What is the rudest thing a fellow parent has said to you?

[weresquirrel]

Another parent whose child is in my child's class made a comment about my younger child being ugly . It didn't register at first (I think I was in shock) and I only really took in her comment an hour or so after she had said it.

What is the rudest thing a fellow parent has said to you?

When DD was 3 weeks old l took her into work and my (female) boss said oh don't worry, she'll probably grow into her nose! Thought that was bad but reading some of these comments maybe not!!

At the school gates, many years ago, from a mother I vaguely knew:'Ooh are you expecting another, or have you just eaten too many pies?'
Erm, too many pies.

People constantly make horrible comments about my baby ds's mop of red hair

One from my mum before I was born. Had just given birth to my Bo brother and he was sitting in his pram when local neighbour (not immediate) came up for a "looksy".

"Oh God, he's got RED hair...where the hell did he get that from? Must be the milkman...no, he's blonde...so who have you had an affair with?"

My mum calmly said "actually, my sister AND brother have red hair and my FIL had red hair" and walked off

A year later she was out with my brother and met same woman who was pushing her pram. My mum went over to see the baby and guess what...shock of RED hair and it was the woman herself that said "I have no idea where she gets the red hair from as there is NONE in the immediate family" my mum was very diplomatic and said she looked gorgeous.

When I came along it must have confused her even more as I was platinum blonde lol!!

I complimented a mum on her baby's gorgeous curly hair and commented that I hoped my own baby's hair would grow in soon (she was very bald on top) she said "yes she does look a bit like a baldy old man doesn't she?" I was gutted and snapped at her to fuck off. Rude bitch.

This one from my nan "you're so lucky to have such beautiful children, I can't believe how beautiful they are! You did pick up the right baby didn't you?"

'Oh! What are they going to do about the shape of his head?!'.

He's more Ant than Dec in the forehead department, but still gorgeous and definitely not in need of medical intervention ffs.

Horrified reading these stories but not at all surprised. Some people are out to push parents down because it's the only hope they have of elevating themselves. If you're someone who puts their and soul into parenting , then these spiteful individuals will zoom in on that and know it's your weak spot. Seriously I don't know if it's just the British stiff upper lip, (I come from Ireland) but it seems a lot of these comments catch the recipient off guard and they grit their teeth through it or are just too shocked to react. I'm quite offended in people's behalfs here! If it happens to me I will actually start laughing hysterically in the persons face and show them up for the pathetic bullies they are. Keep your heads held high and don't let these nasty cretins make you feel like you or your children aren't good enough. Just because they've got the power to put you down, doesn't meant they've got the right xx

And the remarks about babies with red hair!?!,
OMG red hair is BEAUTIFUL ! These people are being nasty for the sake of it. Jealous fools!!!

Some of these are awful, some people are so utterly thoughtless.

My niece and I had our pfb's 3 months apart, and her dd spoke a couple of months before my ds did. She told me later she was pleased he had started talking as she thought he was 'retarded or something'.
They are now in the same class and her dd requires weekly extra support which ds does not, so there clearly isn't much wrong with him.

When I phoned MIL to tell her we were expecting dc3, her response was 'Oh no!'
Her reasoning was that we had a boy and girl as they had told us at our wedding we should have, and we had somehow ruined it by having ds2. She tried to recover, I was gob smacked as I'd genuinely been expecting her to say Congratulations!

About unborn child.
Me: "Oh you realised I was pregnant!"
Colleague: "Yes, no hiding it now, are you going to find out what you're having?!"
Me: "Oh I already know, it's a boy, so I'll have three boys!"
Colleague: "Euurgh. Oh God you're kidding."
Me: "Oh...."

A few years ago I caught up for drinks with one of my best friends from my teen years who also for a while was my BIL. I had divorced his brother many years ago but nowadays we are FB friends and chat occasionally. We didn't have kids but he subsequently had a son who has disabilities whom he told me about. Whilst we were out MIL rang my ex BIL and the rat bag said "I'm out with Traf would you like a word" despite me saying noooooo.
Now I'd not spoken to this woman in probably not far short of 20 years ....... First thing the bloody woman says to me is. " is divorced again you know .....he has a retarded son " I couldn't believe even she could talk about her own grandson like that . I just said yes......he's told me all about him ........and got off the phone as fast as possible. What a cow.

People just speak without thinking sometimes.

