Am I being precious over room sharing ?

[AgeofAdaline]

Name changed as this is very identifying.

I have 2 boys, DS1 is 12 and DS2 is 8. DS2 is autistic, he has a lot of sensory issues, his room is very much his safe/comfort zone.

Everything is colour coded or alphabetised, each toy has a day to be played with, if it's not the day then it can't be touched. He has a set routine when he enters the room or wakes up, things have to be done in order, blanket completely rolled off, then curtains pulled back etc

We have a four bedroom house, although the fourth room is pretty tiny, all it can really fit is a bed and a desk and small wardrobe, we use it as a guest room.

DSis' house is being fumigated because of bed bugs. Exterminators have said that it may take a month.

Her, BIL and their 4 DC, 3, 7, 13 and 15 years old have been staying with us for the past week as they can't afford a hotel and no other family members live close enough to BIL's work and the kids school once they open up again.

We're happy to have them as they would do the same for us, we moved DS1 into the guest bedroom, DH and I then moved into DS1's room leaving DSis and her family to share the biggest room in the house.

But 6 people in one bedroom is proving to be too much, oldest DNephew, the 15 year old has taken to sleeping in the living room.

DSis has asked numerous times, if I can put DS1 in DS2's room freeing up a bed for her eldest or for one of the other children who are currently sleeping on camp beds/mattresses.

I've said no, DS2 is already struggling to cope with so many people in the house, his routine has been massively disrupted, the amount of tears I've had this week has been exhausting, the weather hasn't helped as it's meant everyone has stayed indoors.

She asked again this morning when DS2 woke up at 7am, went down into the living room and started playing with his toy trains, as he's done every Monday throughout the holidays but it woke up DNephew who spent all morning complaining.

DSis then said I was being precious over the room situation. Which I don't think I am, she just doesn't understand how much DS2 struggles.

Wow, she can go elsewhere if she doesn't like it. Seriously. Her entire family has moved jnto your house and she's complaining you haven't given them enough of it? Your DS needs his space, needs his routine and he's having to manage a huge shift already. DN is just going to have to lump it. Another squeak out of her and I'd pack their bags for them.

Jeepers! YANBU!! How about the teenager nephew staying with friends, at least til the end of the holidays?

I haven't read the whole thread but your sister needs to be more grateful of the fact you are putting up her whole family.

I am also surprised that if the house is being fumigated and she rents it or it is being done under some kind of group insurance scheme that she hasn't been given vouchers to spend on hotel accommodation.

I have known quite a few people receive these vouchers.

But regardless of that your DS has a delicate balance and you should not mess that up for anyone, especially someone you are trying to help.

You are doing her a massive favour as it is, not to mention the risk of her family bringing a few bed bugs with them in their luggage.

Button boo. Just what is this powder? Isn't it toxic to humans and pets?

Benedikte2 we didn't have pets so didn't ask/wasnt an issue. Don't know about toxicity to humans but its not over everything, just around skirting boards, door frames, sash window frames and the on shelves, in wardrobes and cupboards, bed frames etc. I don't remember being told we had to be careful but it wasn't like I ran my hands over the shelf and then licked them!! I have no idea why I didn't think to actively check

The chemicals can be harmful which is why generally they are only used over a short term period such as three days for a very bad infestation. The harm is caused if ingested or person is allergic to an ingredient in the treatment. Hoping OP comes back to update as really curious about this month. Nowhere I have read says a month all treatment is in a matter of days.

Timescale seems more appropriate for asbestos removal.

Which would also make sense of them not being able to stay