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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be quick about stuff?

215 replies

HardLightHologram · 09/12/2016 06:45

DH's alarm didn't go off so he woke me up at 6.15 (I don't get up until 7) to make his sarnies.

It took me 7 minutes and I'm now back in bed with a coffee and my phone.

He is agog. Apparently it takes him a good twenty minutes and he is astounded that any human being can move so fast. He's calling me The Flash.

All it involves is buttering six slices of bread and slicing cheese and cucumber. I can't see how he drags it out for twenty minutes.

He made ds's lunchbox yesterday as he was off and the took him twenty minutes as well, 2 pate sarnies and a babybel, yoghurt, banana and biscuit.

When I decorate, it takes me a day to do a room, roughly. One coat in the morning and another late afternoon or evening. He's used to it now but it used to make him twitch.

Don't get me wrong, I am very lazy and will happily spend a day watching Netflix, but when I do get moving I like it to be speedy.

He also has half hour toilet trips but I'm not going there.

I think he's a faffer, he thinks I rush things. I say the results speak for themselves and my way is the best. If he would embrace my ways he'd have an extra 13 minutes in the morning to spend in the loo.

AIBU?

(This post actually took me ages because ds woke up and I had to make his breakfast and get him dressed, but that was a quick job as well).

OP posts:
DropZoneOne · 09/12/2016 10:58

I have a faffer too. He just does everything so slowly. He took an hour to make macaroni cheese! I've watched him do things and it's because there's no logic to his order of doing things, so he doesn't see efficiencies. Plus he's just slower than me.

engineersthumb · 09/12/2016 10:59

Oo-oo going to 've goady! Many people spend more time trying to do the minimum than doing a proper job! The 'quick' people usually are content with a bodge that a 'faffer' has to correct later! Goady post out:)

WouldHave · 09/12/2016 11:04

It's partly the multi-tasking thing, isn't it? If my DH is cooking a meal, he tends to deal with each component one at a time, and wouldn't prepare one bit whilst another bit is boiling or under the grill.

PurpleNurple69 · 09/12/2016 11:11

He woke you up to make HIS sandwiches? I'd have lamped him one Shock

PurpleNurple69 · 09/12/2016 11:17

But still.....

CondensedMilkSarnies · 09/12/2016 11:20

I am bone idol and have the attention span of a goldfish . I do everything at breakneck speed so that a) I get the task done ASAP and can sit down b) actually complete the task before I get fed up and leave it half finished .

People think I'm amazing ! always on the go ,very tidy house , decorating done in a day etc.

If only they knew Grin

Lweji · 09/12/2016 11:21

engineersthumb

No, it's not about doing the minimum or badly. It's about doing things efficiently.

engineersthumb · 09/12/2016 11:36

Lweji
This is the crux of the matter opinions vary!

KatharinaRosalie · 09/12/2016 11:37

so much 'oh isn't he silly and useless, he he..' on this thread. Why would one handle 3 kids simultaneously, feeding one while dressing the other with the other hand, while their other parent is leisurely just getting himself ready?

Lweji · 09/12/2016 12:07

This is the crux of the matter opinions vary!

No, people vary.

Some people ARE efficient, others are just sloppy.

Mirandawest · 09/12/2016 12:18

I am a lazy faffer I think. I do things like set a timer and make myself work solidly for that time but at other times I just seem to waste time and I'm not sure where.

When I am on a mission I do things very speedily though.

IdBuyThatForADollar · 09/12/2016 12:22

Fucking come on then you goon.

I'd like this on a handy sign.

PaulineFowlersGrowler · 09/12/2016 13:20

My tribe! I am bone idle lazy but when I have to do something I do it at breakneck speed and to a high standard. Partner is king faffer. I always thought he was wilfully useless to avoid doing tedious jobs because he knows I will see red and take over. 20 minutes to do 2 packed lunches, it would take me 5. If he cooks dinner we are all chewing our arms off waiting for it. I've watched him, he just seems to shuffle around the kitchen appearing busy but actually doing fuck all. Also if I want something doing, I want it doing NOW (I appreciate how delightful that makes me sound, but it's more a case of getting things out of the way so we can relax, I'm not a harridan)...he does things when he's good and ready. Just do it now and then it's done and I don't have to ask you again in an hour. Angry.

