Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not pay for guest accommodation

201 replies

WindInThePussyWillows · 05/09/2016 17:08

Having a christening at our local church and a bit of a party afterward, approx 30 guests and 10 children.
We live in a relatively expensive town in the South where unfortunately hotels and b&bs are very busy so charge a fair bit per night.

A few uni friends who are coming have messaged me saying the hotels are more expensive than they had anticipated and would I be paying all/ a contribution towards their accommodation for the night.

They are live 2 hours away, no children. The christening starts at 11 and I imagine the after celebrations will end about 5.

After the cost of the party, cake..etc I just can't afford to pay towards their accommodation.

WIBU to say no?

I'd completely understand if they couldn't afford to come and aren't able to make it.

OP posts:
LaContessaDiPlump · 06/09/2016 21:49

I'm not surprised! What complete users!

Well done on being firm op Wine

EddieStobbart · 06/09/2016 21:56

Sorry OP, they sound like absolute dicks.

Every single action they've taken sounds the exact opposite of what a normal friend would do.

I think it's time to lose a few numbers.

expatinscotland · 06/09/2016 22:03

'They're not coming.'

Unsurprising. They were just trying to use you for free lodging. Twats.

Aeroflotgirl · 06/09/2016 22:07

No very cheeky and rude! If they can't afford it than they can't go!

ConvincingLiar · 06/09/2016 22:08

No loss there OP. Cheeky fuckers.

Aeroflotgirl · 06/09/2016 22:09

Just read your updates, they are no friends at all, you busted them.

Original poster
WindInThePussyWillows · 06/09/2016 22:09

Fuck em (I've opened a bottle of christening wine WinkWine)

Thank you I all for your support in this matter, I appreciate all the time you each took to tell me to tell them to do one! Wine all around!

OP posts:
NotMyMoney · 06/09/2016 22:13

They wanted to have a night out on you I bet they wouldn't of even been awake for the christening anyway!

Memoires · 06/09/2016 22:17

They are bonkers and very cheeky. I think any further talk about this with them you should take a very amused stance, and pretend you're not taking their suggestions etc at all seriously. So, should they come back with another cheeky suggestion, or a faux hurt how could you treat us so horribly you could reply with a Grin that's me all over Wink, or something similar. And refuse to take anything they come up with seriously after that.

Or perhaps point out that the reason you haven't invited them down for the whole weekend and to crash at your place is because it's a christening, not a hen night.

They'll get over it. The one you think is the tight arse may be whipping them into a bit of a frenzy.

JacquettaWoodville · 06/09/2016 22:27

I'm sorry, Op. At least they won't be hungover and throw up in the font...

JacquettaWoodville · 06/09/2016 22:28

I hope they weren't rude to you when they finally declined, but with their history. I suspect they were!

SisterConcepta · 06/09/2016 22:31

Agog again at the "friends" MNers have (see recent threads). Who asks their friend to pay for unnecessary accommodation when attending their children's christening?!?!

LyndaNotLinda · 06/09/2016 22:38

Wow - what a bunch of shameless freeloaders! On the upside, this is a brilliant story to tell the many friends you'll make in the future :o

I hope the christening goes swimmingly - you can relax now knowing there's no danger of anyone throwing up in the font Wink

1sttimedaddy83 · 06/09/2016 22:49

I'd do some research and send them reasonably priced hotels. I've heard about paying for accommodation at a wedding because we did it for my best man and a few other guests. Are they god parents?

Willow2016 · 06/09/2016 23:29

1sttime:
too late Smile
7 pages on they arent coming!

Not god parents just freeloading students who wanted a piss up on the saturday night at op's expense.

JudyCoolibar · 07/09/2016 00:28

So their interest in your child's christening is conditional on you paying out a minimum of around £150 for hotel rooms or providing them with beds for the night, despite the fact that they don't need either in order to attend the ceremony. You definitely don't want people like that at the christening.

Whocansay · 07/09/2016 07:07

What utter bitches! You are well rid of these freeloaders. I hope you have a lovely day without them.

Lizzy1978 · 07/09/2016 07:11

Yanbu. I would say that my budget unfortunately doesn't stretch to that & they are welcome to bring a tent and camp in the garden (assuming it's big enough).

TathitiPete · 07/09/2016 10:18

First of all I think the OP should cancel the cheque.

Secondly, well dine Wind for not allowing these freeloading chances take advantage of your generous nature. Asking is cheeky, insisting is unreasonable, pushing beyond two polite 'no, thank you's is grounds for reevaluating the friendship. And then insulting you by calling you ungrateful is the nail in the coffin.

Have a great time on SundayWine

Katherine2626 · 07/09/2016 17:29

How cheeky! (and there are stronger words for this behaviour, like 'free loading' ) Who do they think they are?

silvergirl267 · 07/09/2016 17:53

You've done the right thing no offering to pay, that was such a cheek. But things may not go back to how they used to be, and my be frosty at the very least or you may have to say good bye to these people.

LEIGH350 · 07/09/2016 18:00

Yes, and pay their petrol too ;-)

Craigie · 07/09/2016 18:08

Tell those chancers to jog on. Never heard anything so ridiculous.

ridingsixwhitehorses · 07/09/2016 18:11

Say no but welcome to camp in your garden!

jayne1976 · 07/09/2016 18:22

They clearly want a few beverages / uni reunion at your expense. Yes, we all moan at the cost of staying over at weddings etc, but generally (except in the odd mums net post) know we are responsible for our own accommodation -especially when you can be home by seven.
Just tell them that you purposely planned the day to accommodate those with a couple of hours to travel in mind and therefore expect the celebrations to be done by 5, (as its a family thing as well) and that an overnight stay will not be needed.