Neglect or just crap parenting?

[selly24]

Leaving a child age 5 alone in house while running an errand taking 15 mins.
A friend seems to do this a lot. Not witnessed directly but from what parent had said eg ' DC woke up and I was on errand so was upset with me' and from what child refers to or assumes.
Eg when babysitting -' oh, why do I need to come when you go do X? Parent always leaves me here.
Was mortified when first heard bu thought prob a one off, as parent's OH was away, but seems to be a regular thing...am increasingly concerned. Should I be.?

A neighbour had social services involvement after leaving her ds 5 to go to the shops. Another neighbour called the police because the young boy was trying to escape through a bedroom window. The mother got back with the baby minutes after the police so hadn't been gone for long.

She must have been gone a fair while for the neighbour to notice the problem, realise the mother wasn't in, call the police and for them to come round.

zzzz There weren't other concerns, but admittedly I'm not sure how long the periods of time were for or how long it had been going on.

I'd still refer it to social services. It's their job to make decisions about these things. At the least they will talk to the mother about what is/isn't acceptable and offer parenting support.

Unless you were the child's social worker or actually in court, how would you know what the concerns were MissClarke?

Crap parenting and neglect. Poor child. Some shocking examples on here of why. It's inexcusable.

Intriguing. Was this part of your training or is it something you decided for yourself? Are there different responses to a 7 yr old? 9? 11? (I'm assuming 12+yr olds are not an issue)

No, not something I decided for myself hence why I used the word "obligated".
Any situation where parents/carers fail to provide adequate supervision and a child could potentially come to harm as a result is a significant safeguarding issue.

Neglectful, highly selfish and more than a bit stupid.

WTF would your 5 year old do, if you were unavoidably delayed whilst 'nipping out'? You could be knocked over crossing the road...be injured by a car mounting the pavement...mugged...heart attack...aneurysm... stroke...the list goes on.

Your 5 year old might decide to 'play' at cooking and fiddle with the cooker knobs...might decide to climb the bookcase and pull it over (an ex boyfriend did this)...might decide to 'follow Mummy' and escape the house...

Neighbour didn't notice when Mum left she noticed the five year old trying to climb out of the bedroom window and knocked at door to warn his Mum. Called the police when nobody came to door more because she was worried Mum was ill and unresponsive rather than believing child had been left tbh. Mum came back, within minutes of police arriving, with shopping from local shop so would have believed that she wasn't gone for long but long enough for the child to have been seriously injured.

I left my two for ten minutes or so at that five if they were watching tv or reading.

No floods, fires or intruders.

threads like this make me laugh. Obviously it depends on the child, what they are doing, and where you live, though. Do lots of you live in really dangerous parts of the world?

ChAnces of me being struck by lightening, mugged or knocked down round here are so remote that I am more likely to win the premium bonds and fortunately my cardiovascular system is up to the exertion of walking down a village lane with a dog for ten minutes,

Just no. I started leaving DCs at around 10 - midway through year 6 - for 15 mins or so to pick up the other child. At 5 I barely went to the bottom of the drive without them
Coming with me!!

Madeleine

zzzz - anyone working with children has a duty to report when they believe a child is at risk of harm. They don't have to be right about it. Social services have a duty to investigate.

Yes it's definitely neglect. Report it to Social Services, we all have a duty to protect children.

Do lots of you live in really dangerous parts of the world

It's not about percieving the outside world as dangerous. There are plenty of things inside the average home that could potentially be dangerous for a small child with no adult supervision.

Even if you live in a 'naice', quiet, low crime area that doesn't mean it's actually safe for a small child who decides to go wandering alone. Living in a middle class neighbourhood doesn't innoculate a child against being hit by a car, for example.

It's always '5 minutes' when they get caught, isn't it? But in reality, it takes me 10 mins to go and buy a pint of milk: 3-4 mins each way and a minute or two to get the milk and pay. I wouldn't leave a little child with no way of reaching anyone for that length of time. Totally different if I am in the back garden, because all the child has to do is open the bum door and there I am. If I'm in the corner shop, what does the child do if they're scared, or if someone knocks, or they hurt themselves?

Not the bum door - that's something else! Back door. Stupid predictive typing.

It's definitely neglect.

What crap zzzz.

If the worst happens and you do suffer an aneurysm, in your local shop and your 5 year old is with you, at least your child will also be taken care of. Rather than being left alone, at home, potentially for hours while you're unconcious in hospital.

If I'm in the corner shop, what does the child do if they're scared, or if someone knocks, or they hurt themselves?

Go to a neighbour?

Bullshit re hanging out washing in garden. You say to your kids - 'I'm just hanging out washing, come if there's a problem.' You're on your own property and the child knows where you are and will probably be watching you anyway. If you go out then they may forget where you said you were going, you won't hear them call for you and there's being waylaid by a passer-by or it taking longer. I was 5 in the 70s and I wasn't left alone at home so times haven't changed that much.

And if the neighbour is out? Or weird? Or just not answering the door? Knock on doors until they get help, whilst bleeding or crying or whatever?

They're not your neighbour's kids anyway - if you want them supervised, ask someone.