AIBU to think I wasn't rude?

[cherrycrumblecustard]

DD is 2 and this morning threw a tantrum outside the supermarket and was refusing to go in her car seat. I was juggling shopping and keys and phone and trying to manage it all. It's fine, it happens, and I had it under control after a fashion, if you see what I mean.

An elderly woman stopped and STARED (which I hate anyway, it's so rude) but I just ignored her, thinking she'd go. She didn't. I then had this exchange where she tutted and sucked her teeth, then said, "are you all right?" I said cheerily 'yes, thanks, are you?' Which was my way of trying to get her to see all was OK. Or normal at least!

She then said to me, all of which I ignored.
"You can't get her in. You can't get her in. I'd smack her legs if she was mine. You can't get her in!" She kept doing these little titters as well which were really annoying. So in the end I just said "look, to be honest, you're not helping, can you give me a bit of space?"

DH came wandering along at that point (he'd been getting money out) and said I was rude to her! I wasn't, surely?!

She kept doing these little titters as well which

how mean you are about her op.

The thing is though Norma. Any having a go. The parents do it, but OTOH I suppose one could argue. If someone else tells them. Perhaps they might learn. On the whole though. I do think it very rude to override a parent. Not only that but. You don't know what's wrong with a child, before you go in with all the. If that was mine, comments.

i just feel sad for the lady, with her tittering and advice to smack the legs.
it might be the only communication she has all day

I had similar experiences, one with guy at garage who waited around after using air hose to 'advise' me on using it & tyre pressure & the other when changing a tyre.

The first tutted at me continually despite my polite, 'thanks I'm fine', which irritated the hell out of me but the other just gave me a nice wink when I had the tyre changed (think he just assumed I couldn't do it at all never mind as fast as I did)

Maybe her first comment was to offer assitance but no need at all for tittering or tutting - the smacking comment was horrible, maybe of her time but to be fair I know people my age & younger who also believe in 'smacking' and I have less patience with them

it might be the only communication she has all day

You are being facetious surely?

I think the age is relevant because I would, rightly or wrongly, have given a younger woman making these comments (smacking) a bit of a bollocking but not an elderly woman. Because of the generation gap with regards to child rearing approach and the general 'respect your elders' ethos drilled into me.

of course I am not being facetious

have you no compassion for a different generation?

Being of a different generation is not a license to be a twat.

She wasnt a twat.
god some of you are so fucking precious and intolerant

Well, because everyone, to a woman

So you're assuming everyone on here is a woman then Bertrand ? Nice bit of sexism. Why did you feel the need to comment on people's gender? Is it relevant?

She wasnt a twat

She stopped to stare at, judge and laugh at a complete stranger who was clearly struggling. As well as giving unrequested ( and rather controversial) parenting advice. Sounds like a twat to me

You were not rude. Just mothering. She might have been sympathising in a way.

"Well, because everyone, to a woman"

"So you're assuming everyone on here is a woman then Bertrand ? Nice bit of sexism."
Nope. I always use "woman" instead of the generic "man". I also say "old husband's tale"

"So you're assuming everyone on here is a woman then Bertrand ? Nice bit of sexism."
grin Nope. I always use "woman" instead of the generic "man". I also say "old husband's tale"

So it's ok for you to use a gendered term rather than a neutral one, but not ok for the OP to use one about age? One rule for one....

You say old husband's tale Bertrand? You ageist!

Tis positive-discrimination Bertrand

Once I was sitting on the top deck of a bus and an elderly lady sat next to me. We talked for ages and she told me she rode London buses to see the city because she was retired and could. She asked me if I had a boyfriend and I said I did, and told her about him. She pursed her lips and said "he's only trying to get in your pants"

I was 22, so he had been in pants a lot

Despite her age, she was a rude wanker and I wish I told her to fuck off

Lesson- old people can be twats

😂 unless he married you train how do you know she was wrong?

He did marry me. 20 years and 2 children later on from that I can he probably wasn't

Ah that's lovely!

What do you mean? The old woman on the bus was the cunt, not my poor husband 😭

"Lesson- old people can be twats"

Of course they can!

But not by definition.