Thank you for all your replies, ive just finished reading them all.
Well my ex brought our 2 children back at 8, an hour late from agreed with no texts to say. I ididnt say anything though, when I opened the door I looked straight at my son with a big smile saying wow look how handsome you look! I didn't engage with the dad, I just shut the door.
I made a big fuss and asked do you like it? he nodded.
I later asked my daughter (not in front of my son) if Daddy had asked if he wanted his hair cutting, she said he did but * said no, but daddy kept asking till he said yes.
I wasn't happy. But im not going to say anything to the dad, like a pp suggested, im going to just teach my son to have his own opinions, he can do whatever he likes with his person.
I would just like to say to those who are saying that my son is old enough to know what he wants....although my son is 4 (just turned) he is developmently quite behind, and ive been advised to have a chat to our school SENCO about this.
To give you a bit of background on the dad, he has become quite controlling, he never use to be which is why I am still abit naïve over it all. He is forcing the sale of the home I live in with our 2 children, he demanded the car back we bought together, even though he has his own car and I had none.
With regards to the dressing my son up in dresses....I don't! I did say it was my daughter who just likes to play 'princess' and she is the one who asks her brother to wear a dress....if he says no then she doesn't push, but more often than not he will happily wear a dress.
I have never told the dad about that, My daughter said that when they are at daddys and she asks her brother to wear a dress daddy says no and she says well mummy lets us.
So what happens is when the dad comes to pick up or drop the children off, he starts to tell me what I can and cant do (all this whilst the children are still standing there)
The other week he told me our daughter told him that I let her drink apple cider! I couldn't believe it, I said she doesn't know what that is, ive never named an alcoholic drink to her, ive always called it dirty beer and that its for grown ups. But he seems to think that I give her cider....I don't even drink the stuff!
For the person who asked if the dad normally does 'parenting stuff' then no, he doesn't really, he doesn't take an interest in the children other than when its his weekend with them, during the summer holiday he never took them out, never saw them other that his usual times.....he has a fiance and she has 2 boys and he took them on holiday and days out....when he has them on a weekend he brings them back in the same clothes they went in. Don't get me wrong, he isa good dad, he was when we were together....but it just seems that now he has his other family his own children are being pushed aside a little.
Im just going to let him carry on with that, I never bad mouth him to our children or infront of them. When he starts to argue at the doorstep I always stop him and say not in front of the kids, if I call him to chat he never picks up his fone, he never replies to any texts.
Sorry for the ,ong post, I just wanted to sort of defend my actions a little. I DO realise I over reacted yesterday with the hair cut, and my little bou does look handsome still, its not tooooo short, and hes happy and that's all that mattes.
Thank you for your advice and opinions...xx