To drink wine in the park?

[FlapsTie]

We've walked two miles to the good park. We stopped at the shop to buy the essentials (milk, water and wine). I have cups with me so the kids can have a drink. They've been in the park for an hour and we have another hour to go before DH picks us up.

Just how bad would it be to pour myself a glass of vino? I am bored shitless. Will everybody judge me and will I be an awful parent?

If it matters, the wine is still nice and cold. Although the plastic cup may mar the taste somewhat. I'm sitting outside the actual play park with the dog.

AIBU? Would you?

Well I didn't bloody know it was a thread posted by someone who had a problem. Thought it would be a splash into a cup while sitting on a bench.

I love a wine but I don't think I've ever necked a bottle before teatime. And I don't have kids, only baby dogs.

Flaps don't be so hard on yourself now.

Can you take yourself off to bed with a cup of tea and try to stay calm, I agree about leaving the thread if you're feeling really stressed.

OP, your husband is not your keeper. Why should he get your bank cards? No way would my dh try such a trick to me

He's the husband of someone with a self-confessed drink problem who is finding ways to prevent her buying (and then drinking) alcohol, not least when she's in sole charge of the children.

FFS, I know MN loves to scream 'financial abuse!!!' at any given opportunity, but can you really not understand why it might be wise to limit her access to money right now?

Good God, you are not alone mumsnet is teeming with us alkies Jess? Are you about? Sober warriors from dry? . Sorry to sound flippant but coming to terms with a drinking problem seems to go hand in hand with gallows humour!

Keep talking to us and we can help. Get yourself to AA too and stick at it. Do too work? How old are your children?

Oh, op

I don't work. Too mental. Kids are two teens and a five yo.

DH is amazing but I think he's coming to the end of his rope.

Go into rehab if you need to. My mother is an alcoholic and I have never fully recovered from my childhood and teenage years.

Right, after half term you have nothing to stop yourself getting to a meeting daily. You drive? Be kind to yourself but also be brutally honest. I promise the two can co exist!
Do not let this slide. Please , please keep posting here. Mn was the push to get me on recovery. Also try and be honest with why you need it. Many problem drinkers are self medicating. If it feels like a brand new can off worms discussing that, please pm me

Hold off the shelf flagellation. Talk to him, talk to your CPN tomorrow. Every day is a chance to try a different decision.

OP, your husband is not your keeper. Why should he get your bank cards? No way would my dh try such a trick to me.

Or he could decide he has had enough and leave with the kids. Clearly yiu have no clue about addiction.

The OP needs help, not telling she has a right to take family money, that they can't afford, to drink a bottle of wine while looking after the kids.

Op what support have you had so far?

Fucks sake. Clearly I meant self flagellation. Don't flagellate your shelves either though.

Also listen to the children of addicts. It hurts but it helps.
To be fair though, the thing that got me to seek help was my mortal fear of wreaking my liver. Not my beautiful dd. It kills me to admit to that bit whilst we're being brutally honest.....

Look at the support you're getting OP. Don't give up and don't be defeatist.

It's definitely self medicating. I can't drive (bipolar, they took my licence away) and I've tried aa before but hated it. There is a drug and alcohol mh service locally so I'm going to ask to be referred.

I can't keep doing this.

A cup in the park? Sure, no problem.

However, you do have a problem. So, get help asap.

Admitting you have a problem is the first step. So, good luck

Sorry to hear you're struggling OP. You sounded much better in some of your recent threads, and in more positive spirits. It's great that you're able to face up to your demons but please do be kind to yourself

Thank you all so much for being kind. I don't deserve it.

I get a lot of mh input, I see my cpn every week and go to group, the kids get a lot of support from Young Carers. I feel like I'm letting everybody down. Every time I make progress I fuck it up. I bought ugg boots and a radley bag this week, and justified them both. DH is working overtime so we can pay the bills. I'm an arsehole.

You've got to find the right meeting. I went to my first in Pimlico and felt like a scuzzy raggamufin!!! Full of male bankers on a lunch break.
I'm not religious either but find the right meeting and your sorted.

You can keep trying.

My family was dominated by my grandfather's drinking. Its really not ok. But He didn't try. You are trying.

You need serious help. Why did you hate AA?

I remember a thread that I am sure you wrote. Almost a reverse. Asking if we would leave our husband if he had mental health problems, alcohol problems, put on weight, couldn't work etc. Was that you?

Not surprised your self medicating. I was. Get yourself back to the go love.

Bruce, yes, that was my thread.

You are Ill! You're only letting everyone down if you bury your head back on the sand. Conquering addiction is fucking hard but so worth it.

My mother used to have issues with alcohol. Not a "classic" addict (she'd function very well, nobody would have guessed. but sometimes she'd get spitting mad, hysterical, mean and depressed).

So, please get help. I can't even start to describe in a simple comment how much her behaviour hurt me. It influenced me and my sister negatively.

Oh sweet pea . You can do this.

This thread is just so sad. OP, I hope you get the help you need and you can overcome this problem. Beating yourself up won't help. Do as you have planned and seek help.