AIBU: There is a special place in hell....

[VivienneWestwoodsKnickers]

For people who....

Chew with their mouths open
Bite spoons or forks
Don't turn off the keypress noises on their mobiles. "beep beep beep beep beep" when texting

Unreasonable? I call those basic manners.

What about you? Who would you send to the firey depths of hell?

lighthearted post

People who park like twats.

People who don't understand the national speed limit on a dual carriageway is 70 (UK) NOT 60 

Also people who don't understand that it's 70 not 90.

Men who spreadeagle themselves, in the manner of a Roman Emperor, on public transport forcing others (pretty much always women) to sit on 3mm of seat to avoid touching their thighs

Vegetarians who eat fish or chicken.

Anyone that says 'going forward' or uses 'blue sky thinking'.

Moving on ......

People who only make themselves a drink in the office and don't offer one to anyone else!

Uncontrolled kids in supermarkets or on public transport

Those "adults" who audibly lick their fingers while eating.

People who eat more than their share of the cakes or biscuits that someone else has brought in and who never, ever buy any.

People who talk at the cinema and specifically the woman who talked loudly to her son all the way through a musical I took my kids to last week as an early Christmas present and then moved son (who had kicked my seat rhythmically for an hour) because "the woman in front is very tall and has very big hair". I'm 5"2 and have alopecia ...

For people that manage to read 52 books a year. Read War and Peace in week, tell me what it is about and then I will be impressed.

Do fuck off Yvonne

Joggers/pedestrians/people with buggies who sail past without so much as a "ta" when I've taken the trouble to stand to one side to let them past.
People who don't pick up after their dogs.
Drivers who pull out in front of me when there's nothing behind me for miles, then drive at 10 mph below the speed limit and brake for every corner, every car coming the other way, every leaf blowing across the road...
Cyclists who ride straight through red lights and across pedestrian crossings. Either you're a vehicle or a pedestrian - you can't have the best of both worlds.

People who refuse to pay at the pump despite using a card (this includes dh) why?!

Oh dear I do this !

People who sit down beside me on the bus and take up so much of the seat I'm nearly squashed up against the window.
People in cars at traffic lights on Bluetooth. Yep, I'm standing at traffic lights listening to your amplified conversation...riveting stuff!
Mainly all of the above, but I'm guilty of the coughing and sniffing as I've got a cold at the minute......a cough gets so much worse when u try to hold it in. So a big sorry to all the people beside me, in the queue at lunchtime today.

People that let such big sneezes that I actually jump (my brother), also if someone lets a big sneeze directly behind me I worry where the snot went.

Road users who do not acknowledge you when you let them out into traffic or to pass!

I have too many to list, I agree with all I've read so I'm definitely not very tolerant! Hate bad eaters, hate people who text and drive, especially on the motorway!!! Noisy eaters are gross. Equally to people stopping when they get off an escalata are people who walk through a shop door and just stop blocking the entrance/exit. Nr to where I live, people who get into the left lane clearly marked turn left only because they don't want to queue them they shove eight actually causing said queue grrrrrr

People who constantly refer to their parent as 'dad' etc when he's not there. He's not my dad. He's yours.

Those who obviously stick a bag on the seat next to them on a tube /train or bus ( I try and avoid both of these as they have special place in hell, and drive) then give you daggers if you ask them
to move the offending bag aaaarrrggghh!

People who have been queuing to pay for ages but then still look astonished when they have to get their purse out, take ages finding it, then take out a stack of about 50 cards which they slowly shuffle through.

Those stupid fucking purse bells that some elderly women use. They are oblivious to them, so I don't see how they would serve their supposed purpose, yet they annoy the fuck out of everyone else. Also, a friend who is a police officer told me that there is anecdotal evidence that all they do is alert purse thieves to vulnerable targets.

Parents who ignore their children while playing on their phones.

People who say lickle instead of little. Also, any baby talk between adults, especially on social media.

What is a purse bell - never heard or seen one

They're a couple of loud, jingly bells that are attached to a purse. The idea is that if someone attempts to steal your purse, the jangling bells alert you to this. Unfortunately as the bloody things tend to jingle at the slightest movement, the user tends to become oblivious to them (especially if like someone I know you're rather deaf!)

Thank you Fortitude - I'll give them a miss too - would hate to sound like I belonged on an Alpine pasture when out shopping'

People who cannot put empty toilet roll holder in bin and leave it above toilet, last time I looked this little tubes did not have eyes and legs therefore they cannot navigate themselves to the bin, yes I'm looking at you dp

poppy. . I'm inclined to suggest googly eyes and pipe-cleaner legs!

One from this morning - people who take a wedge of scratch cards to a supermarket till to be 'checked'. They are scratchcards- if you can't figure out whether you have won without the assistance of a cashier, don't buy them!

Same theme - people who buy scratchcards and then scrape away at the counter. Have some fucking dignity and wait until you get home. Imagine buying a pregnancy test and doing it right there in the shop because you couldn't wait for the result. Self-control, people, please!

People who think because it's a woodland walk and their dog has shat six inches off the path, it's fine to leave it there.

People who pick up their dogshit, bag it, then hang the bag in a bush to collect on the way back.

Jess I'm so doing that off to hobbycraft I go