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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be quick about stuff?

215 replies

HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 06:45

DH's alarm didn't go off so he woke me up at 6.15 (I don't get up until 7) to make his sarnies.

It took me 7 minutes and I'm now back in bed with a coffee and my phone.

He is agog. Apparently it takes him a good twenty minutes and he is astounded that any human being can move so fast. He's calling me The Flash.

All it involves is buttering six slices of bread and slicing cheese and cucumber. I can't see how he drags it out for twenty minutes.

He made ds's lunchbox yesterday as he was off and the took him twenty minutes as well, 2 pate sarnies and a babybel, yoghurt, banana and biscuit.

When I decorate, it takes me a day to do a room, roughly. One coat in the morning and another late afternoon or evening. He's used to it now but it used to make him twitch.

Don't get me wrong, I am very lazy and will happily spend a day watching Netflix, but when I do get moving I like it to be speedy.

He also has half hour toilet trips but I'm not going there.

I think he's a faffer, he thinks I rush things. I say the results speak for themselves and my way is the best. If he would embrace my ways he'd have an extra 13 minutes in the morning to spend in the loo.

AIBU?

(This post actually took me ages because ds woke up and I had to make his breakfast and get him dressed, but that was a quick job as well).

OP posts:
SquirrelPaws · 09/12/2016 07:30

Oh yes, the bathroom. When necessary I can go from bed to ready for work in half an hour, including shower, make up, coffee and making DD's packed lunch. DH takes an hour just to clean himself. He's not that big or that dirty. Even his mates take the piss out of how long he spends in the bathroom.

Original poster
HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 07:33

Oh I really didn't mind. He does a lot for me, and he knows how much I value my sleep so wouldn't have woken me if he wasn't panicking about leaving on time.

I get epic lie ins on the weekend because he's a naturally early riser.

OP posts:
AmberEars · 09/12/2016 07:33

I'm with you OP. Better to do a job quickly to a mediocre standard than slowly and perfectly IMO. You get so much more done in a day!

AmberEars · 09/12/2016 07:34

My DH calls me slapdash.

DameDeDoubtance · 09/12/2016 07:35

Lost me at waking you up to make his sarnies, I'd be livid.

ChocChocPorridge · 09/12/2016 07:38

Arghg - this frustrates me too.

"I'm going to bed" he says. 45 minutes later he's still sitting there on his ipad.

"lets go shopping" an hour later he's still not dressed (let alone the kids)

"I'll get you a cup of tea" - 30 mins. minimum - if it ever makes it.

It's ridiculous. Why announce you're going to do something and not actually do it? If I say I'm having a shower, I get up and go and have a shower, I don't mess about doing pretty much nothing for 20 mins first.

00100001 · 09/12/2016 07:42

You'd be livid because your husband asked for help ONE time? Confused

Jeepers.

OP, I'd get DH to make his lunch the night before, that's what one died, as he has to be out the door by 6.30.

SquedgieBeckenheim · 09/12/2016 07:46

It's the same in this house. I do not know how DH can be so slow! I mean, what does he do that accounts for the extra time?

BertieBotts · 09/12/2016 07:46

I'm much slower than my DH at things. I guess you could call me a faffer!

I think you're right with the bored comment. But also, I don't really know how everything I do takes so long. It just always seems to.

KellyBoo800 · 09/12/2016 07:47

I'm with you OP. I leave at 6am every morning for work so shower the night before. I get out of bed at 5.45am, brush my teeth, put on some mascara, get dressed and am out the door in 15 minutes. DH doesn't leave til 9am but sets his alarm for 6.30 to be up for 7.30. It makes no sense to me how he takes quite so long to get ready and is wasting valuable sleeping time!

One thing I have noticed is that he HAS to listen to music on his phone. He will put Spotify on just whilst he's brushing his teeth and doing his hair. Which takes 20 minutes because he has made it a leisurely activity by putting music on! Madness!

BubbleGumBubble · 09/12/2016 07:48

You'd be livid because your husband asked for help ONE time? confused

It takes him 20 minutes to make a few sandwiches. Thats ridiculous. He is only asking for help because he is unable to complete a simple task in a reasonable time frame. My DP would go without or learn to do it quicker.
Sleep is precious and should not be interupted to make an adult a sandwich. Grin

junebirthdaygirl · 09/12/2016 07:49

I never got the connection between how l like to sit down and how fast l am at doing things before. When l was a sahm for a while l factored in one hour every morning for chores. The amount l got done in that hour was amazing. I had the whole day to faff around then. I always thought it was from coming from a big family where we had lots of chores from an early age but just had the revelation that it's the motivation to sit down that makes me be so quick!!

RachelRagged · 09/12/2016 07:52

Cheese and Cucumber sandwiches ,, now there's a blast from my past.

Not had one in years but now, OP, I think I will .

