Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Flip

1 2 ··· 6 7 8 9 10 11

Original poster

For not being allowed to sign the teacher's card?

265 replies

BigApple11 · 14/12/2016 15:41

I haven't put into my dc's class teachers' Christmas collection, for a few reasons.
Namely they ( the class reps) want £5 per teacher. That's £15 for my DS and £10 for my DD.
I also have an older child.
Christmas costs us a fortune.
The teachers are paid by my taxes.
Yes they do a brilliant job.
I bake them cakes throughout the year.
I help in class every week.
AIBU to think I should be allowed to sign the bloody card even though I haven't put into the collection???
The class rep pisses me off but that's besides the point. I think

OP posts:

Doowappydoo · 14/12/2016 23:21

Oh lovely - we are now bitching about types of mums are we

We have class reps, I'm not one but it seems fairly thankless, the main purpose is to remind class about PTA stuff, try and drum up volunteers for the fair - about 4 emails a year on average and quite easy to ignore if you want to but no reason to slate the people who do it and I don't believe they are all on a power trip.

I don't think class collections should be presented as in any way compulsory or as an obligation but my experience is that someone sends an email saying "is anyone interested in a class Christmas collection £5 each?" and if enough people want to do it to make it worthwhile that's what you do. If you don't want to for whatever reason then don't. The amount of vitriol that gets thrown around at people who try and participate in any way in their kids school on here is pretty cuntish in my view

GravyAndShite · 14/12/2016 23:33

YABU. No contribution, no signature. Also, get over your issues with the class rep - how hard can it be to get on with someone in this type of relationship?

dontpokethebear · 14/12/2016 23:34

I volunteered because nobody else did. I felt sorry for the mum who did it last year, as she would have had to do it again if no one else did.

ShelaghTurner · 15/12/2016 07:20

Exactly. Our previous rep had done two years and had had enough. She really didn't want to do another year but would have had to and I didn't think that was fair. But yes it's a thankless task. Absolutely no resentment from any parent in our class, they're always very grateful for the reminders etc but it's pretty full on for the rep.

StripedTulip · 15/12/2016 08:29

I was with you until the taxes comment

Indeed. Teachers pay taxes too! And those of us without children in the education system any more also pay taxes. YABU

StStrattersOfMN · 15/12/2016 09:29

£5 is far too much, £1 each would mean approx £30, depending on class size. You can buy a perfectly adequate gift for £30, and nobody gets left out.

Timeforteaplease · 15/12/2016 09:47

If you don't want to join in the class gift, YANBU.
But if you don't join in, you don't sign the card as if you did.
Imagine it was a friend's birthday and everyone was chipping in but you decided not to - would you still expect to sign the joint card?

Doowappydoo · 15/12/2016 09:51

Not if you are spitting between 2 teachers and a TA, I think £5 is reasonable, it would cost far more than that to buy separately which is why so many people seem keen to do it ime. It's not a case of being left out though is it? Some people don't agree with teacher presents on principle, some like to do their own thing - if you don't want to participate then don't. I do because it's cheaper, less hassle and it's a way of giving something that they might actually want (or could easily give to charity if so inclined)

ShelaghTurner · 15/12/2016 10:59

It's not the same as trying to muscle in on a birthday present you didn't contribute to. The card is signed by the children, the children who have no control over what their parents do and just want to write a message to their teacher. That's why they should all be able to sign, regardless of what their parents do or don't contribute.

Doowappydoo · 15/12/2016 11:03

Our card wasn't signed by the children and I don't think the OPs was either, I did ours this year and I work, no way could I co-ordinate 20 odd kids signing 3 cards.

GinIsIn · 15/12/2016 11:04

It's a lot of money but YABU to want to sign the card without paying - if it's the card that goes with the present then surely you are just trying to pretend you've contributed without actually paying?

ShowMePotatoSalad · 15/12/2016 11:08

I was also with you until the taxes comment which seems very defensive and also, wrong. How much do you pay in taxes a year? Divvy up between all the things that taxes are spent on and then look at what's left for education...how much of that is spent on teacher's salaries?

