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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To expect people to be dressed if they've invited people round

903 replies

Exileinengland1999 · 28/12/2016 14:37

Just that really- got invited round for Xmas drinks at some friends at 4pm and they were in their pjs and stayed like that for a 2 hour visit - Aibu to feel uncomfortable with the extreme casual-ness of it all. Even my kids asked why they were in their pjs Confused

OP posts:
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15
1horatio · 29/12/2016 16:40

Simon

It is dirty, if you're still in your pyjamas at 4 pm, you've been in them for nearly 24 hours and not showered.

No, at least certainly not in my case. I always shower in the evening. Going to bed without showering seems a bit disgusting to me personally.

I mean, I don't really care about your showering habits. But you can't just assume that everybody showers in the morning, can you?

SimonLeBonOnAndOn · 29/12/2016 16:52

Hard of thinking? Priceless.

Mindtrope · 29/12/2016 16:54

But even if you shower in the evening you will still be pretty rancid in the morning. We each lose a litre of sweat during the night- you are carrying all the impurities from your body on your pyjamas all day.

Yeuch.

RichardBucket · 29/12/2016 16:57

When your PJs are dirty you change them... like any other item of clothing.

It's really, really not hard.

Mindtrope · 29/12/2016 16:59

I don't know- there are items of clothing I change without them being "dirty".

My socks never smell, they don't look dirty, but I change them every day anyway.

1horatio · 29/12/2016 17:02

mind

I actually don't carry all these impurities around all day. ;)

But seriously, are you really trying to tell me it's cleanlier to bring all the 'outside' dirt into your bed? And what about your pyjamas? Won't they suck up all the 'day sweat' and grime and keep it In them? And the sheets?

Lieby · 29/12/2016 17:28

That's gross-means they haven't showered. Ugh

Neem · 29/12/2016 17:32

I'm with you. It's find for people to lounge around in whatever they want, but if they've invited you, at least they could wash and change into casual clothes

Mrsprawntail · 29/12/2016 17:34

We had friends who a couple of occasions invited us over for dinner and on arrival at agreed time would be ironing or just got home (so clearly not ready for guests) , then proceed to say they had not thought about dinner yet so would we mind a takeaway (which we paid for) and they had not time to get any drink in so could we pop to the local supermarket to get supplies in (in addition to the bottle we had already naturally bought as a contribution). After the third time we realised their definition of inviting people over for dinner was radically different to ours. No longer friends. And to answer OP - pjs just lazy.

ManaFleet · 29/12/2016 17:39

Can I clarify - PJs or comfies? I would consider PJs to be nightclothes and therefore generally worn with no undies. Comfy, lounging-around-the-house clothes are something else entirely though look very similar. We wear comfies at home all the time, guests or not. I would never sit around the house in my jeans or shoes or office type stuff.

Was it actually pyjamas?

user1472573736 · 29/12/2016 17:42

Maybe one of them has a hidden disability and they can only be comfy in pjs (I'm talking from experience here) and the rest of the family didn't want that person feeling bad so they all wore pj's. I love having guests visit - if I'm having a bad day I'll be in my pj's but I'd still want them to visit.....otherwise I could go weeks or even months without seeing friends.

Does it really matter what people wear? Are you ok with people wearing bikinis and swim Shorts? I mean that shows far more than a comfy pair of pj's.

ZaZathecat · 29/12/2016 17:42

Op, we need to know exactly what they wore please.

Marymoosmum14 · 29/12/2016 17:44

There is nothing wrong with it, at least they were in pyjamas, they could have been in just a dressing own like I usually am.

LockedOutOfMN · 29/12/2016 17:47

I would say it's odd that they invited you round at 4pm and were all wearing PJs. It's not as if you popped in unexpectedly at 10am.

What did they say when your children asked why they were in PJs? Is it their Christmas holiday tradition?

ItShouldHaveBeenJingleJess · 29/12/2016 17:48

Personally, I wouldn't wear my sleep apparel Grin during the day but not because I think it's dirty/lazy/a sign that I'm inherently evil - it's just I like the little ritual of putting them on at the end of a long day, and if I wore them all the time, it would take away that 'aahhhh....' moment for me.

CaraAspen · 29/12/2016 17:48

"SimonLeBonOnAndOn

Roar at pyjamas not for sleeping in. Heard it all.

It is dirty, if you're still in your pyjamas at 4 pm, you've been in them for nearly 24 hours and not showered."

Quite. Imagine dossing around like that in front of invited guests.

avamiah · 29/12/2016 17:50

There is nothing wrong with wearing pj,s or dressing gown.
In fact it's nearly 6pm and I'm wearing mine now,as I'm off work till 4 Jan and I'm just relaxing at home watching tv.
However if I'm inviting friends around for drinks then I'm going to get dressed.
I wouldn't dream of inviting friends around and still be in my pj,s unless it was a pyjama party.

miniplaty · 29/12/2016 17:51

They probably forgot you were coming. We were once invited for dinner by my husband's friend. We turned up, the wife opened the door in her pjs, husband was too. We didn't know them well and it was so obvious he had forgotten to tell her

ItShouldHaveBeenJingleJess · 29/12/2016 17:53

Were they these pyjamas, OP? In which case I can see why you might feel a tad miffed.....

To expect people to be dressed if they've invited people round
CaraAspen · 29/12/2016 17:53

Wearing pyjamas, clean or not, after a shower or not, is slobbish and uncouth and ill mannered. The end.

OldmumofKent · 29/12/2016 17:55

Just grim

ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 29/12/2016 17:55

Sleep apparel? ooh get you, JingleJess Grin

I too will be donning my sleep apparel worthwith and then plan to recline in my boudoir to peruse the internet.

Janeybobs · 29/12/2016 17:57

Very odd, did they also ask you to put your keys in a bowl ....

Toyslayer · 29/12/2016 18:04

My pjs are posher than my clothes Blush