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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To plan not to have a Christmas baby?

357 replies

XanaduBubbles · 23/11/2016 07:04

My partner and I are going to start trying for our second in the new year, however I think that if we don't get pregnant right away (before February) we should wait until May to avoid having a Christmas / New Year baby, basically because I've known friends with birthdays around then and they always resent it (fewer presents, people forget, nothing to look forward to the rest of the year, total first world problems I know).

Aibu thinking like this? Am I just over thinking?

OP posts:
wifeyhun · 23/11/2016 07:26

I have two Christmas babies and they love having their birthday this time of year. I am an an August baby and I quite like that as well,

Original poster
XanaduBubbles · 23/11/2016 07:27

It's nice to know I'm not the only one! Of course I'll just be delighted to be pregnant again and everything's ok :)

OP posts:
AllMyBestFriendsAreMetalheads · 23/11/2016 07:30

I have a Spring baby and a Summer baby. I joked to DH that we should try for 2 more to complete the set Grin

NoahVale · 23/11/2016 07:31

i was the same, avoiding september and christmas. but oth if they had happened i wouldnt have minded. in fact dd november was meant to be millenium. but not necessary.

but agree, dont make a big deal of it as there is always someone who is sniffy

SaucyJack · 23/11/2016 07:32

It's up to you (and whether your reproductive systems want to co-operative obv.)

DD2 is mid-December tho. I think she quite likes it- especially since Frozen came out. There's always something nice going on on her birthday at school.

NoahVale · 23/11/2016 07:33

whyj dont you start now, ie august september

Thegirlinthefireplace · 23/11/2016 07:33

If you do decide to avoid those times, don't present it to others as because it's shit for the children. I had a friend who avoide conceiving Dec and Aug and said to me, knowing I have two with those birthdays, that it was because it would not be fair on the children. That's unnecessarily risking the feeling of people who did have babies at those times suggesting they were not thoughtful to their children by having them at crappy times.

bookworm14 · 23/11/2016 07:34

Not unreasonable, but do be aware things don't always work out the way you plan. I was very keen to avoid an August baby, then had two miscarriages and stopped caring about timings. Eventually ended up with...an August baby!

I was born in the new year, and don't remember people giving me one single present for both Christmas and birthday. It did sometimes make parties difficult though.

FRETGNIKCUF · 23/11/2016 07:37

I agree wth you OP.

But also agree about not telling anyone. You will offend people that find it difficult to conceive and people who have birthdays around that time.

SprogletsMum · 23/11/2016 07:37

You could look at it another way. I've got an August birthday dc and 2 November dc. I've been skint as anything since August because her birthday and uniform wipe me out, I just recover then it's 2 more birthdays then boom Christmas.
If you have a December dc it's over and done with in one month.

lalaloopyhead · 23/11/2016 07:38

You are not unreasonable to try and pls when your baby is likely to be born. I had 2 Christmas babies and its not a big deal to date, a but manic for me but not negative for the kids. I personally if id given it enough thought would definitely avoid a late summer born who would very young when starting school, as in my experience can be a disadvantage.

liz70 · 23/11/2016 07:39

Good luck to you if you can plan that accurately! I never gave the timing of my three DDs a second thought - first born in March, conceived a week after stopping the Pill, the second born July, fell pregnant on mini pill, and third born in August after three and a half years trying. No school problems as we're in Scotland, so she's midway through the ages in her year.

My DH is a NYD baby which in itself isn't ideal, but he doesn't seem to mind. No harm in trying to time, just so long as you accept that babies rarely come when planned. Good luck!

ticklemyonewhisker · 23/11/2016 07:41

My most successful friends have July and August birthdays. This really is a boring myth that has to be put to bed.

Buddahbelly · 23/11/2016 07:41

YABU To believe you get to pick and choose when it happens!
and just to add for all those avoiding august birthday's, My ds was born in august, he's second youngest in his class.

Hes the only one though to have skipped an entire reading level and bypassed the rest of his class. Being one of the youngest means nothing these days.

Dont present it as you dont want the children to be the youngest in the class because they'll be left behind, they all learn at different levels and after 1 year of trying to conceive I was just so happy he was finally here, couldn't care less when his birthday is (although its fabulous that he gets to play in his paddling pool on his birthday!)

canwestart2016again · 23/11/2016 07:42

FWIW my nephew has a Christmas birthday and loves it. He gets spoiled rotten by immediate and extended family who are down visiting over Christmas. He tells everyone when his birthday is with great pride!

HandbagCrab · 23/11/2016 07:42

My baby's due at xmas - I was more concerned about the task in hand tbh. Dc with xmas bdays I know have their parties a bit earlier or a bit later. Ds was born in November so winter babies are maybe our thing though! Best of luck. :)

Unexpectedbaby · 23/11/2016 07:42

I don't think YABU at all. I am due 8th January and am praying she doesn't come early. Don't get me wrong the most important thing is that she is healthy regardless but would rather her wait until Christmas and new year be over first.

Trifleorbust · 23/11/2016 07:43

YABU To believe you get to pick and choose when it happens!

Why shouldn't they choose when it happens? The OP doesn't think it's a right, she is just suggesting they stop trying at a particular point in the year. Hardly unreasonable for her to make decisions about her sex life.

Keepingupwiththejonesys · 23/11/2016 07:43

I don't think yabu but then again I did the same thing. With out first we started TTC in the new year, was lucky and fell first time so she October born, same story again with our second. This time we decided to avoid TTC until may as we wanted to avoid october, November, December and early January due dates. I'm expecting baby number 3 on the 3rd of Feb so all went to plan. We've been very lucky to be able to plan like we have though. I think if January had come back around and we hadn't yet conceived we would have just gone for it. I have a brother and a sister with December birthdays. Brother (14th) doesn't mind at all but sister (16th) doesn't really like it.

SeasonalVag · 23/11/2016 07:44

Forgetting about the Xmas scenario, its very nice having spring babies, you have months of decent weather ahead of you, don't have to keep them so wrapped up, everybody's happy....

PlumsGalore · 23/11/2016 07:49

Is this why there are so many birthdays around mine in April? I always thought it was an evolutionary nature thing, you know lambs, birds etc born in spring so they have better weather to grow stronger. Grin

When all along it was because it wasn't near Christmas, or close to the school cut off, winter germs etc

Sleepybeanbump · 23/11/2016 07:49

I can see your logic all other things being equal. I have a Christmas baby and while its special in a way I know it won't be fun for him when he's older. That said we're going to make sure he always has a proper party etc on his half birthday.

I'd only put any effort into this if you're comfortable 'missing' several months chance of conceiving. Have you thought how you'll feel of you end up this time next year still not pg? Will you regret waiting?

BarbarianMum · 23/11/2016 07:51

After 30+ years of hearing my dad complain about having a Christmas birthday (28th Dec) I was careful to avoid a Christmas baby - and ended up with one in late Nov and one in late Jan.

Redkite10a · 23/11/2016 07:52

August and July babies mean being 9 months pregnant in the middle of summer. I was due with DD this October and found this year's fairly warm summer hard going particularly as my work office is on the 3rd floor with no air con. DS was born mid January and it did make for a more comfortable pregnancy.

Thatwaslulu · 23/11/2016 07:52

I have an end of August child and whilst being heavily pregnant in a sweltering hot summer has its difficulties, it's also lovely to be able to go out for walks without having to bundle up like an Eskimo!