to move away from family to get out of privately renting? Really confused :-(

[Worriedwoe]

Thanks for reading and will try and keep this as short as poss!
We currently live in littlehampton near my mum.
My brother also lives nearby in a village and my elderly nan lives here too so all close family are here.
We have been privately renting for 12 years and have moved 6 times until this last " long term let " where we have been here 3 years and no major issues apart from a £25 year increase per year which is a bit of a joke considering the state of the property when we took it as it was hubby who sorted the whole lot out.
Anyway, fast forward to now.
2 children aged 4 and 2 and mother has been quite unwell recently after suffering a minor stroke but she is now recovered.
Brother offers no support and sees her about once a month if that even though he lives up the road.
I've always worried about renting privately as find it so unstable for the kids and low and behold we have been offered a 3 bedroomed house in Reigate from a local housing association on a " market rent " scheme due to one becoming available and my husband works in the area in a government job so he comes high on the list.
The rent is a bit higher than here but is set rent and contract is renewed every 5 years as long as no breaches so security is obviously there.
My mum is in bits, she doesn't drive and still works Monday - Friday so realistically it will become once a week and sometimes less if the kids have bits on and all the travelling is going to fall on me :-(
I will miss my mum terribly but my husband says I need to think of the children who need a home not a shell that they keep moving from.
What would you do?
All opinions gratefully received x

Sorry for some reason my reply didn't show up.
It certainly isn't nonsense, my nan owns a plot of land in Dublin which consists of 3 cottages and a lot of land which has been valued at £500,000. Mum is an only child and nan signed it over years ago to avoid inheritance tax however will never sell before she passes as it's rented out to family in Ireland.
There have been many an argument over the years about this as my mum was struggling as a single parent and living in a very rough part of east London in a towerblock yet my nan refused to help but these are her wishes and we can do nothing but respect them.
I think my mum would give up work to take care of nan if needed but at 90 years old she's fit as a fiddle currently!
I wish the landlord here hadn't offered us 3 years as would then be snapping this up in a heartbeat.
However, I think for the kids I will have to take the house.
My head is telling me it's the right thing to do, my heart not so much but maybe there are times when the head needs to rule.
Really appreciate the replies as this feels like a horrible dilemma for me even though on paper I can clearly see how easy this looks

Honestly you can't live assuming any kind of inheritance will come to you. If your nan is still in good shape at 90 your mum may well have inherited the long-lived genes, and £500k capital isn't actually that much to fund two successive long retirements.

You have to do what's right for you now, based on today's situation not on maybes. Even with a three year lease your landlord can still serve you notice. I'd go for security now, you might not get the chance again soon. And if there is no renewal at the end of five years in Reigate you can move elsewhere if you absolutely have to, overall you're less likely to have to move there than where you are now.

So it is 3 cottages with sitting tenants not a huge house with short term renters. I think you are looking at nearer £50k not £500k.

How much rent does your dm receive for the 3 cottages. How much does she rent the land out for?

The 3 cottages are 4 bedroomed each, there's also a farm on the land
It was valued in January for £500,000 although of course this might change by the time anything happens.
She doesn't charge rent, they are children of her sisters ( she has 10 ) who live in them.
It's all a mess honestly, but my mum would never dream of not doing as my nan asked and will wait to sell until she passes.

So sitting tenants.

I think you will find if she doesn't charge rent then effectively these properties are worthless.

Was the £500000 valuation if they were vacant possession or with the tenants in situ with no contract to remove them.

So what you are saying is this estate can only be sold when your dgm dies and when the family members and their children decide not to farm the land anymore. So in effect could be 100years in the future.

I don't think it is necessarily your dm who is stopping you providing for your dc.

Have the tenants been there for 12 years? You may find if there is no rental agreement and no rent and they've been in sole possession that they may have squatters rights to the property.

How when your dgm dies will your dm go about removing these family members from their homes.

I think a court will award them the farm and their homes until they to die. So many years into the future.

Had a similar experience when dps dgf died. He lived with a woman and her children. He left the property to his dmil. The court ruled the woman and her children had a right to live in the house till she died.

Presumably if your dm owns these properties she is the one who pays for insuring them. She pays the council tax and pays for repairs etc

If not then either your dgm has lied to keep her dd close or your dm is lying to you.

op font rely on your mother financially helping you out. She doesn't know herself what is going to happen in the future.

It's highly unlikely that the HA will evict a good tenant - because they are highly valued too!

