To think that when you're using play equipment in the park it's rude for parents to stand next to you waiting for you to finish

[Qedwai]

I'm wondering if I'm the only one who hates this or if I'm being unreasonable.

When I'm in the park with my Sons and we want to go on something we play on something else until it's free and then quickly go on it once it becomes available. We don't stand right next to the parent and child waiting for them to get off! If we know something is really popular we will only stay on 5 mins so that everyone gets a chance to play.

One thing I've noticed consistently, is that there are a small number of parents who will stand right next to you with their child, literally waiting for you to get off the equipment. In the process, making you feel rushed and uncomfortable. Especially if they make a big deal of the fact they are waiting by saying stuff like 'won't be long now and you can go on once this boy has got off'.

Today I was in a large, fairly busy park and I put my Son in the swing. I had only just put him in when a woman went right behind me and said to her daughter 'we will go on once this boy has finished' she then proceeded to stand still, right next to me, with a grumpy face until we took our Son out of the swing'.

It's something I would never ever do. I think it's rude and unnecessary. Standing nearby is different but right next to the person is rude.

If a park is so busy it's necessary to queue for things I suppose that's different, but i'm not talking about parks like that. Just normal parks.

I know I probably am being a bit unreasonable but it's happened a few times now, and it's really getting on my nerves.

Oh yeah, none of this rushing people to get off nonsense. just standing quite obviously waiting but not...up the other parents arse..if that makes sense lol

Yes..fuck having awareness of hidden disabilities. Who needs to bother with that shit

Who is glaring?

People are just making stuff up now.

It's not me glaring, I've already pointed out that I can barely glance away from my child without causing a meltdown. But hey, making stuff up is so much more fun than actually stopping and examining your own behaviours and prejudices.

YANBU. It's unnecessary. I never did it and DS doesn't seem to have missed out on anything.

I don't know do I tbh.
It might be obvious to me at the time or it might not.
If it was obvious I would ensure my DC got off the swing sharpish and would make sure the 12 year old got on it before anyone else had a chance to hog it.

The main point is we just might not realise at the time but if we did I would hope any decent parent would ensure he got on without a long wait.

It sounds better if you're glaring Panda.

Let's add snarling too.

Absolutely horrible attitude. I hope you don't work in education.

Nope, not me glaring either. Too busy teaching my child some social skills. Oh and I have a smile for everyone in the park so don't tar me with your glary brush

You can recognise them in the classroom but expect to be told by randoms in public?

OP: I think you are being oversensitive, it's not all about you. When the parents are saying to their small child "it's ok, wait nicely and we will get a turn soon that is not them talking to YOU or belittling YOU.
That is them socially conditioning their toddler, who has the memory of a goldfish and needs to be reminded every 30 seconds why they are doing the Right Thing to wait nicely and not push your DC off the swing and take over because that is exactly what every three year old really wants to do until we condition them that waiting is the nicer thing to do

Yes of course if it's causing your DC to be upset why on earth wouldn't you mention it if it wasn't obvious to someone.

Absolutely, you are missing the point completely.

People don't want you to take your children off the swings because their children have SN's. They are perfectly happy for your child to have a go like everyone else.

They just don't want to be made out to be inconsiderate, passive aggressive, glaring helicopter parents because they wait beside the swings and reassure their children that it won't be long until they can have their go.

And they really don't want parents to deliberately longer because of some imaginary slight.

There is no need for people to explain themselves. Just have your turn and stop being so hyper-sensitive to what other people are chatting to their children about.

take longer.

Missed a word.

On the same note Pearl, why should these parents have to explain themselves all the time because some people are over-sensitive?

But you do understand that not every parent has a diagnosis and may just be parenting their child's needs? And you do understand that not every parent will react sympathetically on hearing that a child has additional needs and experience of this makes parents of children with additional needs naturally cautious in telling people that don't know in case they get an adverse reaction?

Can't believe this is still going! It is strange to me that some people have problem with kids/parents waiting for swings. I've never been to a playground where it doesn't happen. Of course there is an element of pressure if you know someone is waiting for something you finish up with it a little quicker than you would otherwise. If there is a queue behind me at the shop I wouldn't start engaging the cashier in conversation like I might if the shop was empty. What are people teaching their kids if they just continue to push them for 10, 15, 20 mins without even acknowledging that other people are waiting? I would say to my child 'just a couple more minutes now because people are waiting' - surely that's just polite? And if I was waiting with my child I wouldn't say anything but I would think someone taking ages while there was a queue was pretty selfish. Seems like the op just doesn't want it made obvious to them that they are hogging the equipment.

Mistress you are absolutely right and yes I have missed the point which I hope everyone now takes on board moving forwards.

"It will be your turn next" is not a passive aggressive comment.

It's right up there with "stop running up the slide" and "five more minutes" in terms of things you are likely to hear on a playground.

It is incredibly over-sensitive to assume that parents are saying this to rush you.