Babies aren't expensive

[ImYourMama]

Hi all, I'm hoping you can help. I'm new to Mumsnet and I'm 22 weeks pregnant with first baby. So far myself and DH have bought everything we can think of she'll need, in the summer sales. We've not paid full price for anything! But I'm worries about costs when she's here.

Everyone says it's so expensive having a baby, but I can't work out what will change aside from buying nappies/wipes and possibly formula if breast feeding isn't successful. We can just about manage on maternity pay and DH's wage if these are the main expenses, but am I missing something? I always thought babies were as expensive as you wanted them to be?

Is it more when they get older?

Please help, I want to be financially ready and I feel like I'm missing something obvious

Its more the loss of earnings during mat leave... but then you cut your cloth, there is always a way to manage. I started doing weekly sho across multiple stores to get the best bargains... Tesco, then home bargains for washing powder, cleaning material, tinned food.. then lidl for fruit. You have more time when you arent at work.
Whilst i was pregnant, i picked up supplies with my weekly shop while i was still on a ful wage... nappies here, baby wipes there - it all adds up!
Plus when youe LO is born, you wont believe how generous people are! with DD1, i didnt buy her a single stitch till she was about 1!

The expense comes when they are older.. school uniforms, trips etc. My eldest is only 6, but my SIL has a 12 year old - it is much more expensive then to cloth and entertain her now!

I hope this helps xx

Ha ha OP.

Wait till you have a teenager- mobile phone contract for only one is £28 a month, school trips- dance fees are £160 a month, extra food,hot water, petrol costs,constant new clothes, an allowance.....

Babies aren't expensive, childcare and loss of earning are though.

This.

No need for a mobile phone contract though - we only top DC1's up once every 3 months or so, and she bought her own Android phone.

We pay £7 a month for a rolling sim contract, no need for anything more, there's WiFi everywhere.

No roaming wifi where I live.

No need for dance lessons either I guess, and we could knit all their clothes from unravelled jumpers......

Childcare and needing space (extra bedrooms and garden).

Nobodies mentioned the birthday parties yet!!

At least £5-10 to attend

Venue hire party food cake presents clothes decorations invited - all adds up - even one at home

By 'everywhere' I meant, school / Costa/ mates' houses etc. I'm not actually sure why anyone needs more than minimum data tbh.

Dance lessons and phone contacts aren't comparable so not sure why you've mentioned that pearlymum

true pearly :o as I said we spend probably £300 per month on activities, but would see £28 per month on a mobile contract as unnecessary ... it depends what seems worth it to you in each separate case...

£100 for a kids' party (hosting I mean) is my average, seems to add up to that in lots of different tiny bits if at home or in one lump if a not to expensive package deal (like bowling for 10 kids). Lots of MNers seem to spend a lot more but locally that is about normal I think.

£14 a week for Cubs!!! Blimey. Ours is £16 a month.

By 'everywhere' I meant, school / Costa/ mates' houses etc.

Most mates houses only have very slow speed- 2mgb. No wifi at school, nearest costa is a 15 mile journey. Only place my kids get reliable wifi is at home.

Dance lessons and phone contacts aren't comparable so not sure why you've mentioned that

Because neither are strictly necessary.

Blimey, I thought we lived in the middle of nowhere but clearly not, I can see why you'd want data in those circumstances.

No unravelling jumpers here I'm not even going in to how much we pay for music and sports lessons!

Babies are not expensive, unless you want childcare, because you can get everything second hand and they don't care!
They get more expensive by the year.

Giff gaff is much less than £28 a month. My dc activities aren't expensive, running club £3 twice a week, guides, brownies rainbows £2 a week. Kids club and youth club free.

The point I was making that older children/teenagers realistically need a certain quality of life, ideally access to some extra curricular activities, basics plus some fun.
Whether that's a games console or a mobile contract, some money to buy small items or meet friends and go for ice cream or a little shopping trip.

So although the bare minimum amount to keep a 12- 16 year old alive is probably not that much, we live in the real world.
And that can cost a lot.

