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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To do the washing up in diamonds?

175 replies

38cody · 02/01/2017 23:43

Not just in Diamonds but...
When I lost my wedding ring my Great Aunt gifted me a beautiful 14 Diamond eternity style ring, she had it made in the 70's and it's very lovely and looks fab with my engagement ring. I've had it for about a year and wear it every day as a wedding band. It's way nicer than my original.
She's one of those people who give you something but don't quite let go. I took her on holiday and she was tutting because I swim with my rings on, complains to my mother (her sister) that I garden with them on and nearly collapsed when I played in the kids sandpit wearing 'her' diamonds.
Anyway, on boxing day I was doing lots of washing up - I usually dishwash everything but we already had a load in so I handwashed the rest. That evening she noticed that a stone was missing from the ring and she is really really cross and keeps bleating on about how she had it all those years and only wore it occasionally and how upset she is and how nobody ever washes up in a diamond ring and it was bound to happen!
I'll get the stone replaced but I'm not a 'keep for best' kind of person and like to enjoy wearing it daily.
So my question is really - Do you take off your rings (if they have a stone) every time you wash up, bath the kids, go swimming, play in the sand...etc etc and AIBU not to do so?

OP posts:
stillwantrachelshair · 03/01/2017 00:24

I wear mine all the time (engagement ring with wedding ring on one hand & another diamond ring on the other hand) except when making pastry or crumble topping as they are a nightmare to clean afterwards.
I hate people who give gifts with strings attached. Although that is possibly hypocritical of me as I was touched over Christmas when two different sets of friends that we visited had dressed their DC in hand-me-downs that we had provided in the past.

Original poster
38cody · 03/01/2017 00:27

The versatility and variety of our language is something I enjoy. I suppose I wrote 'gifted me' rather than 'gave me' in order to make a meaningful distinction between a casual 'giving' of a ring and the presentation of the ring as an important gift. I fail to see why this is a issue!

PS:Gifted and talented has seen it's day - very old school!

OP posts:
Atthebottomofthegarden · 03/01/2017 00:34

I have a diamond engagement ring and a wedding ring set with 8 tiny diamonds. I last took them off when I was expecting DD as my fingers were swelling.

Just gave them an experimentary tug, and I don't think I could get them off now if I wanted too!

Different story if you have a soft stone like an opal though obviously.

Atthebottomofthegarden · 03/01/2017 00:34

DD is nearly 9 now by the way!

UnbornMortificado · 03/01/2017 00:34

Gifted me sounds better anyway, quite posh. I have to moderate my language on here

WorraLiberty · 03/01/2017 00:35

Honestly, just ignore the grammar saddos.

If you toss them a bone, it makes them think they have a place on public internet forums.

UnbornMortificado · 03/01/2017 00:36

Posted to soon.

So I don't type how I speak.

At least you didn't put lol which is almost a hanging offence.

IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 03/01/2017 00:46

I'm lol at thing about all the lols I did when I started here few yrs ago.

It's such a pain in arse when on old phone to find Grin than lol, I'm going to rebel.

Original poster
38cody · 03/01/2017 00:47

I took my 6yr old to see Sooty and he was shouting lol instead of laughing! I nearly hung him!

I shall have the ring repaired - and continue to wear it daily.

OP posts:
IgnoreMeEveryOtherReindeerDoes · 03/01/2017 00:47

Added the word thing just to confuse you

Original poster
38cody · 03/01/2017 00:49

How about GOL - Guffawed out loud? Is that okay?

OP posts:
AliTheMinx · 03/01/2017 00:53

I have 3 diamond rings - engagement, wedding and eternity - and I never take them off xxx

GilMartin · 03/01/2017 01:02

I can see why she's a bit peeved. It was obviously important to her and took good care of it for a long period of time.

Therefore she gave it to you on the assumption that you too would appreciate and care for it.

I can completely see why she'd be cross when she sees it treated in what she sees as a cavalier manner. She's been partially vindicated when within a comparatively short period of time it has already suffered significant damage.

There's a middle ground between saving it for high days and holidays and wearing it in situations where it is likely to get damaged.

sobeyondthehills · 03/01/2017 01:03

I wear my grandmothers ring, she left it in her will to me, and I never take it off, I have no idea how old it is or if it is worth anything. I did hear a thing that her mother gave it to her, which would make it well over 100 years but I am not sure on that.

So I would say its between 20-100 years old.

I am wrong I take it off for baking which is rare

moreslackthanslick · 03/01/2017 01:07

I wear a 3k emerald ring at all times to do everything. It was my mother's it gave her great pleasure as it does me. It was gifted when she died so different situation but I know she would love me wearing it "everyday" like it was nothing.

TheThingsWeAdmitOnMN · 03/01/2017 01:11

I guess it's just hard for her that she had it all that time & looked after it and you've only had it 5 minutes and already lost a diamond. She probably did take it off all the time or keep it for best and feels sad that you don't do the same. If it was me, I'd keep it for 'occasions' and get a new engagement ring. It's fine to do as you please with your own rings, but not to the point where you're upsetting your Aunt. Yes it is yours now as she has given it to you, but I think it's only reasonable to see the connection she has with it & to respect that.

gleam · 03/01/2017 01:25

If you're wearing it like that, then possibly you need to have the settings checked more regularly?

GilMartin · 03/01/2017 01:46

I took my 6yr old to see Sooty and he was shouting lol instead of laughing! I nearly hung him!

Sorry, I couldn't resist.

You nearly hanged him.

A picture gets hung, an errant six-year old runs the risk of getting hanged!

[Ducks for cover]

kel12345 · 03/01/2017 01:47

I never take off my wedding, eternity or engagement ring, ever. Even when I was pregnant they never came off my finger. But I'm a big jewellery person. As well as that I also wear 3 other rings, 6 earrings, several chains- some of which never come off, it's only the long 2 I don't sleep in, and bangles and a bracelet as well.
I've never had any problems with any stones falling out.
Your aunt sounds very much like mine, gives you something but keeps going on about it.

Original poster
38cody · 03/01/2017 01:52

Ah Gill - But what if my intention were not to kill, but just to hang?
and...lol

OP posts:
CarlitosWay · 03/01/2017 02:15

I almost never take my diamonds off. They are set in string settings though. I garden and swim etc in them. The only time I take them off is if I'm on my road bike and going for a fast long ride as I think I could damage the ring if I fell off.

mum2Bomg · 03/01/2017 02:39

My engagement ring was my grandmothers and is 75 years old. I wear it for everything as I think if the diamond was going to fall out it would have by now!

Bubblebathwater · 03/01/2017 02:40

I take my engagement ring off and put it on a necklace I wear for most manual work and doing dishes etc but I wear my wedding ring 24/7 but it's flat, no diamonds and a lot cheaper then the engagement ring was!

GilMartin · 03/01/2017 03:03

Cody

Nailed to an art gallery wall is probably a fairer punishment for a first time lol-er.

Grindelwaldswand · 03/01/2017 03:28

You shouldn't wash up in diamonds actually, a jeweler told me when i got a diamond ring that if you wash up in it or bathe in it etc then water gets trapped under the stones and the pressure pops them out and they are lost forever which is probably what happened to yours washing up OP

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