WIBU to never go on family holiday again?

[MamaDuckling]

Loooong story but I'll try to keep it brief.

My family and I (10 in total, all adults except our two young DC) have for a long time done an annual villa holiday. This year I suggested that DH, DC and I would get a separate villa close to theirs as our DS is a very noisy early riser, and DD doesn't sleep through yet. My family LOVE to lie in and I foresaw problems with the kids spoiling everyone's rest. This suggestion was quickly dismissed, they all insisted they wanted us all to be together and of course understood that two young kids come with some noise.....

Fast forward and we are 4 days in, we have today been relegated to the crappy room on the ground floor (all of us, despite there being a more suitable separate room for 2yr old DS upstairs), because the noise is too much. We have done everything we can to keep him quiet but he's up at 6am and my family don't typically want to wake up until at least 10am (lazy arses IMO but I respect that we are all different).

It all came to a head this morning and I fell out with DB over it (himself expecting his first DC, ha!). He suggested we all decant into this one room. I have DD in travel cot next to me, DS on a mattress at the end of the bed, and snoring DH by my side. I am simply fucked off beyond belief.

WIBU to never do a stupid family holiday ever again based on our experience this time? I now just feel like we are a nuisance to everyone and wish we hadn't come at all.

Honestly DB is such a self righteous idiot sometimes....

'Don't gloat that you kept him quiet in his room for two hours, 8am is still too early on holiday'

IT'S OUR 'HOLIDAY' TOO, ARSEHOLE

YANBU, sounds hideous.

For the sake of sanity could you take turns downstairs with the little ones while one of you has a lie in upstairs? Would prob do you both good to catch up with your sleep. Or even get another adult to take them one morning...?

Just parent as you do at home, if this means peppa pig at 6am then do it. When they complain just keep saying, I told you so. I wanted a villa of our own. I'd also laugh at DB's every complaint and keep telling him, "Just you wait, your turn is coming very soon and then you'll eat your words"
Asshole.

Oh hell. Use the rooms you've paid for. It's your holiday, too, and your DB is being a total ass. As is the rest of the family if they think demanding you squash yourselves into one room together downstairs when there is plenty of space THAT YOU HAVE PAID FOR, just so they can have quiet mornings.

No, just no.

Tell your brother he's an ass, and you're looking forward to his apology after his child enters the world. In the meantime, your children are going into the room with bunks, and everyone can suck it up.

Well, the room we were in has been claimed by my DM and her husband so there's no going back. I want us all on the same floor at least, so crappy ground floor room it is.

Never again.

We will watch Peppa and Thomas and play hide and seek very loudly in the morning.

*hands OP a bag of kazoos.

Yes it is, so go back to your rooms that you paid for!

Your "D"B sounds like a twat. They insisted you holiday together, you paid equally, you use what you are entitled to. I would probably make the effort to pop out for a walk with a breakfast picnic, or a drive to somewhere nice (beach?) just to stop the awkward feeling of trying to keep quiet, but I certainly wouldn't cram into one room to appease the lazy gits. You can always suggest that they refund you for your share of the holiday and you will get a hotel!

Lugs, we'd been taking it in turns for a lie in (DH took himself off for a 4hr 'nap' yesterday).... But that's when it gets noisier, two kids, one parent, more noise.....

DB had the gall to suggest I should 'teach DS to stay quiet until 9am'

Fuck me he's in for a shock when baby arrives isn't he

Id be sending DS into uncle Knobhead every. single. morning.... But I'm evil like that!

Yes we could do the morning outing.... But we are reliant on the car here (by car I mean huge minibus that DM insisted we all share but funnily enough it's us parents that are lumbered with driving the damned thing). After a long night with DD, and a 6am start with DS, a morning jolly is the last thing DH or I feel like doing!

Thanks for the support everyone. Nothing like a good show of solidarity from M'net AIBU's!

May I suggest a holiday project? Get your DB on tape describing all this crap about parenting and have it stored and ready for when the shit hits the nappy.

I remember when I had my DD and my DB was an utter twunk, so bad that my lovely, mild mannered, always on the fence, vicar of a Dad, told me to just wait until DB had his first born and I could sit is smugness and poke his sleep deprived body as he tried to snooze. Actually he didn't quite say that but that was the gist.
Your time will come, just bide it and he will suffer... moo ha ha

I kind of hate your brother

Your brother will probably be getting his comeuppance when his kid is born. Fingers crossed he gets a non-sleeping early rising screamer. Then you can remind him ad nauseam what he said.

As for your DH, tell him that HE should teach DS to be quiet until 9, if he is so clever. Let him try it.

If you can afford it, see if any alternative accommodation is available for your second week and move out.

You do need space.

Oh, and when I flounced out after the shot hit the fan this morning (on said morning jolly of course), he called me a f@cking bitch. Yes I had got upset and shouty, but still.....

It was DB suggesting we teach DS to be quiet.... Definitely not DH!

Cause hell and then flounce to a nice hotel or go home. Why shouldn't you cause hell your family are bed stealing self centred dicks.

I look forward to your brothers plans to deal with sleep regression on fatherhood.

Urgh, he is a twat and an arsehole. Fuck that. I would ask for my share of the money paid and go home/elsewhere. I would also consider avoiding him in the future -he called you a fucking bitch!! What a charmer. How does DM feel?

YY to recording your DB for prosperity, do you have a smart phone? That would work

If I were in your situation and my DH wanted go home I'd have shoved everything in the suit cases and be sitting on the doorstep with all the passports in my hand waiting for a taxi.

Just pray he gets an active kid not one of those quiet, biddable ones.

If it's feasible to come home I'd just do that , sod whether it upsets anyone else .

Your brother sounds delightful and charming. NOT. If you can afford it, find somewhere else and escape. Another week in that atmosphere will be awful. We used to never get invited on family holidays as our children were notoriously bad sleepers. My brother's dc were better trained apparently. I've always hated holidays with other people anyway so no loss. And, as a pp said, now they are teens and early 20s their sleep problems have changed somewhat.

Sorry. I misread. I see it was your DB.

DB may well be in for a very rude awakening. You can hope so.

Holidaying with extended family is not something I would consider. Especially relatives who have never had kids.
So yes YABU.
No part of me would think it would be fun.

You should have booked a separate place, for sure. If your kids are up and making noise at 6am it's antisocial, and no one else should have to put up with it. Part of me thinks more fool your family for insisting you all share, but I think you also fail to see that it's perfectly possible to teach children to be quiet in the mornings and even, shock horror, that getting out of bed at 6am is not acceptable to anyone (unless you love an early rise in which case do continue).

Partner and I have had alternate lie ins at weekends since children's birth. Our babies were taught to be quiet, never mind toddlers and now the 5 and 6 year olds they are. Thet learned very quickly and do it quite naturally now. Kids emulate parents' behaviour - if you are quiet, speak in whispers, say daddy's asleep, they will do the same. My kids have also had a gro clock since age 2 and have learned not to get up before the sun comes up (we change the time at weekends to later times and they still adhere and play quietly until it's time to get up).

We don't have unusually easy kids. We have opinionated, strong willed, articulate kids who have simply been taught about socially acceptable behaviour. Do yourself a favour and teach your kids the same. If other people are in bed, you are as silent as its possible to be. Otherwise you are just plain selfish and part of this annoying generation of lax parents who think the world revolves around your bloody child and their charming idiosyncrasies.