if my organs could think, they'd think in screams.

I find it incredibly uncomfortable when people in work talk about feeling fat/having put weight on/needing to diet or exercise etc. There's nothing you can say about it but silence sounds like agreement. And it would be utterly preposterous and patronising to say 'me too', which is the response women are drilled to give a la Mean Girls, when I'm visibly tiny. I think everyone in offices should swerve it. Far too personal a subject for work chat no matter who's saying it.

Excluding pregnancy gains, I've always maintained a slim build, which is down to my diet being fairly well balanced with my activity level. I appear to eat a lot, but will stop when I'm full even if there's two mouthfuls left on a plate (much to the irritation of my mother who by no coincidence is not of a "healthy" weight). My food choices are generally sensible and have a decent mix of food groups which keeps my appetite under control. So while eating a hot lunch may seem indulgent, it will satisfy me longer than a low calorie ready meal/ sandwiches that would leave me ravenous later. I don't tend to snack or eat dessert habitually, and try not to buy them in, fighting temptation in the supermarket, not at home. If it's on offer when I'm out, I'll accept/ decline depending on my appetite. I don't drink much alcohol, and try to control quantities of sweetened drinks, mainly drinking water and fruit teas.

My diet and portion size are gently controlled most of the time. I will gain weight if I sustain an excess. I watch my weight and if the scales begin to regularly exceed a particular weight where I can feel the limit of my comfort zone, I review where the imbalance has occurred and take gentle action to correct it back to my happy level. Losing the pregnancy weight was done in this way without "dieting". So I'm slim through regular gentle maintenance rather than being "naturally slim" and eating what I wish without effort.

The problems with comments like "how come you eat so much and don't get fat" is that in general conversation, the explanation could easily sound sanctimonious and critical.

I probably have an advantage in mindset that this is my default, which is where the "diet" mindset is so vulnerable to long term faliure. Few people will be able to get past the age of 30 and indulge in whatever the feel like and remain "naturally slim".

How often is rarely?

It's the morality play aspect that vexes me - the language of religion and sin. 'Indulge' 'cheat' 'disgusting' 'pig' 'weak' vs 'self-control' 'restraint' etc... Read any weight loss forum and there's women self-flagellating like they've committed murder or bestiality and half of them are size twelves fighting to be size tens so there's not even a health argument. Honestly, if you wanted to design a fruitless, degrading, humiliating way to trap half humanity in a time-sucking diversion it'd be hard to beat the dieting crap.

I also deal with this on an almost daily basis with my own family and it drives me insane. My mother, sister and aunt are all very overweight and are constantly making comments about how I am "lucky to be naturally slim." When I tell them that I am slim because I workout for an hour everyday, don't snack, never overeat and rarely have pudding it is met with an eye roll.

In the past I just tried to ignore it but recently my aunt was diagnosed with a terminal illness caused by her unhealthy lifestyle--and despite this she still refuses to change her ways. She refuses to eat any vegetables and complains about how unfair her illness is, instead of using this as an opportunity to change her life and prolong the time she has left. I have tried to teach her about nutrition (talked to her, bought her books and documentaries about proper eating) and have even started cooking all her of her meals to try to get her to eat well, but the eggs with spinach and kale that I made her this morning ended up in the bin and instead she ate cereal. What is frustrating about the lack of responsibility about health by family members is that unlike co-workers, those who do take responsibility for themselves and live a health lifestyle often end up having to care for family members who who refused to be healthy. It is frustrating and sad.

I was 21 stone. Then i lost ten stone.

I have to refuse a lot of foods to stay this way though.

A GP made me laugh with his jokey comment.

"Usually a person gains weight as they get older . Youve got it all wrong" said with a grin

. I lost 10 stone between 2002 and 2004. Regained 4 stone slowly between 2006 and 2013 (DH had a heart attack back in 2006 and was left with ischemic heart disease He also has COPD. So i had all this to cope with.

I went back to SW in Sept 2013 and it took me 3 and a half years to lose the 4 stone regain.

I know this is off topic, but I'm crying at 'float the fuck away then'.

