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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU... MIL and Chocolate!

139 replies

Stardust1901 · 29/12/2016 11:39

I've name changed as this is possibly outing.

I'm pretty annoyed but don't know how to approach this.

Yesterday MIL babysat for us so DP and I could go out for a bit. Lovely! We are very grateful.

However once we get back and MIL leaves, I start to tidy up. MIL has given my baby (5months) half a bar of chocolate. She didn't ask if it was ok or anything, I'm quite annoyed.

I'm not one of those who believes 'she babysat for you so just be grateful' but I don't know how to approach it and tell MIL that I'm not happy without coming across as ungrateful.

OP posts:
OwlinaTree · 29/12/2016 11:41

How do you know she gave him chocolate?

FatalKittehCharms · 29/12/2016 11:42

How do you know this, OP? Maybe MIL ate it?

SarahOoo · 29/12/2016 11:45

"hi MIL, thanks so much for babysitting but I need to check something.....did you give the baby chocolate?"

She'll answer....you say "please do not do that, baby is too young"

Ta da!

StillStayingClassySanDiego · 29/12/2016 11:49

How do you know?

MistresssIggi · 29/12/2016 11:49

If I had a chocolate bar, I'd use it myself not waste it on a baby.
If my dcs had been given chocolate as their first food I'd have been very annoyed. You will need to ask, otherwise you won't feel comfortable about her babysitting again and it's a godsend to have someone to watch your baby who you trust.

MollyHuaCha · 29/12/2016 11:58

My MIL wd have fed my babies five course roast meals with coffee and after dinner liqueurs if she'd have had her way... It's a generational thing. I remember my PIL bring quite shocked when I refused to allow my 6 mnth DC to eat the Smarties they had brought as a treat. You need to gently educate them on how baby feeding has moved on!

Original poster
Stardust1901 · 29/12/2016 11:59

I know because it's the chocolate bars she put in a mini stocking for DD and it was all melted at the tip, like it's been sucked.

OP posts:
Original poster
Stardust1901 · 29/12/2016 12:00

Oh and there's chocolate on DDs bib!

OP posts:
Marmalade85 · 29/12/2016 12:02

How is this outing? Hmm

lunchboxtroubles · 29/12/2016 12:04

not ideal but he won't come to any harm. I did BLW from about that age and my daughter grabbed a handful of burger/coleslaw/salad off my plate and shoved it in her mouth before I could stop her! she's fine. just sort out boundaries for next time.

Original poster
Stardust1901 · 29/12/2016 12:07

Oh I know it not harmful! I'm just a bit worried that she didn't think to ask first and it wasn't just a lick it was half a bar!

OP posts:
FeckinCrutches · 29/12/2016 12:11

and it was all melted at the tip, like it's been sucked

But you said earlier it was half a bar?

GloriaGaynor · 29/12/2016 12:13

The tip of the half that's left...

FeckinCrutches · 29/12/2016 12:14

Ah right!

NavyandWhite · 29/12/2016 12:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Temporaryname137 · 29/12/2016 12:18

It's annoying but if you don't see her very often I would let it go - DF has spent all morning feeding DD pieces of digestive biscuit because he loves it when she comes up to him and asks!! (I was never allowed biscuits as a child...) I've let him get on with it because we're only up here a few times a year, and when he comes to us, we don't have biscuits in the house!

However, if you see her regularly and it's likely to be a regular thing, you prob need to explain politely that you don't want your DC having chocolate yet!

Temporaryname137 · 29/12/2016 12:19

Sorry for all the !

!!

WorraLiberty · 29/12/2016 12:19

If you're not comfortable enough to simply say, "MIL did you give the baby some chocolate, only I saw some on her bib?"

Then I really don't think at this stage, you should use her to babysit.

It's just simple, basic communication surely?

QueenOfTheFuckingWorld · 29/12/2016 12:19

YADNBU. Yes nice of her to babysit but she clearly needs a bit of education in modern parenting!
Having had a similar issue (with a dairy allergic baby) MIL is not alone with my baby.

AHedgehogCanNeverBeBuggered · 29/12/2016 12:25

YANBU, babies' guts aren't mature enough for solids at 5 months, and chocolate is certainly not a recommend weaning food - it can damage her milk teeth, even the ones that haven't come through yet.

Tell your MIL the advice above, if she apologises and says she won't do it again then let it go - if she starts trying to justify it then don't leave your DD with her again till she's older.

AlwaysNeverOnTime · 29/12/2016 12:29

I'd be so annoyed. Fair enough half a chocolate bar won't kill anyone but the baby is 5 months old! I don't even let my 3 and 5 year olds eat more than a few squares of a chcoclate bar at a time! You have to tell her now before it happens again. Obviously ask her if she did give it to her first.

AlwaysNeverOnTime · 29/12/2016 12:30

You're not even supposed to start weaning until 6 months anyway

SapphireStrange · 29/12/2016 12:32

5 months Hmm I don't have kids, but that sounds young for chocolate.

I wouldn't like that she hadn't asked. I'd have a firm word.

ppeatfruit · 29/12/2016 12:43

This is not a generation thing, this a twit type thingl ! My eldest is 38 soon and I knew all about not giving chocolate to under ones. She didn't have any , it was considered odd by older people though.

It's a shame that it's still considered a 'treat' by many.

Rubies12345 · 29/12/2016 12:50

When you opened the stocking and there was bars of chocolate inside perhaps you could have cleared things up then. Baby cannot eat chocolate she is not weaned yet. Old people can get confused.

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