Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think neighbours should come and collect their parcel?

264 replies

bibbitybobbityyhat · 10/12/2016 21:51

Dh took in a fairly large parcel (think box of wine size) for our neighbours on Thursday or maybe even Wednesday afternoon - I can't remember.

It has been in our narrow one person width hallway since then.

Aibu to be a wee bit pissed off now?

And

Wwyd?

OP posts:
carabos · 11/12/2016 09:32

Why is working from home regarded as a luxury? Confused I work from home a lot and it means that I'm always at work - nothing luxurious about it.

StiickEmUp · 11/12/2016 09:34

*Today 01:05 Ohyesiam

Wow op, if you get this upset about having a parcel in your hall, listening to the news must be torture, all that child poverty, suffering and destruction, exploitation and travesty of justice. It must play havoc with your nervous system*

Excellent

hooliodancer · 11/12/2016 09:37

I have just spent a week trying to chase a parcel.

It turns out it was left with a neighbour 10 doors away, with no note left for me! So I had absolutely no idea it was there.

I am really pissed off with UK Mail for this, but they really don't give a fuck. Ive spent ages on the phone to them. It's really frustrating.

DailyMailyFaily · 11/12/2016 09:48

Some posters seem to be making it up as they go along..

The OP said in her OP she was MILDLY pissed off

Do some posters really not understand what that means? I know it makes for a more entertaining thread to be imagining the OP as a frothing raging weirdo but to be mildy pissed off doesn't quite fit that story does it?

Unescorted · 11/12/2016 09:52

middle we have the same problem there are 3 addressess on the same road that are the same. It is just the village that changes. The drop down address finders don't include the village. Just Eat has made it worse.

What we have done is exchange email addresses / phone numbers so we can send a quick text / email to say hey Mr & Mrs Doplanger- Address we have tkaen delivery of your tat from wherever / wine box. We are in tonight if you want to come and pick it up or I will be passing on Monday if you want it dropping off.

For the take aways we direct them to the correct place....

GrumpyDullard · 11/12/2016 09:55

You aren't serious about the sign? You have no idea if the neighbours even got a card!

A few years ago, I was in the midst of a furious exchange with a delivery firm after they said they'd delivered a parcel but I hadn't received it. A couple of days later my neighbour turned up at my door with the large parcel and said, really angrily: "Are you NEVER going to collect this?!!" Really unnecessarily rude, I thought. Don't be that neighbour!

SorenLorensonsInvisibleFriend · 11/12/2016 10:10

Whenever I take in a parcel for any of my neighbours, I always check with the delivery person that they will leave a note. I've had my neighbours bring post to me that I've had no idea has been delivered and always feel awkward that I've put them out.

Otherwise, if I get a card I'll pop in to collect as soon as I can. If other people don't come to collect their post, I knock on their door after a few days. It's all pretty relaxed around here.

If the package is too heavy to take to them, maybe it might be an idea to write a little note saying, 'I have your parcel, but it's too big to bring over. Please can you come and collect as soon as possible?' to ensure they know. They may be waiting for it and be frustrated that it's not arrived. When they come to collect, mention civilly that you'd rather not be put down as an alternate delivery as it's becoming inconvenient to you. No nastiness required, just courtesy.

Original poster
bibbitybobbityyhat · 11/12/2016 10:42

Grumpydullard - the sign on the door will be for the benefit of the courier companies. If they haven't put a card through the correct recipient's door then why should I take in a parcel for them and finish off the job of being responsible for the safe delivery of the parcel?

If they have put the card through then the neighbours are being slack. Someone has been here at home continuously since it was delivered. Apart from maybe an hour and a half in the middle of Friday afternoon when I was out and the children were at school.

OP posts:
alizondevice · 11/12/2016 10:47

Why is working from home regarded as a luxury? confused I work from home a lot and it means that I'm always at work - nothing luxurious about it.

OP, I also work from home and feel your pain. It is an inconvenience to be in the middle of a conference call or writing up a report and having to interrupt everything because someone is banging on your door to deliver someone else's parcel. And if the same neighbour keeps using you as their defacto post collector, it can really make a person feel taken advantage of.

It's perfectly legit to leave a note on your door saying, 'Not accepting parcels for other addresses.'

I'm not sure why you're being attacked by some of the other posters. Anyway, YANBU as far as I'm concerned.

EBearhug · 11/12/2016 11:32

If they haven't put a card through the correct recipient's door then why should I take in a parcel for them and finish off the job of being responsible for the safe delivery of the parcel?

They can't put a card through until you accept it, if the card says, "left with neighbour at no. 23" and if the card doesn't say that, what would be the point of leaving the card? (This doesn't excuse any delivery person who leaves something with a neighbour and then doesn't put a card through with the original recipient to say where it is.)

Original poster
bibbitybobbityyhat · 11/12/2016 11:49

EBearhug - I think you're pulling me up for using the wrong tense in my comment about the card. I suppose I meant to say "If they can't be relied on to put a card through the addressee's door ..."

OP posts:
Wonkydonkey44 · 11/12/2016 11:52

This happened to us, delivery man handy left them a card despite telling me he would!

Cel982 · 11/12/2016 12:00

Right, prominent sign goes on front door tonight "Sorry but we can't accept parcels for no. XX".