You have a very good opportunity here to have a stable home life. Your mum will manage.

Good luck!

Good point about evicting a family of ten!

Just picked up on,

My dm would not dream of not doing what my nan asked and will wait to sell until my nan passes.

I think your dgm knows the estate is worthless and has dangled a carrot for her dd to stay close and look after her till she dies. It is only when she tries to sell the properties will the fall out begin.

Getva grip OP, you will never see any of tbe alleged 500k. A property is only worth what someone is willing to pay. In ireland, with sitting tenants, farming implications, tax your children will be looking for a house before anything changes and you will be left with half of not very much left at all (presumably your brother gets half?)

We lived in Reigate, it was lovely. We had to move because we couldn't get the children into any of the schools, not lucky enough to be able to use our religion as a reason our children should have a place when many others cant, and we couldnt find a house to buy that would fit us all for less than 750k and we could only stretch to 550k (there are no family homes in Reigate for 500,000, trust me)

and here you are being offered a family house artificially cheap, waltzing into a decent school and being able to live in a nice place where I, as an atheist, medium income earner cannot. And you're dithering! its actually quite entitled.

That's a bit unfair, schbittery - I don't think the OP has a school place there yet, given she's just heard about the opportunity.

OP, if your Irish family paid even half market rent on their cottages, your mum could have an easier life, perhaps working part time and coming to stay with you in Reigate more. It seems your nan is treating her sister's children better than her own, but your mum will be expected to care for her if it comes to that.

Shes been told there's space for her children at st josephs catholic primary school which is on the borders of reigate and redhill, near the HA properties i imagine, amounts to the same thing at the end of August.

Believe me the dynamics of my grandmother have been questioned for many years, but that is what she is like.
The property is there for Irish relatives until she passes.
The houses are in my mums name now to avoid inheritance tax and therefore squatters rights will not apply.
My brother is very well off and won't need or want money from my mum when nan passes he says ( this too of course could change )
It's all guess work though at the end of the day so I think we should take the property, and hopefully a housing trust will keep us on even if the market rent scheme doesn't work well.
Is £1150 for a 3 bedroomed house in woodhatch quite good then? From rightmove it seems to be but as I said, not familiar with the area and I know woodhatch isn't the best area in Reigate according to a few friends who work for surrey police.
They also have a 2 bedroomed house on the watercolour development in redhill but as we have 2 children I gathered the 3 bedroom would be more suitable long term.
I didn't realise Reigate schools were so over subcribed, it's obviously not like that in littlehampton!
But this year st josephs school in redhill went from a 2 form intake to a 3 hence the places left over currently

it doesn't matter whose name is on the deeds, if someone lives in the property and pays all the bills and pays no rent and has no contract with the person who "owns" the place then if it went to court then the occupier would be awarded the place over the absentee "owner"

Massively, massively over subscribed. Church schools of course that you can go to if yoor parenrs professed religion fits but for the rest yiu have to be a couple of streets away. they are opw ing a new school to try and address it and expanding all the schools to address it but i believe it is still very tight. My eldest when we lived in Reigate he had no reception place until the July and even then it was in a different town. We privately rented whilst trying to buy (gave up in the end and moved somewhere else) for 6 years ago and were paying £2400 a month, and this was 5 years ago. You are very lucky OP.

The people living there pay no rent but also none of the bills, my nan covers all of that out of her pension - maybe this is the way out if squatters rights? I know she's been with my mum to a solicitor a few times to ensure all bases are covered
Wow £2400 a month???
We currently pay £795 in littlehampton so £1200 is a jump for us but clearly is a great price rent if that's the herbal expectation in this area!

General not herbal!

Your gran out of her pension pays the gas, electric, council tax, insurance and repair bills for 4 x 4 bed houses. Either your gran has an amazing pension or some one is bullshitting someone.

Who then look s after the farm land and tends the cattle and pays for the hedges to be cut. Who pays for the electric bills and water rates for the farm segment.

You must take this house.

Even in the unlikely chance the housing scheme isn't successful then another housing scheme/authority will take it over. They won't bulldoze the houses and I doubt they would be allowed to sell them privately. There will be some agreement somewhere that they must be affordable housing/HA housing.

Your mum is being selfish, sorry she is. She needs to prioritise what's best for your kids over what's best for her.

She does have a very good pension as she was a doctor before retiring.
Upkeep is done by relatives but bills and so on paid my my nan