WouldHave · 09/12/2016 07:52

I get bored easily, but that's why I absolutely wouldn't drag out sandwich making as that would make me epically bored. As it is, I can really only do housework jobs provided there's a radio or TV on in the background.

carabos · 09/12/2016 07:53

I have found my people Grin. I've been saying for years that I get things done and out of the way because I'm lazy, not because I'm hardworking, which is how others seem to interpret it.

Working on a project abroad a few years ago, the director took me aside for a quiet word about recognising cultural differences- the way I was working was "making the local team nervous " and I needed to slow down, take the
unnecessarily long breaks and basically twiddle my thumbs a bit.

What I wanted to do was crash through my tasks then go sightseeing Wink.

BouleBaker · 09/12/2016 07:59

My DH is the same KellyBoo. Any activity has to be accompanied by a DVD, this often takes longer to sort out than doing the bloody activity would have taken in the first place, or he gets distracted by it and gets most put out if I point out people are waiting for him. Apparently he's never actually watching the DVD and it doesn't slow him down. Apart from the fact I see him glued to the screen for 10 minutes holding one sock in his hand.

Sunnie1984 · 09/12/2016 07:59

My DH is the same.

What is it with having to find to to watch/radio to listen to before getting in the shower?! Takes an age and wakes the whole house up.

Takes forever to hang the washing up... so i am ensuring he gets more practice Halo

GrumpyOldBag · 09/12/2016 08:00

YANBU.

I am approximately twice as efficient as DH and can get most jobs done in half the time. And better too.

toomuchtooold · 09/12/2016 08:06

DH went up to have a shower 10 minutes ago. He's just come back down still in his pyjamas Grin

I always thought that my training as a chemist gave me my organisational skills and sense of urgency (chemical synthesis is a lot like Bakeoff but with things that sometimes go on fire) but DH is also a chemist by training and it seems not to have rubbed off on him.

Inthenick · 09/12/2016 08:11

I'm lazy and economical with how I use my time but my God when something needs doing I'm like lightening. I prefer this style to the alternative!

mrscarrotironfoundersson · 09/12/2016 08:13

My DH has a permanent aura of being "busy". Always things to get done, never really 100% relaxes. I now realise from this thread that he's a huge faffer.

I make a coffee, drink it, put cup and spoon in dishwasher in 5 minutes.

His routine,

Open fridge, take out milk, close fridge.
Find a cup, select a spoon.
Fill kettle, boil kettle.
Wander off on his phone for 10 minutes.
Re boil kettle.
When water boiled, he then, puts the coffee in the cup, then the milk, then the water, stirs coffee.
Waves spoon about and then puts it down somewhere weird.
Starts to drink coffee.
Eventually puts milk back in the fridge.

It goes on. He's not an "incapable" husband by any stretch, things do get done properly, just so SLOW!!!!

RebeccatheOld · 09/12/2016 08:17

My DP is the same!

In the office I can do the work of two people in 3 half days, so I am freakishly fast but DP is slow by normal human standards I'm sure.

And I don't think he really faffs he just does things in a weird order. He's a highly intelligent man with zero common sense. When he does the dishwasher he will take things out of the dishwasher, dry them thoroughly again (they don't usually need it) then stack them on the side. When the dish washer is empty he will then put them in the cupboards. Completely infuriating to watch.

BoSelectaBigBiff · 09/12/2016 08:24

rebeccathe, I was just about to post about my DH emptying the dishwasher. I just can't bear to watch him. He too has to dry everything (even though everything is already dry) and takes each piece of cutlery out individually. It takes him forever. Me - 30 secs max. Grrr.

blueskyinmarch · 09/12/2016 08:26

This thread is hilarious because it is 100% me and DH. I am naturally a bit lazy so i zoom through tasks to allow me loads of time to loll about watching TV or reading. DH takes an age to do anything. It takes him an hour to get ready for working the morning and he lays out his clothes the night before and doesn't have to dry his hair or apply make up. I have no idea what takes up all the time apart from chowing through the largest bowl of cereal know to man. I suspect it is cutting up fruit that takes up all the time. Thankful i am never normally up to watch this. Too busy lolling in my bed.

ohtheholidays · 09/12/2016 08:31

I'm the same as you,when my Mum was still with us she'd come round once a week and watching me doing stuff she was always shocked at what I could do she started calling me wonder woman to me I'm not that fast but now my DH,my 5DC and my BF all agree with my Mum.

I decorated the whole of our frontroom in 4 hours the last time I did it and it is a large room and that was 2 different colours and 2 coats of each my DH was gobsmacked.

I find it hard watching anyone else doing stuff that can take them an hour when I could do it in minutes but I've learnt to try and bite my tongue now,I don't always manage it but I do try.

I'm planning on finishing decorating our hallway,painting the woodwork and radiators in the hallway,frontroom and bathroom,cleaning the bathroom and kitchen,7 loads of washing and wrapping tons of Christmas presents today before our DC get home from school.

Now if that was my DH he'd have the bathroom and kitchen cleaned,4 loads of washing washed(and 2-3 loads of that dried)and 1 radiator painted.