Anyway, if you don't want to contribute that's fine. But of course you wouldn't sign the card. Buy a thank you card for them yourself and sign to your heart's content.

tangerino · 15/12/2016 11:11

The idea that being class rep is a power trip made me laugh out loud.

If the card is accompanying a gift that you didn't chip in for, you shouldn't sign it- not sure why you would want to.

BarbarianMum · 15/12/2016 11:18

Personally, I'd rather gnaw off my own leg than be class rep. Consequently, I'm always very grateful that someone else is prepared to do it. I don't understand this constant need to rubbish those who are prepared to volunteer for the jobs that no-one else wants to do.

Mumzypopz · 15/12/2016 12:22

I just can't understand the need for a class rep. So far people have said it's the go between person between PTA and parents? Don't need this....our PTA have a Facebook site....they have said it's to tell people about events....again, our PTA do this quite nicely over school twitter site or Facebook site, don't need an email reminder as well....they have said the class reps volunteer at school fairs....in our school, anyone can volunteer.....as a parent, really don't need another parent telling me about things constantly and emailing me etc....the name class rep just irritates me, thankfully they don't seem to actually be representatives of parents in the class, but reps of the PTA, in the class.

Gottagetmoving · 15/12/2016 12:29

Bloody hell - I wouldn't give any money or even want to sign the card.
What a load of nonsense,

CaraAspen · 15/12/2016 12:37

Is this for real? Teachers do not expect this sort of thing, for goodness sake! It sounds embarrassing. I take it we are talking primary school level?

CaraAspen · 15/12/2016 12:39

Class reps are usually kids! Some of you have parent class reps, too?
Erm...why?

CaraAspen · 15/12/2016 12:42

However, given that you are in this weird situation, of course the protocol should be that you do not get to sign the card! You opted out.

Cataline · 15/12/2016 12:42

You don't pay their taxes. Can't believe people still spout that shite.

You haven't put in the collection so don't get to sign the card which goes with the present to say who it's from. Send your own card if you're that bothered.

Cataline · 15/12/2016 12:43

Didn't RTFT and have just seen your more recent comments so I apologise for my ride and blunt response above.

Cataline · 15/12/2016 12:44

rude not ride FFS!

Earlgreywithmilk · 15/12/2016 12:45

Exactly Mumzypops. The role of class rep was instigated by the parents who themselves want to do that kind of thing and feel they should be constantly organising something. There is no actual need for the role. when they realise it's a thankless task and they don't actually want to do it anymore they try to push it on someone else or try to make those parents that don't want to get involved in school feel guilty. It has now become a poison chalice that gets harder to fill. I know there are parents who think I'm a cow because I've had several kids go through the school and I've never done it but that's because My point is the same as yours - I SEE NO REASON TO HAVE A CLASS REP! We managed fine without one 10 years ago And we could manage again now!

Oriunda · 15/12/2016 12:47

I'm a class rep. I've compiled a lot of class names/contact details - we have a lot of all class parties and I get asked for this list a lot. Set up a whatsapp group which is a great way to communicate e.g. 'anyone got my son's jumper after PE / save the dates for parties / chasing up rsvp / reminding people of things etc. We need to organise people for the rota for 'our' stall at fetes etc. Not everyone is on FB and a lot of parents work. Our PTA doesn't have FB or Twitter.

I've also organised the group collection. It was totally voluntary and I didn't specify an amount. Last year we didn't have a rep and I spent £10 on 3 bits of crap for 3 teachers/assistants (£10 doesn't go far between 3). This year we've got vouchers and a nice gift for all of them. Not everyone chipped in as some do their own thing and that's absolutely fine, but those that have seemed to appreciate someone getting it done.

I'd absolutely hate to think they were talking about me behind my back like this and thought I was on a power trip. Believe me, I'll be quite happy to hand over to someone else next year.

Cataline · 15/12/2016 12:47

As a teacher, I can say that my genuinely best gifts were the cards with a lovely note of thanks in. Or a cat mug. Or a tiny Christmas decoration.

Flip

1 2 ··· 6 7 8 9 10 11