As well as dance fees ( £150 a month) DD needs new dance shoes every 6 weeks ( £75).

I don't eat at places where the children's menu is nuggets etc I agree it's crap. The portion sizes are a correct for children though so I wouldn't buy my 11 year old an adult meal. If dc are used to larger portions at home then they may well still be hungry.

It's a combination of things really.
Childcare and loss of earnings are a big thing, and the fact your earning potential is lower means that any extra costs are more of a stretch.

Then you have the fact you end up paying more for everything in order to accommodate the child (more so as they get older).

So your housing costs go up because most people want an extra bedroom for the child. You're using more electricity and buying more in terms of groceries because you have to feed and attend to the hygiene needs of another person. Your transport costs might go up if you don't have a car, once you have to pay for tickets for them. If you have a car already then they won't unless you have more than 2 DC and need a bigger car. Items like a washing machine and a freezer become an absolute necessity rather than a commonplace luxury meaning that you can't just muddle along with a not-quite-working one until you have the funds to replace it economically. And because of increased use of these kinds of things they are more likely to break down faster.

If you want to go on holiday you have to rent a bigger place or pay for a larger hotel room (again more so when the baby is bigger and needs a bed). You have to pay for an extra ticket on flights (etc) both ways. It all adds up.

If you decide to go out for the day, entrance to things for a family is more expensive than just for adults. If you decide to stop for lunch, a snack, or a drink, you have an extra person to buy for. And unlike when you're in a group with adults, if one person needs a drink you will need to buy one for the child(ren) too because as soon as they see it, they want it - they don't tend to think "No, I'll just wait until I get home".

If you want to go out for the evening you need to pay for a babysitter which adds a good £30 to the evening.

Then you have all of the obvious costs - clothes (which are easily found second hand when babies are in that very fast growing stage, but not so much as they get bigger and harder on their clothes and stay in the same size for longer), shoes, food, equipment such as car seats, furniture/decoration for their room or their use in the house generally.

I think most people factor in childcare costs when they say that. Babies are super cheap in my experience (once you've bought the necessities obviously) if childcare instant issue then you will be fine.
School age dc's and teens is when it gets more and more expensive year after year.

Drizzle- but someone has to look after the baby after maternity leave is finished.
The lucky ones may have family close by, but this is the only "free" childcare, otherwise it's a nursery, childminder - which cost. or a stay at home parent ( usually the mother) who then isn't earning.
So I think it's valid to factor that in.
Babies are very cheap to run for the first year , then they become extremely expensive.

School uniforms
Dinner money
School trips
Electricity/gas/water
Constant laundry
Pocket money
Birthdays
Christmas
Holidays (not allowed in term time!) childcare
Phone bills
Clothes
Rent/mortgage on a large enough property for you all
Friends presents (parties all year round!)
Days out
Hair cuts etc
Toys
Endless food. So much food

Once they are school aged that's when 90% of your earnings are eaten up by all these things. Babies are the cheap bit!

Babies are cheap. Even primary school uniform is cheap. Secondary uniform gets more expensive, especially when they lose one of their new Nike trainers, which they need for school; becuase everybody has Nike trainers for PE.

Toddlers are expensive because they grow quickly and have the capacity to break things and put your iphone in the washing machine.

My most expensive child is my 13yo, becuase he's so damn enthusiastic about everything, and wants to do every club and outing going.

My 17yo is a bargain, because he just wants to surf the net. He doesn't even wear out his shoes doing that.

Children are very expensive. But like everything else you live to your means and prioritise. There are choices for most things. Eg you get a £1000 pram or a £50 umbrella buggy.

You try to economise where you can but it doesn't always work. My dd is currently wearing a pair of ds's old trainers which is very pleasing financially! However they are similar in size and sometimes by the time ds has outgrown something, it will often also be too small for dd. Even logo uniform can be cost cut - I cut off the badges once the item is outgrown and sew them onto supermarket items. Or I buy jumpers big to last 2-3 years. You just have to do your best however you can. eBay surplus stuff. Get essentials as presents if any relatives are offering.