My nan was the same, she used to time herself doing her chores, and each time she did it she would try to beat her best time. The rest of the day she would sit in her chair and eat chocolate eclairs, drink mellow birds and watch tear jerker made for TV movies.

AmberEars · 09/12/2016 13:57

IdBuyThat I love your idea of a sign! In fact I'd buy that!!!

Love this thread

Lweji · 09/12/2016 14:08

I assume when you are all saying you make sandwiches in 5 mins that would include putting everything properly wrapped back in the fridge, knife in the dishwasher, chopping board washed and worktop wiped down?

Yes.
I don't know about 5 min. The OP said 7. I'd say 10 at most.

At work and at home I tend to be very organised in that I always put things back in the same place, so that I don't have to look for them when I start.

MrsHathaway · 09/12/2016 14:18

DH can't possibly have a shower / wash up / etc at the same time as looking after the DC admittedly DC3 is a hellbeast.

I point out that he is sometimes away with work for weeks at a time. "How do you think I manage?!"

"I honestly have no idea."

Hmm
gincredible · 09/12/2016 14:32

I live with a faffer! I'm lazy but lightning fast and efficient at getting things done. My husband is a slow perfectionist who gets distracted easily by anything. It's taken meany years to be more patient with his way of doing things! He is incapable of speeding up even when running late. I take lots of deep breaths.

NovemberInDailyFailLand · 09/12/2016 14:39

My DH is the same. Takes him hours to do what I can do in minutes...I think it's because they have never had to snatch time to do a task!

ElectricPenny · 09/12/2016 14:40

Absolutely yy to all of this. I never made the laziness connection either, but it's definitely true. I'm not a haster, and like to do things properly, but just in a focused way.

Still crying about Fucking come on then you goon. Grin.

spiderlight · 09/12/2016 14:42

I have never in my entire life known anyone who does things as excruciatingly slowly as my DH. It drives me mad. I can have a full picnic made, the dog sorted and everyone dressed, ready and in the car for a day out in the time it takes him to find his boots and check the route on Google Maps.

NovemberInDailyFailLand · 09/12/2016 14:45

Yeah, what is it with men and 40 minute shits anyway?

FlappysMammyAndPopeInExile · 09/12/2016 14:49

It's obviously testosterone related. I can get showered and dressed in the time it takes Dh to fasten the laces on his shoes.

JellyTeapot · 09/12/2016 14:50

I too live with a complete faffer. I don't understand how it takes him five years to do the same job I can get done in ten minutes! If he's making dinner we never eat before 9, he takes twice as long to get DS down and it apparently takes a whole afternoon to vacuum three rooms. And, of course, half an hour to take a shit. Gah!! His time management is so shocking I'm amazed he can hold down a job!

FlappysMammyAndPopeInExile · 09/12/2016 14:51

My nan was the same, she used to time herself doing her chores, and each time she did it she would try to beat her best time. The rest of the day she would sit in her chair and eat chocolate eclairs, drink mellow birds and watch tear jerker made for TV movies.

Bliddy hell! I'm channelling your nan!

DustingOffTheDynastySuit · 09/12/2016 14:55

I can faff for the best of them when I feel like it. This has a tendency to make me late. This means I can move very quickly when I need to. Modern paradox, right there.

Kids and I all overslept the other week, got up at 745, we were out of the house on our bikes having had a decent breakfast and brushed hair and teeth and remembered the reading books and all the rest of it by 805. They are only reception year, so I was quite proud of them for that unexpected bit of dynamism.

DH got up the other day at 7 to do the school run and nearly missed his train because they still hadn't left at 810.