Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Protection built in.

Meet the Other Phone.
Protection built in.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To have recorded this and now be considering social services?

225 replies

MxJackMonroe · 12/08/2016 21:37

I went to a beer garden today with the boy (6) and the dog (on a lead, well behaved) to kill an hour of time.
I spent that hour listening to a 'woman' (looked like a teenage girl) growling at her kids, 2 under 4, shrieking, calling them fucking little cunts, snatching toys off them for no reasons, barking at them, encouraging them to scare the dog 'to see if he was friendly', as she downed pints and shots, and left when a drinks tray flew at my face and she came over to retrieve it...not to apologise, as I assumed one of the kids had thrown it, but to laugh in my face as she said "well they wouldn't fucking share it so I fucking threw it away innit." No apology. Laughing at herself for nearly clouting a stranger in the face with a tray. I'm usually quite ballsy but Jesus, she seemed insane and quite volatile, so, feeling extremely sorry for her kids, I quietly left.
I've just had a text from my bank to say my bank card has been fraudulently used. I checked my bag. My wallet - which was on the table in the pub garden, is not there. The little scrunge not only terrified my dog and threw a drinks tray at my face and screamed at her kids all afternoon, it seems she nicked my wallet too.
I'm meant to move house tomorrow. I need to pay £2,200 that I have worked my arse off for, to a letting agents at 10am. Luckily for me I can go to my bank with ID and get it out. Unluckily for her, I left my phone on the table recording SB playing with the dog (making cute memories to listen to when I'm down) and caught all her shit in there too.
First move, calling the pub to see if they have CCTV in the garden.
Second stop, if she can be identified, social services?
I am a genuinely reasonable, decent person. But Jesus Christ, this thing hit all my nerves today. And her kids deserve her getting some help.

OP posts:
Just5minswithDacre · 12/08/2016 22:17

Who goes to a pub to kill time a day before they move house?! Bloody hell.

I would. Easier to get to a nice beer garden than traipse to the centre if a large park and queue at the cafe for half an hour.

I'm getting ready to move now. I'll be finding reasons to escape the chaos at home regularly Grin

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 12/08/2016 22:18

Sadly I think this kind of parenting is very very common.

PersianCatLady · 12/08/2016 22:19

Wow do people genuinely just think I'm a dick?
No just because some people who themselves are being dicks are calling you a dick, it doesn't mean that you are one.

Just5minswithDacre · 12/08/2016 22:20

I think the idea to go to the police station in person with the recording is a good one.

You can explain the whole shebang face to face that way.

BillSykesDog · 12/08/2016 22:23

It's Friday, it's sunny, it's the school holidays, she has a 6 year old who has probably been stuck in the house while the packing goes on. I'm sure an hour letting off steam in a pub garden would have been nice for both of them if this hadn't happened.

wtfdidijustwatch · 12/08/2016 22:26

She is probably /hopefully known to SS already

This is why you should report her.
The information you give SS could be another piece of a very large jigsaw.

Once they have all the pieces they can act on it.

And to the person who said 'nice place to spend an afternoon in a pub'.
You need to get out more.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 12/08/2016 22:27

A recording is helpful but please to not leave out the bits about her throwing the tray and the behaviour you saw.

CalleighDoodle · 12/08/2016 22:28

Jesus the responses on this thread are unreal!

Op ignore all the ridiculous bored and frustrated people. Get some rest for your move.

bearleftmonkeyright · 12/08/2016 22:29

I am reasonably certain (but am prepared to be told I'm wrong) that cctv is now a requirement in every pub. So there should be some sort of evidence there.

PersianCatLady · 12/08/2016 22:29

That's rubbish Persian
No it is not, I have been told by the police not to film the kids under any circumstances.

The police were involved originally because of the criminal damage they were causing to my property but I have also witnessed from my window a 3 year old being left out in the garden alone in December wearing only a vest and pants and crying to be allowed back in the house. She was screaming and crying at the back door to be let back in and the mother was shouting "fuck off you little cunt, you can stay out there until you fucking learn to behave".

