I appear to have been kon maried by my brother...

[frogsgoladidadidah]

We are rarely in contact other than to wish each other a happy birthday. I live 1,000 miles away. He has done this to all members of our family now except our other sister.

I feel like slapping him around the chops with a wet fish!

If my sibling sent me this I'd be worried if they were OK.

Is there a back story? Is this completely out if the blue?

What on earth?!

Also, I love that the first message asked about the Hatchimals. You'll be getting orders OP!

What a weird message! Who else has he sent it to?

Weird!

Has he messaged you this by mistake and it was meant for someone else?

It's true then, that no good deed goes unpunished.

Is he in a controlling relationship as you've said he's done this to others?

Goodness I almost thought we had the same brother then! Only a few months ago my brother randomly sent me the same themed message telling me he had decided I was a constant letdown and disappointment and he wanted to cut me out of his life. He wrote a koad of other out of order crap then concluded his cheery msg with 'do not tell our parents'.

Firstly, I'm not perfect but I'm definitely not a rubbish human being which he accused me of. Secondly, our parents invite us all for dinners at least every few months so does he expect us to sit in silence or just be fake friendly during said dinners??

My brother is himself developing into a horrible human being (on an emotional level) and thrives on drama. He was also regularly saying things to imply I was myself the horrible person and it was damaging to my self esteem. I don't like drama, lies or being made to feel like shit so he's actually done me a favour as I no longer need to be drawn into it nor suffer his lying deceitful ways...I'm free!!!

Sorry to hear your brother has thrown this crap your way. It took me some time (approx 2 minutes...haha) to realise mine had done me a favour. Hopefully you will be able to reach a similar conclusion or at least feel at peace with it.

Heman "because you ate my breakfast cereal in 1993"

My brother sent me a cheery text a few months ago telling me he'd spent his life thinking I was spoiled rotten and a bad person but - lucky me - he'd had a rethink & wanted to be bezzie mates now.

I assume he was oblivious to how that sounded.

So brothers & weird texts about their sisters unsuitableness as relatives seems to be a thing.

He sounds a woooss.

Who has recently come into his life that would believe all his issues are caused by his family?

And they have probably advised him to do this.

I think I would ignore it and not reply as that is more irritating for him as he doesn't then know if you read it and doesn't know if you passed it on to others.

I'm so confused

Id send back 'fair enough'
He will be back soon enough

WTAF?

I'd just text back "ok"
Short sharp and to the point.

i'd have been very tempted to reply with "it's ok - i know all about the hatching eggs!"

sorry - i thought the blue msg was coming from him

Scientology or new wife?

I dared to object to my DB having an affair (spark had gone after 15 years, poor lamb)
which put me on a collision course with new OW.
I was exorcised because of a wall stapler.
Even asked to post it back.

Sadly my DB passed away unexpectedly shortly after and it was clear who had pulled the strings with his culling of the family.

Do you think this is actually him. Why not involve anyone else in this matter? Does he have a strange obsessive controlling partner who may have sent it from his phone and then deleted it his end so it looks like you stopped contacting him?

Bit out there I know and only you know of any untrustworthy back story and if your brother is likely to send this

I have a family member who sounds scarily similar.

I've gone NC with a close relative (for robust reasons I may add - not saying this situation is the same) and I just went NC. I didn't do a dramatic flounce. It's the text equivalent of shouting 'I'M NOT TALKING TO YOU' while following you around.

Block him and move on.

The language also feels a little culty - if it wasn't the opposite of their modus operandus I would suggest he'd been on a Landmark Forum 'course' or some other self-help bullshit.

I also think the language sounds a bit culty too. What a nob. I'd reply and say 'ok, I'm guessing that's a no oh the hatchimals too?'

I'd genuinely ask him if the message was even meant for you?! Seems a v strange response to yours. The only issue I can possibly see is that he's narked that the eggs aren't a gift from you and you are asking him to pay for them. But his response is a bit ott if that's your only "crime"!

Last time I had a message like that it was sent by the partner of my male friend, then deleted from his phone. He had no idea why I stopped responding to his texts. Turns out she'd done it to lots of his friends.

But if you're sure it's from him, I'd send it to your parents/siblings/whoever it was that he doesn't want you to tell. Why should you protect his twattery?

Wow, what an arse.