Was this neglectful? Regarding DD's sleepover

[user1477282676]

DD is 8 and is good friends with a little girl 5 doors down. They don't attend the same school but over this year they've forged a lovely friendship.

This is Australia so 5 doors down is quite a distance compared to how it would be in the UK...all the houses on the street are detached and have very large gardens...we have no problem with DD running up the road to her mate's house to call for her and her friend does the same.

The issue is this. The street backs onto a large golf course...massive with a lot of old trees....the neighbours back garden, like ours...is backed onto the course.

Last night DD was asked to sleepover there and we agreed this was fine.

I spoke to her on the phone at about 8.00pm and she was happy, said goodnnight....she mentioned they were playing in the "den" in friend's back garden which is right by the back gate...the "den' is a broken down play house...wooden but not at all air or insect proof...there's a large hole on one side and it's usually mucky.

Anyway...about 11.00pm DH takes our dog for his evening walk...he goes all around the golf course and returns on a route taking him past the friend's back gate...he is about 50 feet from the house walking along when he hears this sad voice shouting "Mummy!" Mummy!" he realises it's DD!

He calls her name and she shouts "Daddy!" and he goes up to the den to see her...turns out they've been allowed to sleep out in this den...and the friend has gone into a deep sleep from which she can't be woken...DD is scared witless by the sounds of the wildlife...this area is full of wild animals...and she is too scared to go to the house to get her mate's Mother as the garden is so long and she'd been calling out for ages...

Is it a bit off to let two little girls sleep in a den like that...completely acessible from the golf course...very little protection from weather and out of earshot of the main house?

I might be being a bit precious so thought I'd ask. DH phoned the friend's mother whilst he stood there with DD and she laughed...she was in bed, asleep...he told her DD wanted to come home so he thought he'd let her know as the friend was now alone in the den...the mother just said "that's fine" and went!

DD was so relieved to be home!

Pluto I do not mean the children would get lost in the outback! I must be making no sense.

In the situation given my main concern would be spiders, snakes or predatory men! Probably highly unlikely but I would worry.

The most scary point is the OP was not told the girls would be sleeping out.

Cheese when I said "and went" I mean she went downstairs.

I'm an Aussie and I've never seen a wild dingo. Australia isn't anymore dangerous than loads of places, in fact it's pretty safe. The weird risk assessment of not safe to sleep outside because of dingos or snakes or a ransomed iced up golfer?

I'd be happy for a couple of eight-year-olds to sleep in a tent or a playhouse at the end of even a very large garden, I think.

However, I would expect:

a) that the parent of the kid with the den would check with the other parents first to make sure they were OK with it too
b) that the kids would be given torches or a lamp and, if possible, a phone in case they got scared
c) that if one of them was scared, the parent hosting the sleepover would be sympathetic rather than laughing.

Some kids are hard as nails about that sort of thing, while others get spooked - in fact, this applies to adults too! What's fine for one eight-year-old isn't necessarily fine for another, so I certainly think the other parent should have discussed this with you before letting them sleep outside.

Same as things like letting them watch films or play games with a slightly higher age rating - if a parent thinks their kid will be able to watch it without being scared or disturbed, that's fine, but I wouldn't expect them to let other kids watch it without asking their parents first.