When I called the police the PC visited me after seeing the family and he said that the little girl had gone in the garden and the mother was looking everywhere for her and couldn't find her.

So I told him that this wasn't true and that I wished I had filmed what was happening for proof and he said what I stated above. He said that I was not the only person who had called 999 and that another neighbour had also called and that he was going to send a report to Social Services.

So it is true.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 12/08/2016 22:29

Wtfdid I had already said to report her, when I made that comment. Hth

RichardBucket · 12/08/2016 22:29

This is such an odd story.

You sit for an HOUR letting your six-year-old hear old hear a woman repeatedly saying "cunt."

You're using your phone to record sound... while it's in your back pocket, for "memories", even though it presumably has video facilities and could have been left on the table for clearer sound.

You leave a wallet behind and don't notice for hours (?).

Yeah, okay.

youarenotkiddingme · 12/08/2016 22:30

Only on Mn can someone come and ask advice about reporting concerns about a child's welfare and be told they shouldn't have been there in the first place!

Seriously I'd ask for a meeting with a police officer and ask to make a statement of the whole afternoon. The police should then ask for CCTV (pub can't show you due to DP) and investigate who tried to use wallet etc.

Good luck with house move.

NeedsAsockamnesty · 12/08/2016 22:32

persion

I am not doubting that a police officer told you that. BUT it is not true.

PersianCatLady · 12/08/2016 22:32

Why haven't you called SS persian? Just filml it and inform SS of it, if they say they don't have proof or whatever then tell them you've got a video. You can't get in trouble for filming out your own window FFS
I have reported it to social services and the police as have other neighbours. Obviously due to confidentiality neither of them can tell us what is going on but we have been told that the family are receiving "social services support".

After being told by the police NOT to film this family and the supposed consequences, I am not putting myself at risk of being arrested and losing my career and livelihood.

wtfdidijustwatch · 12/08/2016 22:33

fanjo I was agreeing with you.

Original poster
MxJackMonroe · 12/08/2016 22:33

richardbucket

Yes. Phone in back pocket, mic out. I'm a journalist. I often record sound like this as it makes people less conscious of being recorded.

And if I left every public venue that someone swore in, in front of my son, I'd never leave the sodding house. He's in his own world a lot of the time anyway. Please let me run everything I do past you in future though so I can meet your exacting standards if precisely how I should be living my life.

OP posts:
JenLindley · 12/08/2016 22:34

Just a thought, if the card security team know where the fraud transaction was attempted the police may be able to request CCTV of the shop/area and see who it was. Unless it was done online/via phone.

PersianCatLady · 12/08/2016 22:34

I am not doubting that a police officer told you that. BUT it is not true
That is exactly what I think.

fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 12/08/2016 22:34

Wtfdid..good, you know what's good for you WinkGrin

TwoLittleBlooms · 12/08/2016 22:39

That makes me really, really sad for those little children, some people actually don't deserve the privilege of children. There must be something that can be done? Maybe she is a regular at the pub, and maybe the landlord "knows" her? I would go to the police tell them about her and the way she was treating those poor children, and hopefully they can then try and find out who she is and step in with SS. I'm really sorry you had your wallet stolen as well.

WaitrosePigeon · 12/08/2016 22:40

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ for trollhunting. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

2kids2dogsnosense · 12/08/2016 22:41

hatwsummer

Obviously OP does - why shouldn't she? She was killing time and keeping a child and a dog entertained. What's wrong with that?

LizKeen · 12/08/2016 22:44

Nothing to add to the actual subject of this thread, but I am very glad to hear that you are moving. Hope the new place is nice. (And warm.)

Sounds soooo creepy writing that because I don't know you at all. :o

TearingDownTheWall · 12/08/2016 22:50

Report it. Even if they can't act on it, you have done what you can.
Good luck with the house move tomorrow.