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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think the nurses shouldn't have spoken in a different language in front of me?

485 replies

ColouringTheBrain · 04/01/2017 18:56

If I start by saying I think our NHS staff do a great job Smile I'm not looking to be flamed, I genuinely want to know if I'm BU.

I had to go to the hospital today, the nurse that initially dealt with me was kind and gentle, also in the room was a colleague of hers ( another nurse). The nurse took my bloods, then went to get another machine, it was then that the two nurses started talking to each other in a different language ( I'm not trying to be vague, I just haven't got a clue what language it was). It made me feel really uncomfortable as it was directly in front of me, whether they were talking about me, or what's on TV, or other members of staff I feel is irrelevant, I felt like they shouldn't be doing it in front of a patient. Obviously I didn't say anything, I wasn't feeling the best anyway, but I also felt slightly intimidated I suppose.

AIBU, or should I just accept it as part of the care?

OP posts:
RedHelenB · 04/01/2017 18:57

YABU they are allowed to talk without patients earwigging!

originalmavis · 04/01/2017 18:58

As long as they weren't looking over at you and sniggering!

Hope you are feeling ok.

BorrowedHearts · 04/01/2017 18:59

YABU if I could talk in another language (other than pig Latin) I would so I could talk in front of others without them being nosey lol

whyohwhy000 · 04/01/2017 18:59

This is difficult. Of course they should tell you everything but it's also best not to worry patients even more.

When I was pregnant (living in Norway at the time) the nurses and doctors made us wear ear defenders when they took over from other shifts so we wouldn't get worried.

RichardBucket · 04/01/2017 19:00

YABU. You're not entitled to know what they're talking about unless they're talking to you.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:00

You are not being unreasonable, OP. In a hospital where the main language is English, and the patient is an English speaker, any conversation should have been conducted.
What they did, in fact, was to exclude you and that was very rude indeed.

user1483387154 · 04/01/2017 19:01

YABU as long as they were communicating in English with you and when it concerned you it doesnt matter what language they speak to each other.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:02

Corrected:

You are not being unreasonable, OP. In a hospital where the main language is English, and the patient is an English speaker, any conversation should have been conducted in E flush.
What they did, in fact, was to exclude you and that was very rude indeed.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:02

CaraAspen

You are not being unreasonable, OP. In a hospital where the main language is English, and the patient is an English speaker, any conversation should have been conducted in English.

What they did, in fact, was to exclude you and that was very rude indeed.

Spam88 · 04/01/2017 19:02

I think it's pretty rude, maybe less so if it was a several bed bay with other people around and they weren't really with you but just happened to be in the same room if that makes sense?

5moreminutes · 04/01/2017 19:02

I can't see why it matters, as they spoke to you in English, treated you professionally and with respect and care, and weren't doing anything to suggest that they were being in any way nasty.

Having lived and travelled in lots of countries I am always dismayed that the British seem unable to cope with people speaking other languages within ear shot. It isn't that way in most of the world.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:03

Please excuse my annoying phone. Grrr

LostSight · 04/01/2017 19:03

Maybe they were discussing something technical and it was easier to explain in their mother tongue. I live in Norway and it is tiring and difficult working full time is a different language from my mother tongue, even though I'm pretty fluent.

nocoolnamesleft · 04/01/2017 19:04

Was one of them new? Could imagine an experienced member of staff explaining (in mutual first language) how to use the other machine they'd brought...

drinkswineoutofamug · 04/01/2017 19:05

The nurse did her job and treated you with respect.
I hope your feeling ok btw.
I don't see an issue of them conversing in their own language. Our doctors do it, nurses do it, the corner shop workers do it.
You got a service, treated no different , job done

BendingSpoons · 04/01/2017 19:05

Personally I'd say YANBU. They were either saying something confidential, in which case they should have moved away, or they were chatting, in which case why do they have more right to private chat whilst working than others who only speak English.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:05

"Spam88

I think it's pretty rude, maybe less so if it was a several bed bay with other people around and they weren't really with you but just happened to be in the same room if that makes sense?"

That was the scenario I imagined, too. But even if others were around and this happened in a ward, I still think what they did was rude and added to the OP's anxiety.

froomeonthebroom · 04/01/2017 19:06

I hate this and I think it's rude. If it's a non work related conversation they shouldn't be having it while dealing with you anyway.

LoupGarou · 04/01/2017 19:06

YABU, unless they were pointing at you and discussing you I can't really see it being an issue. I love listening to people speak in other languages, I always imagine they're talking about an amazing diamond heist they're planning when its probably only what they're having for dinner! Grin
That said, when I was pregnant we lived in Russia, and for some reason the doctors and nurses didn't realise I speak Russian, it made for some rather interesting discussions, its amazing what people will discuss in front of you when they think you don't understand them Grin

PietariKontio · 04/01/2017 19:07

YABU; I'm not sure why you were uncomfortable unless you felt they were talking about you. There's a lot of information hospital staff have to share during their work, and most isn't relevant to one patient.
It's happened to me, and to be honest I was completely unbothered.

YelloDraw · 04/01/2017 19:08

I think that is very rude.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:08

For those implying nosiness, I think that is not the point and is frankly a bit off.

CaraAspen · 04/01/2017 19:09

"froomeonthebroom

I hate this and I think it's rude. If it's a non work related conversation they shouldn't be having it while dealing with you anyway."

Exactly.

SoberSusan · 04/01/2017 19:09

YANBU. Of course they were being rude. The point is you didn't know what they were saying - whether they were discussing you or not - and it made you uncomfortable.

I wonder if the responses here would be different if the nurses had started whispering to each other?

Fridaynightlights · 04/01/2017 19:10

Yanbu English is my second language, I'd always speak English in a work place even when just chatting nonsense.

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