To want to visit George Michaels house

[jazzy57uk]

I am a MASSIVE fan of 30+ years, have every record, TV/radio appearance and clippings galore. I am devastated by his death and would like to visit his London home to say goodbye. OH says is childish, pathetic and not appropriate- it's a private matter that should only be for people who actually knew him. I know he'll be massively disappointed if a go but I'll regret it if I don't. WWYD?

Im still considering it myself and trying to find out where in Highgate his house is. Hope you went.

OP updated yesterday that they decided not to go.

Go to The Flask pub, you can see it from there and there's bound to be an obvious circus

At St James Church in Bushey, Hertfordshire, his childhood town.There is a book of condolences open and candles were lit the night he died. Even though you've decided to not go to his home, if Bushey isn't too far it could be an option. The whole town is in mourning it seems, everyone has a tale to tell of school, cubs/scouts, first gigs etc

Ozgirl, I've posted the address above on the thread- the Grove, Highgate. There are still people visiting- maybe 20-30 there when I drove past earlier today (I live round the corner). No one would be bothered by you coming to pay your respects.

That sounds more like it Plastique.

I live near his Highgate house and even my mum went today.

I was such a fan of GM but really... I had no spiritual connection to him and I'm really not sure that any of his fans have. Where does a spiritual connection come from? He was an important part of my life, but I don't have it. He was a fantastic musician, a troubled soul, a wonderful bloke but there is no reason that I can think of to traipse to his home to lay flowers. What a great feeling it would be instead to donate the price of the flowers and the travel to McMillan or Terence Higgins, that to me is caring.
See, that's where I think we all differ. I've appreciated his music in the past, loved to dance and sing along to his classics. Who are we to say how others should process their feelings though?
If laying a respectful bunch of flowers at the gates of his house is what eases your pain a little, where's the harm? If it intruded on his family itself though, no.
People may not know him personally, but music/the arts is closely linked to emotions. Stands to reason there will be strong grief felt, even if not everyone does.
I've never cried on a celeb I'd never met but when Alan Rickman left us this year I did. I've never met the guy. Proper gutted though when he passed. Cried.Been "with" me since teens so grown up with him and "loved" him.To suddenly go? Upset. Understatement. Presumably it's the same here with huge George Michael fans.
Don't tell others how they should feel. There's no one way when it comes to death.

It's such a usual thing for people to do, to pay their respects, I'm surprised there are so many naysayers on here. Way back in history people have always said goodbye to a person like this.
Like some of the others I am surprised that some posters seem
determined to tell people what they should or should not do. Obviously intrusion Daily Mail style on s family's grief is not required, but a quiet personal pilgrimage is always acceptable.

I'm not telling others glitterazi. Suggesting donating to one of his favourite charities instead of spending money travelling and on flowers would be a wonderful thing to do, that's all. I don't expect anyone on here to take any notice of anything I say TBH . It's all just opinion.

Yes it's just opinion. Nobody on MN can tell anyone else what they should or should not do. Adult people make their own decisions...

Squeegle, Are you saying that posters here saying that they WILL go to his house are telling other posters that they MUST go also? No, because that would be ridiculous. There's a difference of opinion, that's all. Do what you want, because you will anyway.

Just as you have the right to post about your wish to do a certain thing, others have the equal right to post that they think it's the wrong thing to do. Just because you don't like the opposing view doesn't mean posters are wrong to have it.

Newsflash - it's possible to both travel to and lay flowers on a person's grave/outside their house AND donate to charity at the same time! Now who would have thought that?

OP, fair enough if that's your decision not to go. I've already mentioned that I make a biannual pilgrimage to the grave of my favourite singer on his birthday and anniversary, where I leave a card and flowers. I don't just "dump" my "£5 Asda carnations" (although why the fuck it should matter where flowers were bought, or how much they cost, is beyond me). I arrange them carefully in the vases and pots, and tidy up and clean the headstone if necessary. I don't have a photo taken of myself, weeping and wailing (I don't think so), or otherwise. I do take photos of the flowers and post them on a closed, private FB group which is accessed by fans as well as several close family members and friends of this singer. I also often take pictures of the surrounding area, as his grave is in a lovely spot, overlooking the river, and post those pictures too. Some fans live overseas and are unlikely to be able to visit, so I know they appreciate this.

I've mentioned that sometimes I've met family members on some of my visits. We have a little chat before going on our way. They appreciate the tributes and love that are still shown towards their relative, and have never had a problem with fans quietly and respectfully paying tribute.

Oh, and I have a regular DD set up to donate to several charities, including one that is particularly relevant to this person. I'm not making a big thing of that, but since some on here mention charity. After all, I hope that nobody disapproving ever spends money on treats, meals out, trips to the hairdresser, salon etc. Because yunno, you should just donate that money to charity instead.

Anyway, I already have arrangements in place for my next visit (it's a major anniversary), and I shall give not a fraction of a shiny shite whether or not any of the espousers of some of the nasty, snotty, sanctimonious tripe on here approve.

And I make no apologies for my overuse of in this post, either.

liz sorry but you just sound like a fruit loop.

Tidying the grave of someone who has nothing to do with you is so invasive and weird.

Probably why scattering ashes to the wind or in the sea is a good idea.

But think of the cost of the scuba gear for visiting

liz that's very attentive of you but it's so overstepping the mark and veering into intrusive and obsessive behaviour.

I know, I can imagine the alternative too of uber-fans scouring the land with their Dysons...

I'm only laughing about it because my other gut reaction is disgust that some people feel the need to inveigle their way in, to intrude on a family. I can't imagine that the super-fans would stop if the family didn't like it because the fans... that's true love, that is and nobody must get in the way of it.

Walter...imagine hovering up bits of Rover and er... mud along with your beloved? You'd need a CSI team to forensically pick them out.

How is it not paying my respect?..Like i said everyone has there own way in dealing with his death,and people that attend a place of his residency to lay some flowers or light a candle as some do,is a way of paying your respect.Just because he is not a relative to all these people that are attending doesn't mean you cant pay your respects as you didn't personally know him.He was a great icon and will be sadly missed by alot of people.

Some very harsh and judgemental posts on here.

Guess what, folks? It's actually possible to grieve for someone you don't personally know or even seen in RL. I feel that I'm grieving for GM, just as I grieved for other people who died that I was huge fan of's. If I were in London I'd certainly go to his house in Highgate to pay my respects. But it's not just about respect - it's about being with others who feel the same, and to somehow make sense of the tragedy. I did similarly in 1997 at Hyde Park for Diana's funeral.

but a quiet personal pilgrimage is always acceptable.

Surely it is up to his actual family and friends to make a decision on what is 'always acceptable' not you!