To hate it when men 'joke' like this.

[KindergartenKop]

Maybe it's not always men but I've never experienced a woman who has done this.

So today I took DS1 to a charity shop. He picked two books at 50p each. I gave Ds a pound coin. The man at the till took the books and said, 'That's four pounds please'. Ds looked worried and the man said 'Only joking, it's one pound'. We paid and left.
I've had people say this sort of thing to me so often and it always beffuddles me and makes me feel stupid. Am I the only person who attracts this form of idiocy? Aibu to be pissed off that this man worried my son? It's not fucking funny!

I suppose I just got over it and that's how I've brought my DC up

Isn't that the same advice people are sometimes given when they are being exposed to sexist 'banter' etc? Get over it. It's a joke. It's banter. Don't get offended. They're having a laugh. Don't take it so seriously.

I agree that this 'joke' is not in the same league as that - as it's not a joke

• but having a joke at someone's expense is crap if you're the person who's constantly the butt of those jokes. It can make you feel insecure and having people laugh at you because someone said made a joke at your expense is crap.

I am sure many people on here have been the 'butt' of people's jokes - at school, work and at home and have been affected by it. To some people , they're being funny. To the person constantly on the receiving end, it's not funny.

I was the butt of people's jokes about my speech impediment. They thought it was funny to joke about it. How the fuck do you think that made me feel?

Being the butt of people's jokes because of your speech impediment is NOT the same as what happened here though is it

No - it isn't. I made that clear.

However , you said:

There's been many times growing up people have had a joke at my expense. I suppose I just got over it and that's how I've brought my DC up

I don't agree with that - and anyone who makes jokes at someone else's expense is not a nice person - IMO.

The person who was the butt of this joke was a child. I'm not sure why it's better or worse to mock someone for being young or for having a speech impediment .

Oh - and I've had plenty of people when I was young telling me to 'get over it, you're just too sensitive, it's only a joke;' etc when I have been the butt of someone's joke.

Basically, if your idea of a 'joke' is to make someone feel crap about themselves, then your 'joke' isn't funny. It says a lot about someone if they think that is an appopriate thing to do.

You may not agree with it but that's the way I am and the way my DC are

So if someone decides to make jokes about your DC and an aspect of them and that made your DC upset, you would tell them to 'get over it' ?

I would i
Only be bothered if it genuinely upset my child .

I suppose the thing is you never know who you're going to upset.

I would probably not make many jokes to a child under 4 as they are very literal minded and can get upset when they don't understand your reasoning.

My DC aren't sensitive in the slightest

Sensitive - the 'go to' put down word when someone gets upset by jokes / comments made about them. "You're just being sensitive. Get over it"

I don't think it was ever the intention of the charity shop cashier to make the little child feel 'crap about' himself.

I agree with navy much is down to personality. I wouldn't have spent a single second thinking about this daft non joke 'joke'

Some people would, as thread reflects, have taken it very personally on behalf of their DC.

Different personalities

Well I doubt we will ever get to a point where no one teases or makes 'jokes' so it is best to teach children how to deal with it rather than just hope it doesn't happen to them, because it will happen.
Can't see a law being passed to stop it.

And that is not what happened to the OP's son, the man didn't make a joke about him or any aspect of him

And that's not what I am talking about.

You said that you have taught your DC not to get upset about jokes made at their expense.

So you'd be ok with a child at school making jokes at the expense of your DC?

They aren't sensitive. Is that wrong now

Nothing wrong with not being sensitive. However, the 'go to' word when people get upset about being the 'butt' of people's jokes - at work, home, school etc is "Get over it, you're just being sensitive". It's a great way of dismissing and minimising people's feelings.

100% with wanderings on this one.

I can't see any part of making someone feel uncomfortable and unsure as being funny, and agree with Lweji when it was said it's a drip drip effect.

It's telling those who are uncomfortable/upset and get told to get over it that thier feelings are not important; and telling those who aren't upset by it that making someone uncomfortable is funny.

It is the same type of personality that does the whole 'Cheer up love, it might never happen' and I've seen that end up in a punch up. . ...

But you don't know what is happening in other people's lives, you don't know how a random child will react, whether they have SN or not.

So why not just treat other people with some kindest and respect (of course we'd have no AIBU then. . . )

How is that a joke? Jokes should be funny and witty.

How about bringing up our children to have some self esteem, self worth? If people make fun of you its their problem not yours

Yes - because having your peers laugh at a joke about your speech impediment really helps your self esteem

Such comments by people can make people feel crap about themselves. That's what bullying is. Drip drip comments - made by teachers, parents, peers - all comments that make people feel crap and useless about themselves.

I suppose we should all have 'got over it' and ignored them - it's our fault for being so sensitive to comments people make.