To start an EIGHTH thread that no one responds to?

[VanillaSugar]

These threads, which lie empty as the night, remain unposted upon. Verily, you know what to do.*

*Don't post.

I can call AGL embarrassing names because I am his Mum

thomas

Muuuuuuuuuum! Stop itttt

mummy. I hate bloody BMI. Particularly that machine in Boots that weighs 'body fat'. Hello? They're called breasts...

AGL Sorry, son. At least I have the presence of mind not to do that in front of your mates. I was young once, etc....

Right Im off to do the scon run

Jess I am still reeling from the shock of my last Boots weigh-in. I've given up on home scales. So inaccurate.

Well my bmi is 23 but it was like 34 so I shouldn't complain. But I ain't getting weighed in boots. My fat is probably still huge. Im wobbly as fuck.

Oh, I'm getting a stress migraine.

And there's always some fucker other customer hovering behind you while you try to shield the read-out screen.

I mean look. Look at this. Look at this on my thread.

Ha my height gives me a good bmi

I've found my outfit for the wedding. I am invited, aren't I???

Course you're invited!

Vanilla. It's naicer than my rainbow dress! Am well jel never watched TOWIE in my life

Afternoon all! What have I missed?

being. Well, Thomas the Wank Engine for one thing. It sort of makes sense. He always has a smile on his face and is blue, possibly due to his bloody supply continuously being directed to 'other parts' (am clueless about Thomas' genitalia)

Well if we are talking suggestive vegetables then here is a potato

Have you seen the mumsnet recipe for 3 ingredient scones?

I don't think so?

Self raising flour, cream and lemonade! It's like the slow cooking Facebook group cakes.

Eh? And what's a slow cooked cake :S

Jess Mike says Hi

Thomas has always looked shifty!

Trying to get in the fat controller's good books.

Doing a Jess