PIL drinking while babysitting

[PerditaNitt]

I left my 3mo DS with my inlaws this evening; this is the first time that my husband and I have been away from him for the evening and my PIL offered to stay at our house to babysit. They have looked after DS before for 2 hour stretches during the day very occasionally. I have just found out that while babysitting FIL has two beers and MIL also had a drink. Appreciate the volumes aren't massive, but I feel that any alcohol would dull the senses and slow reflexes, so should be avoided when babysitting. The baby was awake and very active this evening and would have required a lot of attention.

AIBU to feel disappointed?

• [Message from MNHQ - the OP's asked us to edit out a few details here so it's less identifying]

Relax! Good grief...

Did you and oh drink tonight?

Unclench please.

Nope, neither of us did (I'm BF so no booze anyway).

Two beers? I wouldn't care. I would care about significantly more if they were carrying the baby around.

Get a grip

It is fine!

They did bath the baby, so not sure if that was after the drinks (he is a fidgety little fish)

Yabu - I wouldn't say anything. I think an adult who has had a beer is perfectly capable of looking after a 3 month old baby.

I think they probably know their limits. Unless they don't in which case I wouldn't have them look after my child.

Thanks for the reassurance, all - not sure if I'm just being PFB about it all. I have a very low tolerance to alcohol, so even one beer would affect me significantly, which could be clouding my judgement.

I understand your concerns but it's not like they got absolutely hammered is it OP? Two beers means he could most likely still legally drive.

Just be grateful your Pil offered to babysit, some of us that to fork out ££ on babysitting fees.

YABU and you can drink and BF.

I agree with you op, I haven't had a drink in ages (11month old dd) and I easily get very tipsy on just one small drink.

But the thing that does it for me is- why do they felt they needed to drink while looking after him? Couldn't they survive without for one Friday night while they watched their gds? Particularly if he was active.

Yanbu

I thought you were going to say they drank 3 bottles of wine...... yABU.

First born?

I easily get very tipsy on just one small drink.

But that is you.

I doubt anyone would drink in charge of a baby knowing full well it would affect them so badly.

On a day in the summer in the park this year, my friend walked to the shops for ice creams and cam back with with two beers each. i drank them both with no effects at all and I've never had beer before.

I think FIL knows his limit.

Can see two sides to this - they definitely weren't getting hammered, just having a drink to relax. That said, agree with ollieplimsolls that I can't really see the need; i have a take it or leave it attitude towards drink (tea being my preferred tipple to relax)

YABVU.

You either trust them or you don't.

I'm also pfb op so probably not the best person to listen to. I also dont trust my pils to have my DD alone so that may cloud my judgement too.

I have a take it or leave it attitude towards alcohol and cant understand people who just have to have a drink. Especially when babysitting.

bummymummy77, thanks - reading your comment helps - I do trust them, and that is what matters

ollie so anyone, inc parents, should ever ever have a drink (not get drunk), when in charge of children, even when they are sleeping?

You must have in the first place to have left dc. I know where you're coming from, unfortunately in my case I still don't trust ds's grandparents (dh's parents) with him and they've never had him alone.

Don't beat yourself up about worrying though. That's your job.

They probably didn't feel the need to abstain because there's almost no reason to do so. Two beers is going to have zero effect on their ability to look after the baby. You are being very over the top.