You can't be serious... Why on earth would you want to be so rude to your neighbours? It's obviously not aimed at the courier firm if you're singling out one house like this.

I live in a little terrace of three houses and probably about once a week one of us will take in a parcel for another and then drop it round when we see their car is back. We've managed to do this for several years now without the slightest bit of animosity on anyone's part...

Memoires · 11/12/2016 12:30

Put a note through their door, saying that unless collected the next day you will open parcels and use the contents as you see fit. (I think it would actually be stealing if you were to do this, so don't.) It might make them scurry round.

Or a note asking them to pop round to discuss payment for storage.

Or a note telling them that you will now be refusing to take in parcels for them. Then put the note on the door telling delivery people that you don't take in parcels for no. X.

There are so many notes you could put through their door, my imagination is having a whale of a time, but on balance I'd do the last suggestion. Tell them you won't be doing it and then tell the delivery men.

And to people who say "why would you single them out like that?" it's for the same reason you would stop lending small sums of money to someone who never pays you back while continuing to lend small sums to people who pay you back quickly. Not hard.

malmi · 11/12/2016 12:31

Witchend, are you sure "Mr G" wasn't "Nr 6" ?

JassyRadlett · 11/12/2016 12:33

Grumpydullard - the sign on the door will be for the benefit of the courier companies. If they haven't put a card through the correct recipient's door then why should I take in a parcel for them and finish off the job of being responsible for the safe delivery of the parcel?

Oops, OP, you've tripped up here. If you were serious about this being your reason for refusing parcels, then logically your sign should state that you're refusing all deliveries from that courier, regardless of recipient.

Otherwise it does rather look like you are specifically targeting those neighbours because they have transgressed against your ideals of responsible consumption and, potentially, have failed to demonstrate psychic powers. That couldn't possibly be the case, could it?

Furthermore, YABU for living in a house that is apparently 6 storeys tall but only about 4 feet wide. Xmas Grin

keekaw · 11/12/2016 12:45

OP I usually say no to taking in parcels precisely because I don't want crap in my narrow hallway and I don't want the hassle of having the neighbours come round or -more often - having to go and redeliver the parcel myself. I take in ones for my nice neighbours because they come round and - shock - say thanks!

Like you I live on a terrace, have loads of neighbours and work from home. Each interruption breaks my flow and once the couriers know you are willing to take parcels they come round all the time.

You don't have to leave a note though - just say no a few times and the couriers will go elsewhere.

I'm laughing at the idea that because we are 'lucky' enough to work from home we should be a collection point for ungrateful lazy neighbours!

insancerre · 11/12/2016 12:46

I think the neighbours are still trying to pluck up the courage to gp and knock for their parcel
If only they had some wine to give them some Dutch courage

GrumpyDullard · 11/12/2016 12:51

Jassy - exactly! Xmas Grin

keekaw · 11/12/2016 12:52

I live in a little terrace of three houses and probably about once a week one of us will take in a parcel for another and then drop it round when we see their car is back. We've managed to do this for several years now without the slightest bit of animosity on anyone's part...

If you live on a little terrace and do this once a week, then it's not surprising that there's no animosity. The situation is different if you have loads of neighbours, several of whom get things delivered several times a week.

WorraLiberty · 11/12/2016 13:02

Memoires, or a note politely pointing out that the OP has a parcel for them, in case they're completely unaware...

hellejuice91 · 11/12/2016 13:14

I have already commented but after seeing what the OP has said to other comments I feel I have more to say.

First of all I would avoid putting a note on your door. You have to remember that it could create bad blood and once you start going down that path with a neighbour it is very hard to go back. There might be one day when you really need them to have your back and because of this they won't. It is obviously your choice but please keep this is mind.

Secondly a little nugget from my experience. I do about 8 large online clothes shops a year (not just for me) my partner works from home so most of the time he is there to collect. As he cannot sometimes go to the store (important meeting) I have agreement with the lady who delivers (it Is someone in her own car and the same person for years) that it can just be thrown over the back gate. Recently I ordered, knowing my partner wasn't going to be home, but thinking it was fine because our usual arrangement would stand. Turns out she was on holiday someone else delivered it and it went to the neighbours.

This wasn't my fault as a I had an arrangement. If a neighbour then gave me grief about it, I would be quite upset.

Memoires · 11/12/2016 13:35

Grin @ Worra Don't be silly, Worra, this is MN - and AIBU to boot!

SnatchedPencil · 11/12/2016 13:44

YABU. Either take the parcel round or at least let them know it is at your house. If you really don't want contact with them, just call the delivery company and get them to take it back.

ItsALLAboutMeMeMeMeME · 11/12/2016 14:01

Love this thread, it has everything. The OP, by day, a mild-mannered home worker but by night, the tragically misunderstood hero, sole protector of the uncollected deliveries of an unappreciative and inconsiderate humanity, battling the parcelforces of evil, undertaking arduous, intrepid expeditions to the front door, overcoming dangerous obstacles left in narrow passages, mounting a rearguard offensive against ninja foxes conducting biochemical warfare AND safeguarding mysterious wine-box sized packages.

Should be in classics.

OP, YABU but thanks for your self-sacrifice in refusing to accept that thus ensuring the continued well-being of this thread.