to ask what's the popular Mumsnet advice you think is bollocks? [edit: lighthearted added at OP's request]

[CoolToned]

Game.

[JerryFerry]

Take up Ceroc dancing!

Honestly, you are blessed!

[ImissGrannyW]

"it's because you gave him/her sugar/a poor quality meal, not cooked from scratch and dared to suggest this was everyday"

[DinosaursRoar]

Oh yes, no man is actually just being a dick, he must be having an affair.

[PerspicaciaTick]

The irresponsible fuckers who tell people with potentially serious pain or clearly poorly babies not to go to A&E because "A&E is for emergencies".

[derxa]

never go to a wedding

[BabooshkaKate]

Get a cleaner - but obviously only when your OH refuses to pull his weight.

[LikeDylanInTheMovies]

'Go non-contact' on the basis of a trivial incident.

'Book yourself a spa weekend and leave him to look after the kids'

• yeah because leaving your young children with a drunk and hungover partner who has neither inclination or mental faculties to look after them whilst you sit miserable and alone in a spa will be brilliant and sort everything else.
  

Landlord dragging feet over repairs? - 'get a workman in to do the work and get then send the bill to your landlord'

-Because once the tradesman discovers you don't actually own the house, but will be forwarding the bill to a landlord who has shown no interest in fixing the problem and in all likelihood they won't see a penny for their work, they'll be queuing round the block for that job. Plus it put the poor sod at risk from eviction.

'Check your partner's phone/email'

-As if this was a consequence-free course of action. I've never cheated, but if I found a partner checking up on me and monitoring emails/phone calls/text messages, it would finish the relationship there and then.

That you acquire rights as a common-law wife if you live with someone for a set period of time.

[leccybill]

I'm struggling to work around school hours> What about an au pair?

What about home schooling?

Love bombing as an actual non-joke solution.

[stitchglitched]

'You don't have an IL problem, you have a DH problem.'

Well actually sometimes maybe DH just loves his parents and doesn't agree with your assessment of the situation.

[Smidge001]

All the bloody 'get evidence' on those threads where the OH is having an affair. Why??? Just why? What's the point? If you think he's having an affair then choose to stay/discuss/leave. But what's the point of the evidence? You don't need evidence to choose to leave, you don't need evidence for a divorce. What bloody good will it do you to see proof of philandering, it won't make you feel better.

Grrr.

[TotallyOuting]

Yes ltb, no unless he is actually abusive, otherwise work on your relationship.

This doesn't come across too well. Why should the default ever be work on the relationship? People can decide they're better off taking a chance on someone else/alone without any justification!

[KeyserSophie]

Actually free half hour with a solicitor can be really useful. It helped me.

I think the problem is that often it's implied that all solicitors automatically offer this- as in, they have to. Most don't so if people don't check they could get a massive bill.

[mathanxiety]

'Have you tried telling him how you feel?'

[SchnitzelVonKrumm]

"Happy mummy = happy baby". Bollocks.

[BillSykesDog]

Anything to do with relationships. There is an absolutely shocking amount of projection on here.

[DocMcFanjo]

"Don't do competitive tiredness."
It is a competition.

YES! Thank you! I always thought I was being v unreasonable in doing this but you know what? I AM more fucking tired than he is!

[DocMcFanjo]

Ugh. Bold fail.

[Liskee]

Just pop baby in a sling.

No, this will not fix every baby related issue. Nor will co sleeping. Baby still wakes up every hour, now he's just closer.

[PageStillNotFound404]

99.99% of the advice to tenants facing eviction.

This! In fact 99.99% of the advice given to tenants in general.

[Rozdeek]

biscuit and liskee

Yes yes YES to fucking co sleeping and slings

[toastyarmadillo]

LTB
Here have my first
He's having an affair
Any spelling or grammar corrections
Any not very subtle troll hunting
When posters go through people's posting history to throw vague comments at them

It sounds like I hate Mumsnet, I really don't, I would be lost without it!

[Iwasjustabouttosaythat]

"Can't you just leave your baby/toddler with a neighbour?"

"I did and I turned out fine."

Sure you did...

[FixItUpChappie]

YABU to miss work because you have a sick child - you should have backup childcare organized

Because everyone has a spare nursery and non-working family who are able and willing to take your feverish children at the drop of a hat

[BillSykesDog]

Oh God. And everybody should take a day off sick every time they have a mild sniffle because 'spreading germs'.