Why post online a photo of your ill child when you check in to the local hospital??

[MilnersGold]

Just why??? If you need help, your phone obviously works, text someone FGS

I don't understand it, my (older, preteen) DC would be mortified.

AIBU to think it is all about mummy getting attention, not the ill child.

Flame away

My child was involved in an accident a few months ago, required surgery and we knew he would have a visible (although thankfully fairy minor) injury for many months.
after the main relatives had been phoned, and the situation was dealt with (op done, awake and alert), we did post a pic of DC looking perky on hospital bed with a very short (upbeat) summery of events- certainly not attention seeking but rather, avoiding having to phone or talk directly to everyone about what was happening at a very stressful and upsetting time. The photo was really to reassure others that DC was actually ok.

Otoh I've seen plenty of the "check in at the hospital, are you ok Hun" type posts and they do grate a bit!

I call it Munchausens by Facebook and it's the fucking worst

Fancy and sirzy, if it were truly just an "online diary" then everything would be set to private. It's needy.

And what's wrong with being needy when you have an ill child? Is that really bad? Sitting by a bed of a child who is ill is very lonely at times. Realistically what is any Facebook/social media post but needy?

I tend to do it because people care but often I don't have the energy to respond to everyone's messages individually at that point whereas one status - maybe with a photo depending how he is - is quick to do to let non immediate family and friends know how he is and then I can respond to people at a later point when I am able to.

Vague booking is definitely the worst...as are the posts that start with 'soooo pissed off today' and the very passive aggressive 'some people....(angry face)'
Just stop it

Unfortunately I have spent many, many, many nights at a sick child's bedside over the past 10 years. And I can honestly say I never once put it on Facebook. toobusyoncandycrush Why would I? Really? If you really need to reach out to a group of people, why not do it privately on messager or WhatsApp? And I also find it really sad that people are saying their children, who aren't even old enough to be on Facebook, are wanting their pictures posted and the comments read out to them. I think that's a sorry symptom of social media gone mad.

Checking in at the hospital and posting photos of your kids when they are ill doesn't bother me.

Checking in at the hospital with a status saying "didn't expect to be here at this time of morning..." Then giving no details is blatant attention seeking. You might as well just post "I'm at the hospital, please somebody ask if we are ok PLEASE!"

I just hate vague posts.

Well I shan't post anything again. I sincerely was t aware that I might be upsetting my FB friends. To be honest none of them are close friends anyway as none of them stuck around over the years and I guess I know why now. I guess I have just been posting to try and get a small comment back to stop me feeling so alone and sad and desperate and I hadn't really thought about that as overt attention seeking but I guess it is and I feel terrible for doing it.

This thread really has made me sob. I really didn't realise how people would see me and might think it made me a bad mum when I try so hard to get it right.

I think you are taking this too personally Probably

People are saying they don't like the "guess where we are" statuses that never get a reply or get a "will inbox you Hun" reply. That is attention seeking pure and simple

Probably This thread isn't here to personally attack you. The people posting don't even know you and have never seen their posts. I would step away for tonight.

I think the key with FB is that for the most part, friends are just acquaintances. In fact before the days of FB the people we would mostly have on there are not people we would ring round in the event of something happening.

Yes people do have close friends and family on FB, but for the most part they maybe have 300 or so other acquaintances on there whose lives they don't even remotely follow and vice versa.

It's likely that if someone updates a lot about their life, people aren't necessarily irritated by it, they may not see it or may not even know the person well enough to pass some comment.

All the passive aggressive posts are annoying. Not just the "can't believe I'm at the hospital," ones, but equally the ones which read along the lines of "some people really need to grow up," or "just feel so awful," ones, I saw one this morning along the lines of the former and I have to say that the lack of any likes or comments was notable.

DS was admitted for almost a week when he was 3 months for failure to thrive. Didn't feel the need for a fb update. The following week a friend had posted a pic of his baby because she was ill. What the fuck's the point?
YANBU. Stupid, attention seeking and the poor children

I've had to post stuff on facebook before over an a and e visit. My son cut his chin on the concrete. Nasty gash. I couldn't get the pictures to him via text, so I had to put a before and after glueing picture. (plus an explanatory note for any facebookers that wanted to know what happened and why i'm posting photos).
Any "are you ok hun" comments were met with a "yeah, he'll live! - sorted now, his dad wanted to see how bad it was"

In the 1990s my dad dislocated his finger in all three sockets... it was literally zig-zag. Now that would of been a worthy facebook post

When DD was ill with her skin condition the most I did was check in and say positive vibes please. It was to let people know what was going on really and when asked I said it was her skin. I wouldn't post a picture as I don't feel it was fair on her.

Probably I understand. My son has been in hospital lots too and it's a very lonely time. It's not terrible or attention seeking, it really isn't.

Having seen this thread 101 times (OK slight over exaggeration) I have come to the conclusion that;

It's ok to do it if your life is hospital - you're a 'frequent flyer' and I honestly get it saves texting everyone individually. It means your good friends and family can support you easily and you can update at leisure.

It's ok to post pictures to show actually, everything is ok. Please don't worry type things. Even 'omg I'm such a doofus, in hospital again'.

What really, really grates is the checking in to a&e at hospital 'can't believe we're here again' and the oft quoted 'vague booking' to get attention, when actually all you're doing is a routine appointment or visiting someone else who is in hospital.

It is simply designed to seek attention.

Dd2 is going in to hospital tomorrow for a routine operation. Day surgery so all being well we should be home same day. If she does what her brother did and kindly decline to come round properly from the anaesthetic, no doubt I'll end up posting from children's ward to let all my concerned friends and family know. But I'll be clear about what's going - 'dd2 playing silly beggars and enjoying anaesthesia a little too much, alas we're staying in so they can keep an eye on her, should be home after breakfast'. on rather than 'omg can't believe we're spending the night! Hope to be home soon' which implies her op didn't go as expected, rather than its just a precaution to make sure she is ok.

Good luck to you and your DD2 Mini. One of my boys does that after anaesthetic but 2 of my others have had them and been fine so hopefully your DD will be the same.

Mini - I think your summary is pretty accurate!

For parents of DC with a longterm condition/illness, who post an occasional not too graphic or privacy invading update, e.g. "In hospital with X for another procedure, the docs are pleased with how things went, thanks for all your kind thoughts and messages" = OK

Parents of DC making an unplanned trip to A&E, who check in, post a sad face photo of child and something either very vague OR likely to worry people unnecessarily OR with far too much medical detail completely disregarding their child's privacy = NOT OK

I personally wouldn't ever FB from hospital or anything about my DC's health but I can understand how those who spend huge amounts of time in hospital might feel the need too. My original reply on this thread was a but harsh and some of the recent comments have made me think again. Sorry ProbablyMe

Isnt it what we've been saying all along?the vague status's and using an ill child for a hospital op by some parents in order to draw out, as some one earlier put it 'the Hun brigade' is quite frankly repulsive to me! I refuse to change my opinion on that

However as Iv said before there's a huge difference between those parents and the ones who genuinely feel the need for support and update and actually inform people of what's happening

This checking in and posting 'here we are again (sad face) ' supplying no information and ignoring concerned messages is simply for attention!

Hospital photo op **