To think that when you're using play equipment in the park it's rude for parents to stand next to you waiting for you to finish

[Qedwai]

I'm wondering if I'm the only one who hates this or if I'm being unreasonable.

When I'm in the park with my Sons and we want to go on something we play on something else until it's free and then quickly go on it once it becomes available. We don't stand right next to the parent and child waiting for them to get off! If we know something is really popular we will only stay on 5 mins so that everyone gets a chance to play.

One thing I've noticed consistently, is that there are a small number of parents who will stand right next to you with their child, literally waiting for you to get off the equipment. In the process, making you feel rushed and uncomfortable. Especially if they make a big deal of the fact they are waiting by saying stuff like 'won't be long now and you can go on once this boy has got off'.

Today I was in a large, fairly busy park and I put my Son in the swing. I had only just put him in when a woman went right behind me and said to her daughter 'we will go on once this boy has finished' she then proceeded to stand still, right next to me, with a grumpy face until we took our Son out of the swing'.

It's something I would never ever do. I think it's rude and unnecessary. Standing nearby is different but right next to the person is rude.

If a park is so busy it's necessary to queue for things I suppose that's different, but i'm not talking about parks like that. Just normal parks.

I know I probably am being a bit unreasonable but it's happened a few times now, and it's really getting on my nerves.

as I pointed out, it's not just me who thinks there are inconsistencies between what you have posted and what you think you have posted.

I don't care at all what you think of me (think I've already said that on this thread), and are you really sorry? Or was that a passive aggressive apology?

I'd still like an answer to the question I asked last night (but I suspect you'll side step again)

What is is about a 12 year old needing 1) a parent to stay absolutely by her side and 2) constant reassurance and calming about the simple social situation they are in that doesn't immediately suggest SN?

Because as you repeatedly said to me, addressing me in response to posts where I laid out that situation, that if I was unable (let's set aside unwilling for now since you seem to feel entitled to know random strangers medical histories) to actually speak to you and tell you explicitly why both my dd and I were behaving the way we were, then you would be perfectly entitled to assume we were just being rude as you couldn't know there were SN to take into account.

"I also don't like social politeness."

How on earth do you function in daily life?! Little things like queuing and saying thank you and social politeness.

^^ARE social politeness, not "and".

Pearlman you said you think a parent should tell you if their child has SN other wise you will think their behaviour rude if they explain how long their child should wait. Rather rudely, you repeated that view multiple times. I know you won't engage because you have no listening skills and suffer from terrible, disabilist views. I would expect nothing more from you at this stage.

Still posting, then?

Ds would probably get off a swing if someone was standing close to it because he doesn't like other children being close by. We don't go in busy playgrounds so I would probably say I would let them know when he is about to finish so they will be next on without having to stand right next to it. I wouldn't see it as them being rude.

Nothing I am saying is disablist
It really is. You're not even in a position to insist that nothing you are saying is disablist because you have absolutely no understanding of how disability affects people.

You refuse to entertain the idea that behaviour might be due to a person's disability in favour of the belief that they are being rude.
You also think that if someone wants to not be punished by you, they have to disclose their disability to you and it wouldn't have a negative effect on a child if the parent was constantly having to do that in front of them.

Your lack of recognition of the basic rights of a disabled child is truly shocking.

Yet you, who are not the parent of a disabled child, think that you know better about what is or isn't disablist, in total contradiction of every parent of a disabled child on this thread.
It stinks of 'I'm not racist but...'

Tiny bit unreasonable. My son basically plays with two pieces of equipment at the park so we wait our turn near them so he gets to go on the things he likes. Wouldn't have thought this was a rude thing to be honest.

Well noone can see them because they were deleted you mean

No idea what's gone on on the thread, but yes I do think it's rude.

It's a right pain in the arse when someone queues for something in a park and just makes me feel uncomfortable.

Which posts were deleted?

Well I can't as they were deleted.

Have I missed something, has OP had a name change to Pearlman or is this just someone on for an argument on someone else's thread?

Is this yet another thread where someone has made disabilist comments, which get deleted and they then say they weren't being disabilist?

Yes

Sometimes we wait near the play equipment, sometimes we don't.
Sometimes people do it when we are on the play equipment.
In either scenario I don't get fussed. I know what a reasonable amount of time is so it doesn't change what we are doing either way.
If the other person wants to get stressed about it, it's not my problem.

CBA to read whole thread. But honestly, a couple of visits to a park will teach you how to sort this one out. Take a beach tennis set, or a yoyo, or a soft ball that goes 'boiyyynnngg' when bounced, or whatever your child has fun with, and use those things to entertain the child while standing in the queue for the popular thing in the park. Sort it out, people! we are parents, and by definition, super-organised problem solvers. C'est simple, non?