May change the fuck of to the far side of fuck comment to 'float off'

I'm 'slim' and probably what some would call infuriatingly naturally so - I'm not, it's because I genuinely prefer to eat vegetables, lean meat and don't have a 'sweet tooth' (and I have been called a liar for saying this as obviously I must survive on a lettuce leaf a day blah). I wouldn't dream of commenting on anyone's weight or the foods they eat, but IME it's definitely ok to comment on food habits of those who aren't overweight.

Frankly, I couldn't be arsed

I thought for years I was naturally thin and had a fast metabolism, and couldn't put on weight

Then I had to put on weight as my consultant wouldn't start fertility treatment until I'd got my BMI up to 18.5

So I started tracking my eating using my fitness pal, and it turned out I ate way way fewer calories than I thought I did

I ate - and still do - loads of sugary crap. But overall I don't eat proper meals and so my daily calorie intake is actually very low unless I try really hard to eat properly

To put on weight I had to track my food to make sure I was getting 2000 calories a day (and not just eating 15 chocolate bars as I had to eat low GL for my PCOS)

I really really had to work at getting that many calories in - once I started tracking and forcing myself to eat even though I wasn't hungry, I managed to put on weight. Eating more stretched my stomach so I developed an appetite

Unfortunately stress and sadness kills my appetite so after my miscarriages the weight just dropped right off again. I struggled to force any food down. I manage breakfast and lunch but unless I make myself, I just won't eat dinner. The less I eat the less I want to eat. It's not a conscious thing to restrict my calorie intake - quite the reverse.

Im sorry to hear about your miscarriages banana

Banana . I've lost weight due to illness. Clothes hang off me and I can't replace them at the moment, but still there are ridiculous comments about my 'lucky' figure when I clearly look unwell and dreadful.

It's the morality play aspect that vexes me - the language of religion and sin. 'Indulge' 'cheat' 'disgusting' 'pig' 'weak' vs 'self-control' 'restraint' etc... Read any weight loss forum and there's women self-flagellating like they've committed murder or bestiality and half of them are size twelves fighting to be size tens so there's not even a health argument. Honestly, if you wanted to design a fruitless, degrading, humiliating way to trap half humanity in a time-sucking diversion it'd be hard to beat the dieting crap

^100 x this!

People used to always make comments about how lucky I was to be naturally slim, having no idea I actually had an eating disorder and was petrified to eat and spent hours a day exercising .

Best just not to make comments about people's weight really.

I was called a 'lucky bitch' for being back in my size 10 clothes a day after my baby was born.

My DD was underweight and had to go immediately to the special care baby unit

But how would they have known what clothes you were wearing, unless you told them you were back in a size 10 the day after giving birth?

But how would they have known what clothes you were wearing, unless you told them you were back in a size 10 the day after giving birth?

I didn't tell them. They could tell by looking and I was asked by them too because I looked small after I gave birth

I wish more slim people would be honest about this I agree.

Just be honest op and say in a nice way actually i am not naturally thin, I have been OW and I work hard to keep thin.

I think its the same mentality for some people who are also super successful in what they do like writers etc. Yes Luck plays a part but the people I know work bloody hard, they dont have a normal 9 - 5 day come home eat potter - telly, exercise or whatever - they work all the time. So it ranckles when people say " your successful your lucky" . No I work all the time, and bloody hard.

I feel its inspiring to be honest about it.

Do you know what is so refreshing on this post? So many of us are absolutely fed up of the status quo, the continuous emphasis on weight and how a physical attribute is somehow tied up with morality. There is a film coming out next week in the UK called Embrace. It seems interesting.

Do you know what is so refreshing on this post? So many of us are absolutely fed up of the status quo, the continuous emphasis on weight and how a physical attribute is somehow tied up with morality. There is a film coming out next week in the UK called Embrace. It seems interesting.

I wish more slim people would be honest about this
Why they fuck should they? why sould they have to justify themselves or describe their stomach contents and activity levels just because some other people can't help but be rude/insensitive/envious or ignorant?

What if I said "why can't fat people just be honest about why they're fat"? would that be okay? no!

I have to admit that I did not realise how hard people worked to stay slim. I roughly watch what I eat and am a stone heavier than I should be. I shall be upping my game as I'd like to be slim.

Speaking as a pedestrian what would really help in this weather is that they should grit the pavements as well as the roads.

Then maybe less ppl would feel inclined to get their cars out for short trips After all they are always saying walking everywhere is good for you.