I mentioned to a friend that one of my toddlers was seeing a consultant that week because we were concerned about possible autism. She said, 'Yes, my husband was saying he thought she might have something like that.' I felt like I'd been punched in the stomach. She meant no harm.

When our first-born was a couple of weeks old, my DH said casually, 'Sometimes I think she's disabled'. And did not understand why I was upset.

A lovely friend once came for coffee and said, 'Sometimes I worry that me and DH aren't coping as parents but then I spend time with you guys and realise we're actually doing ok!'

I was left disabled following the birth of my firstborn and was unable to care for her. Talking to another disabled mum of older children, I was told that she was glad her disability hadn't begun until the children were older, as 'caring for your baby is being a mum...because that's what being a mum is to a child that age'. She later apologised.

The other day a lady I babysit for and has kids at school with mine told me excitedly she was expecting. I said 'so am I'! To which she replied 'was it planned'? I was absolutely flabbergasted. I didn't know what to say so I just said 'yes, very much so'. Looking back I wish I'd added 'was yours?'

Oh, and a doctor at the hospital looked at my perfectly healthy child this week and said, 'his head is a bit big, isn't it? Does it always look like that?'.

I am now unspookable when it comes to my children's health and development.

I looked after my DS's 5 year old when his school had an inset day Took him with me to pick up my DC. Joining my usual group of mums in the playground, I said "This is my nephew". He buried his face in my sleeve, clearly feeling self conscious. He was taking little peeks out at everyone, and one of the mums said, at full volume "Has he got learning difficulties?" I said no, he's shy! She said "Has your sister had him tested for autism?" I said no, she hasn't felt the need to, and she said "It's just that he's got a..." then gesticulated that he has a big head, while he peeked out at her from behind my sleeve.

We were at at family wedding and a family friend came up to me and said "Is that gorgeous child with your DH your daughter?" Quick as flash SIL went "yes but she's not as gorgeous as my daughter over there" Family friend gave me this look . One of many times that SIL has put DD down - I tend to just ignore her

When out to dinner with the dh's best friend and his wife...
Dh's Friend 'oh we saw your dad yesterday Nigel-he looked very jaunty and said 'Hiya kid' it made my day' (my dad is 86 and amazing for it-and something of a legend-he's always coming out with odd catchphrases-'hiya kid' is one of them-he says it to everyone regardless of age and always has).
Dh's friends wife said 'yeah it made me feel uncomfortable-it was like, a bit Pervy'
About my dad
In fairness h's friend massively told her off and said she was talking nonsense. I never much liked her after that.

Absolutely stunned at some - in fact most - of these.

I had twins at 31 weeks and one died at 3 weeks old. An actual nurse said "At least you've got the other one" when they heard the baby had died

Well, not really rude, especially compared to some awful ones on here - maybe just thoughtless!
At a big garden party thing and chatting to some people. Had introduced ourselves in little group and I had pointed out DH. DS1 came running up, handed me something and ran off. He is the spitting image of DH and this man said 'Wow, there's certainly no question of paternity there then!'

Everyone (including me) nodded and laughed politely but afterwards I thought 'Actually there was never any question of paternity thank you very much!'

Good grief some of these are bloody awful. Mine are mild by comparison.

Friend commenting on ds energetic behaviour and obsession with Lego.
"You'll need to keep on top of that. Kids like that end up in prison."

MiL commenting on me only having full fat milk in the fridge.
"When I wanted to put on some weight I used to drink this."

Said to DD "My god, your feet are massive! What size are they?"
LOADS of adults said this to her.

When I was a SAHM.
"What to you do all day? You must drive yourself crazy finding things to do."
One of the things I did was regularly babysit her daughter after school and on public holidays when she was working😕

Is anyone else reading these and worried that they've unintentionally given offence in the past by trying to be polite/ positive?!!!!

To be told that my kids were" like those those off Children in
Need" because I was a single parent...

Ah, here's one from another angle! Many years BC, when working, a proud colleague showed me a pic of his toddler DD. I didn't have a clue about kids and didn't know what to say, but somehow "she's a little chump!" came out! I meant cute, but it all came out wrong. Understandably his expression clouded, and I cringingly started digging my way out! I didn't mean to be rude at all, but when it all goes wrong...!!!!! Now I have DS and fortunately have not so far been on the end of rude comments, but clearly this must be due to my gentle and passive "bulldog chewing a wasp" expression!!