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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be quick about stuff?

215 replies

HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 06:45

DH's alarm didn't go off so he woke me up at 6.15 (I don't get up until 7) to make his sarnies.

It took me 7 minutes and I'm now back in bed with a coffee and my phone.

He is agog. Apparently it takes him a good twenty minutes and he is astounded that any human being can move so fast. He's calling me The Flash.

All it involves is buttering six slices of bread and slicing cheese and cucumber. I can't see how he drags it out for twenty minutes.

He made ds's lunchbox yesterday as he was off and the took him twenty minutes as well, 2 pate sarnies and a babybel, yoghurt, banana and biscuit.

When I decorate, it takes me a day to do a room, roughly. One coat in the morning and another late afternoon or evening. He's used to it now but it used to make him twitch.

Don't get me wrong, I am very lazy and will happily spend a day watching Netflix, but when I do get moving I like it to be speedy.

He also has half hour toilet trips but I'm not going there.

I think he's a faffer, he thinks I rush things. I say the results speak for themselves and my way is the best. If he would embrace my ways he'd have an extra 13 minutes in the morning to spend in the loo.

AIBU?

(This post actually took me ages because ds woke up and I had to make his breakfast and get him dressed, but that was a quick job as well).

OP posts:
TickettyBoo · 09/12/2016 14:56

I have a faffer too - and give him 2 jobs in a day and you'd think I've asked him to climb Everest!! 😂😂

NapQueen · 09/12/2016 14:57

Your dh woke you up to make him some sandwiches???

busyrascal · 09/12/2016 14:59

My dh is also an incredible faffer and it takes him ages to do anything because he struggles to prioritise and ascertain exactly what putting the kids to bed (for example) entails. He goes upstairs with them, I can still hear them larking about 20 minutes later and I go up to find him tidying their room Confused while they roll around on the floor with no clothes on...

Pigflewpast · 09/12/2016 15:21

Ah happiness, I'm another who is super efficient so that I can sit and do nothing. The odd thing I leave to do just before picking up the kids so that it stays clean (2 hairy dogs and a coal fire) til hubby gets home. This occasionally backfires when he comes home early and I'm sat with a cup of tea surrounded by dust and dog hair. He's not a faffer but he does make sure I know if he's done "a job" when I might have done same quietly 3 times that day ( washing etc) and wouldn't think to mention it.

HoopsandEverything · 09/12/2016 15:23

I clicked on this, read about the six slices of bread and wondered how long it would be until someone commented on it.

Heatherjayne1972 · 09/12/2016 16:20

Why the chuff did you get out of bed to make his sandwiches??
(Misses point)

engineersthumb · 09/12/2016 16:30

I'm a little suspicious of people who say they decorate in a day. Especially when they describe it as "a coat in the morning and a coat in the afternoon". No mention of preparation, filling rubbing down and not a hope of the woodwork drying in that time! Perhaps it means you can paint a room to your standards but doesn't mean you can decorate in that time.

Summerlovin24 · 09/12/2016 16:35

As.mothers we are so used to multitasking and have so much to do in any given day that we don't linger over tiresome chores. I can make chilli con carne with rice and veg in 20 mins. Boom..then everyone happy and I have brew in hand

MadJeffBarn · 09/12/2016 16:35

Opposite way here. I'm most definately a faffer. It'll take me all evening to do the dishes and laundry because facebook/tv/a magazine is much more interesting. In reality it wouldn't take me more than 45 minutes, but I somehow manage to make it last three hours.

goodeyebrows · 09/12/2016 16:37

It's like I wrote this OP. My DH is terrible and it's what we argue most over (even after 10 years) it takes me 35 minutes to get ready, 45 if I need to wash my hair. It takes him up to 2.5 hours! Angry I can't stand it

ginghamstarfish · 09/12/2016 16:41

Same here, not sure it's a male-female thing though, some people just do things in a slower and/or more methodical manner. If DH cooks he uses about 4 times more pans and things than I do, but he insists that each thing is vital ... each to their own.

