AIBU: There is a special place in hell....

[VivienneWestwoodsKnickers]

For people who....

Chew with their mouths open
Bite spoons or forks
Don't turn off the keypress noises on their mobiles. "beep beep beep beep beep" when texting

Unreasonable? I call those basic manners.

What about you? Who would you send to the firey depths of hell?

lighthearted post

All of the above, plus people who spray themselves with body spray etc. in Gym changing rooms. I've had a face full too many times. Also those who wear too much perfume. More is NOT better.

People who wear excessive scent on public transport. I've been known to get off the bus and wait for the next one if someone is wearing Joop!

People who DO pick up after their dogs then hang it on the nearest bush .
Who the hell do they think moves it............The Poo Fairy ?

People who stop in doorways. Move!
People who say 'people that', not 'people who'

People with poor grammar/spelling- omg reading some posts on fb/ selling sites requires a translator.
Loud chewing of food/gum
People who don't say thank you when driving and I let them through/open doors etc
People swearing at their kids especially the c word
Poor service at shops- a certain mobile phone shop ignored me 3 times once, needless to say I never shopped there again
People who always seem to move the same way as you so that you either end up dancing with them or you end up swearing at them in a loud whisper to f'ing move
Low riding trousers-just wtf?
People with no personal hygiene- how long does it take to wash your pits and put deodorant on? Come on!!
Slow people whether walking or driving
People who got their driving licence from a cereal packet

The fact that I've not really had to think hard about this worries me, I never realised how angry I was lol

Work colleague if you came in on time, didn't do your online shopping, phone/text your friends/family and got on with your work maybe you would get finished with the rest of us instead of moaning you have to work late again, also leaving your coffee cups and lunch dishes in a sink of hot water overnight does not clean them as it is not a miracle sink that keeps the water hot for me to plunge my hands into freezing cold slurry in morning looking for a teaspoon and no a slab of chocolate and half a packet of biscuits every day is not diet food and stop singing along under your breath to every song on radio I can still hear you (Another Yvonne????)
Ooo I feel better now

Nose picking - child or adult - makes me want to vomit
Putting fingers in mouths after the picking - actually do vomit

When my DMIL tells me to "just smile!" when I'm extremely depressed over something crucial and I've confided in her about it...

Alternately, when my DFIL asks me a question, understands my reply, but then asks my DH the same damn question to verify...

Facebook friends who call a certain US political party's voters vile names, apparently unaware that you and mutual friends have voted for him/her (I'm a Yank in the UK). The other day we were called "soulless man-hating ". Classy!

People who try to get on trains / London underground before I and others have have got off.

The same with lifts - let people out, then there is more room for you.

And apparently people called Yvonne. It's really funny I have just realised a neighbour who pissed me off no end is called Yvonne.

donald trump .

In no particular order:-
People on public transport who chew gum loudly,usually with their mouth open.
People with pushchairs who try to barge in through the back doors of the bus without letting people get off first.
Queue jumpers who get stroppy/act all surprised when challenged.
People who stop dead in front of you in busy streets,shops or at the end of escalators.
People who walk right on your heels,but won't overtake you when you slow right down so they can pass.
People who seem unable to buy anything in a shop without giving the cashier the third degree about it,when there are a dozen customers in the queue behind them.
Cyclists on pavements that ring their bell at me and expect me to jump out of their way. Nope it's not going to happen.
Able -bodied/young people on buses sitting in the priority seats who pretend not to see disabled,elderly or heavily pregnant passengers needing a seat.
People shouting on their phone on public transport/in cafes,restaurants or coffee shops.
Phew rant over! I'm not really that unreasonable. I just seem to be getting less tolerant to other people's shit as I get older.

Forgot one. People who insist on trying to convert me to their religion. No matter that I tell them that I disagree with organised religion generally,and that I am an atheist. They are convinced that they will be the one 'to change my mind'. I wish they would respect my wish to believe/disbelieve as I see fit. I wouldn't dream of trying to convert religious people to my point of view. I respect their right to believe in whatever they want. So please respect mine.

Nodding at most of these!
People who park badly.
People who dismiss ADHD as "naughty boy itis"
People who don't RSVP. Are you coming? I'm not telepathic!
People who claim to be allergic to certain foods but aren't.
Ditherers at the front of queues. If you don't know, step aside and let the next person up.
People who ask you what you want for your birthday/Christmas and then ignore your suggestion and buy something you don't like. Why bother asking?
People who moan that my toddler has made a little bit of noise in the church service when they themselves have sniffed, coughed, blown their nose disgustingly and fidgeted the whole way through. They do this a lot.
In fact any sort of double standard.
People who make the same joke over and over and wonder why you're not laughing. It wasn't funny the first time, never mind the fifteenth.
People who sit right next to the kids play area in a local café and then moan that the kids are playing. There's plenty of room further away.
I'd better stop, blood pressure rising to dangerous levels!

People who don't move down inside the train, no matter how many times they are told that the train won't move until you do.
Mouth breathers STBXH
People who question the answer you've just given them, especially when I'm in work.
People who dawdle
People who stop in the middle of the pavement
People who cannot walk in a straight line
People in general
Tourists

All of the above.
Plus Deputy head and head of infants who go on the sick as soon as ofsted inspection is announced and the HT who hands his notice in the Friday before half term they should all go in a special fiery pit.
My tolerance levels are zero at the moment.

Cyclists who wear all dark colours, have no lights or reflectors and cycle in the dark on unlit streets.

The asshat who set cursive writing for year 1's.

9 year old bullies who tell me how to do my job when I've been doing it for longer than they've been alive. Disrespectful little sod.

Stanley, isn't it just awful? I'm still printing for my year 1 group. The poor things can't read the text otherwise.

YouTheCat its so confusing for them, my son hates it he's a dyspraxic lefty and struggles to get anything legible or even on the page. Though he's very proud of the cursive 'g' he can do, they should enjoy learning not be put off by it at 5.

Cash point dawdlers.

People who stand RIGHT in front of the train doors as they open so you struggle to disembark.

The overuse of 'honestly', 'genuinely', 'literally' or 'no word of a lie' in ordinary conversation. I do not approach these banal interactions from a standpoint of scepticism - I believe you - no need to convince me of your integrity with these meaningless words.

People who dump litter in our beautiful countryside - should be forced to carry every bit to the nearest recycling centre;
People who start sentences with "So..." - just don't do it;
People who crunch apples next to your ear on the train;
People who, after you have stopped behind a parked car to let them through as they have the right of way, then stop and flash to insist you go first:
People who, when you politely say "how are you?" proceed to tell you in detail every cough and sniff they have ever had;
Glottal stops.

People who use thier mobile when u are blatantly talking to them and starting a active conversation, especially when they point blank refuse to put the phone away and continue to talk to you whilst staring at the screen!! DEEPEST point in Hell plz

Agree with Pictish (people who drive 40 in 60 zone), but continue to drive 40 in a 30 zone too, it's like their car can only do one speed, grrhh!

Teenage lads who wear a metric fuckton (scientific term, there!) of Lynx. As a teacher, it is the thing I hate the most. Somehow, they are oblivious to the overwhelming power of it.

I've taken to leaving every window and door open in my classroom when I'm teaching them straight after P.E.