My nephew is calling his Mummy's boyfriend Daddy

[celeste83]

I wrote on here a few weeks ago about how my brother wants nothing to do with his child's family. Long story short his ex ran off with another man when she was 24 weeks pregnant. The child will be 4 in January and is openly calling his Mummy's boyfriend 'Daddy'. My brother is absolutely gutted by this. He says everytime he drops off the child to his mother the child asks his Mummy where 'Daddy' is? His Mother makes no attempt to correct him and just shrugs it off saying its difficult to explain to the child that this other man is not his Father. Is she being unreasonable here?

Can someone explain to me why it would be confusing for the child to be explained clearly that his dad and his stepdad arent the same?

Some people have given the explanation here that it contradicts what they are being told at home.

In my kids'case it was that at all. It was contradicting their experience of a situation and essentially their dad was telling them how they should feel and it didn't tally with how they did feel. Essentially he was imposing his view of life on theirs.

(In their case is was an ongoing pattern of sustained emotional abuse where how they felt was meant to fit in with ex's experience and feelings. They werent meant to develop their own)

celeste what are you posting for? Your brother doesn't want the current access to change. So what is it that you want to get out of posting?

I do however do not understand why at nearly 4 yrs old, where the child knows the first names of people in his life, why he can't be taught the first name of this other guy

I'm sure that at 4 yrs old he DOES know 'this other guy's' name. He's raising the kid.
What you mean is that you want it enforced that he not be called 'dad'