Lweji · 09/12/2016 16:45

I notice it when getting in and out of the car park that I use daily. I often enter the park behind other drivers and park (within the lines, unlike some) and get out of the car much faster than them. The same as when leaving. I don't speed either.

Some people just really faff about.

PigeonPie · 09/12/2016 16:49

This thread reminds me of the wonderful Annie Tempest's cartoon 'The Male and Female Characters' or alternative title 'He makes coffee, She makes coffee' picture. DH saw Dicky making coffee and thought 'yes, of course', then he saw Daffy making coffee and the penny dropped!

SkaterGrrrrl · 09/12/2016 16:54

While I am waiting for the kettle to boil, I will, for example, feed the cat, wipe the counters and water the kitchen pot plant.

DH will stare into the middle distance.

The amount of time he takes for a poo is astounding. Why not wait till you're about to poo before going to the bathroom?

Anyone waking me up to make them a sandwich will incur wrath.

ByStarlight · 09/12/2016 16:59

Definitely the opposite way round in our house. DH is super-efficient and likes everything done as quickly as possible and on time. Me, I'm easily distracted and love a good faff!

In my defence, I think the reason I'm like this is that I want to enjoy the experiences of the things I'm doing rather than trying to get them out of the way as fast as possible to do something else.

For example, when getting DS ready for school each morning, we make the boring stuff, like getting dressed, into a game. I always read or make up a story for him while we are eating breakfast. I put music on while cleaning so I can sing along and dance about while doing it. If I had to do all these things fast and efficiently, it would spoil my enthusiasm for doing them and I'd feel like they were chores, instead of opportunities to find fun in everything!

DH finds this approach infuriating though. Sad

PurpleMinionMummy · 09/12/2016 17:03

Ohhh I thought this was just my dh. He can easily take an hour and a half to do 20 mins worth of washing up Hmm

fledglingFTB · 09/12/2016 17:11

Same here, pre-dishwasher (aka keeper of the peace) it's take him one and a half hours to do a full load of washing up, from say a few days.

Apparently I was speedy because I didn't do a "proper job" Hmm

oldlaundbooth · 09/12/2016 17:13

DH takes forever to do stuff.

So I just do it instead and then complain about the fact

HmmConfused

JustDanceAddict · 09/12/2016 18:02

He woke you up to make his sandwiches. Wtf? Has he not got arms?
Fwiw I get up at 6.30 to leave at 7.30 and have shower, make 2 lots of lunches, clear up, do face & if have time eat brekkie, then get two kids out of the house.

Original poster
HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 18:25

To be fair to him he woke up in a panic, realising he had fifteen minutes to get ready. I made his sandwiches while he had a bowl of cereal and then he went for his morning shit and managed to leave on time. He really wouldn't have had time to make them himself and it's not like he's a constant offender.

OP posts:
Naicehamshop · 09/12/2016 18:32

He wakes you up to make his sandwiches?? Hmm
Why do you allow him to treat you like this?

Naicehamshop · 09/12/2016 18:35

You really need to get a grip here op - he is totally taking the piss. If he doesn't have time to make them then he will have to go without - guarantee he will move a bit faster next time.

indoorfleece · 09/12/2016 18:40

I've found my people!

I've always had extreme laziness-motivated efficiency, anything my dp does is punctuated by 5.5 hours of Facebook and no thought for the next step of the task (e.g. Wait for kettle to boil, then realise he has to wash up cup). Unbearable!

Original poster
HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 19:02

He is NOT taking the piss.

He was off yesterday so had turned husband alarm off. He forgot to reset it.

He usually gets up at 5.30. He woke up at 6.15 and I was already stirring. I could hear him getting ready and asked if he was ok, he said he was really late and said is there anyway I could make his sarnies.

I said yes because I'm not selfish, it's no skin off my nose, I love him and he would do the same for me.

And then I've spent the rest of the day in my pyjamas lolling about while he was at work. He really hasn't done anything wrong.

OP posts:
Original poster
HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 19:03

Husband alarm Grin HIS alarm, stupid shitphone.

OP posts:
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