To not want anyone else using our caravan?

[Welshmaenad]

I have recently bought a caravan (static) in a very popular holiday spot (well, I've paid a deposit and will be settling the balance when it is sited and ready). The money has come from my DDad who recently passed away. He and my mum, who died 2 years ago, always planned to get a nice caravan when they both retired, sadly mum died before she took retirement so they never fulfilled their dream, so thus feels like a special thing to do with some of the money I have been lucky enough to inherit from them. It's a very nice site with excellent facilities and the caravan itself is pretty swish, brand new and was quite expensive - not bragging at all but just pointing out that it's a significant and quite special investment for me.

I am already getting people commenting that they would love to stay in it and giving me sob stories about how they haven't been able to afford a holiday in ages, etc. I know it probably sounds selfish but this is something I am doing for my family, not to give people free holidays. My DP used to live in this area and his DC lives here so he will be using it as a base to spend more time with the DC; I intend using it frequently with him and my own DC, and my ExH will be using it in his weekends with the DC too, potentially with his partner and her child who I both know and like. And frankly that's as far as I want it to go, the second bedroom in the vsn will be the kids room and they will have their own bedding etc, we will be keeping lots of personal possessions there for ease, and I don't want all and sundry sleeping in it, poking through our stuff and so on. We may host friends whilst we are also there but I don't want others using it when we're not. When I've told people this they seem really put out and insinuate I'm being selfish.

I'm not, am I? I feel like I need to be really strict from the start or it will be a slippery slope and I will end up providing free holidays for all and sundry. AIBU in wanting to keep it for ourselves?

[AlpacaPicnic]

Look for WeAreEternals post... it's not far down the list but the whole thread is amazing...

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/mumsnet_classics/a1735637-Have-you-ever-encountered-anyone-this-cheeky

[expatinscotland]

'My mil has a touring caravan and always gets people asking if they can borrow it for a week. Erm no do they realise how expensive parts are to replace if anything gets damaged etc?! '

That's fucking unbelievable. Not to mention that you have to know how to property tow it (and if your license is post 1997, you have to have a special endorsement to tow most touring caravans), pitch it, etc.

'It's for personal use.' 'Oh, don't you think that's selfish?' 'No.' 'Haven't been able to afford a holiday for ages.' 'That's a pity.'

[rookiemere]

YANBU.
It sounds like you have lots of plans for your caravan so you go ahead and enjoy them and it's very kind of you to facilitate your exh's holidays with the DCs as well.

However I wouldn't be mentioning much to friends if you genuinely think they can't afford holidays. Not because you are obliged to offer it to them - you aren't, but just because it's probably best avoiding discussing it too much.

[exLtEveDallas]

We have a static on the SW coast. We only allow family to use it, and after the bathroom bin incident, only certain members of family at that.

Just say your site doesn't allow sub-letting except to named family members. It's a standard rule on many sites, ours included.

Congrats on your purchase, I hope you have many happy breaks there

[expatinscotland]

'However I wouldn't be mentioning much to friends if you genuinely think they can't afford holidays. Not because you are obliged to offer it to them - you aren't, but just because it's probably best avoiding discussing it too much.'

Eh? WTF? Why should she? In life, some people get and have things others don't. 'A friend's good fortune is a blessing.' If your friend can't be happy for your windfall, some friend. She got it because her mum and dad died within 2 years of each other. Anyone who begrudges her that because they can't afford a holiday is a twat, not a friend.

[expatinscotland]

'and after the bathroom bin incident, only certain members of family at that.'

Enlighten us!

[Zucker]

This thread sprung to mind when I read your post OP....
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2027892--to-think-this-is-a-bit-cheeky-or-do-I-need-to-relax-a-bit?msgid=47146034

Have no hesitation in saying no, it's yours! Enjoy it.

[ProseccoBitch]

YANBU. I'd feel exactly the same. Just smile and say 'yes we're so lucky' or something similar.

[ParanoidGynodroid]

I'm so jealous, OP, there's a lovely park very near us on the best beach in Britain (in Wales, of course), and I've told DH we must buy there. It'll never happen!.

They're expensive to buy, and there are huge annual fees. Why should cheeky freeloaders think they can have a free holiday at your expense?

"We're not renting it out, sorry" should suffice

[emilywemily]

Some people really have no shame do they! Stick to your guns OP and if anyone is pushy tell them to FUCK RIGHT OFF

[Chattymummyhere]

Sorry we put it on a non rental pitch so only us and people who can prove via birth/wedding certificates that they are close family are allowed to use it otherwise the site will kick us off.

True of a site in the east Anglia area. Most sites have some non rental pitches that tend to cost more so you are not near "the riff raff" as the sales team say.

[Chattymummyhere]

On costs
site fee's £2,356
Gas £250
Electric £98
Insurance £560
Drain down £25
Gas check £35
Electrical test £35

Some sites also charge water rates. Site fee's tend to go up a minimum of £150 a year, then you also have a change of name fee if you ever come to sell privately. Anywhere from 10-15% of sale plus Vat to a no matter what the sale price £5,000 and that's sites that allow you to sell privately.

[windmillsofyourmind]

Anyone who asks just tell them that you never know from one weekend to the next if the.caravan would be free because all the family use it....Im just amazed at people's cheek.

[Chattymummyhere]

Our site don't allow audible alarms. However I know from other sites there is an installation fee then a yearly fee of around £49-£99 depending on each site.

[RebelandaStunner]

YANBU or selfish. It's yours and a lovely way to remember your dps.
We do let friends and family use our holiday cottage, they never ask though!
But ours is rented out to the paying public as well. Only bugbear is people move stuff around, it's like poltergeists have been sometimes!

[RebelandaStunner]

Oh and if anyone suggests that you are lucky, remind them you have lost both parents.

[GnomeDePlume]

YANBU at all (as pretty much everyone has said)

A couple of thoughts:

I wouldnt even say it is for family use only. You will find some randoms claiming close kinship on the grounds that you played together and everyone said 'you were like sisters' when you were children.

Are you able to get the sort of locks where key copies cant be made on the high street? With a few different people having keys it would be all too easy for someone to end up with a copy.

[mumofblueeyes]

I've had the same issue but have just said it is against the rules of the contract for non family to stay in it. That was kind of true anyway :)

[exLtEveDallas]

Sorry Expat, I wasn't ignoring you, got caught up in a homework meltdown!

The very basic and not tmi bin incident was my mum letting a relative use my van after I'd said no due to previous shenanigans. I only discovered they'd been there after going down myself, cleaning and put my ungloved hand into the bathroom bin to discover unwrapped items my mother (and I) hadn't needed for a number of years....if you get my meaning.

and

Needless to say, they've never been again.