To think there's no point going on holiday with a baby?

[DrAston]

My husband has a few days off work coming up soon (I work at a university so have the summer off) and he wants to go away somewhere. We can't afford to go abroad with it being the summer hols so he has booked a hotel in the UK for a few nights. We have a daughter who just turned one and I just don't see the point in going away. It's not like she's going to decide to sleep in till 8 each morning while we're away and when she goes to bed we'll just be sat in the dark trying not to make any noise from 7pm. My husband is not particularly (in fact 'at all') hands-on with our daughter so I'll just be doing everything I do at home but in a small room instead. It's not even likely to be good weather where we're going (I should know-I grew up there!). Do people really enjoy holidays with babies? Aren't you just doing the same stuff you do everyday but paying a lot for the privilege of doing it somewhere else?

My daughter never slept in a pushchair, and needs complete darkness/quiet to sleep!

I think it depends on your child. I have a 15 month old who is up by 5am every morn and would never ever sleep if we took her to a restaurant in the evening, she'd be wide awake and wanting to walk and explore and wave to everyone, and throwing her food! We've just come back from a week in a camper van and although we throughly enjoyed the daytime with her, the evenings were a long way from being what our holidays used to consist of e.g.: nice bar/restaurant, late night etc.

I did, but you have to accept that it is not going to be a relaxing, do nothing holiday. At that stage we would go and explore interesting places for a few days and take baby/toddler along in a baby carrier or push chair. If it's more than a couple of nights then stay in an apartment so you have plenty of space and can easily make snacks etc. Make sure you are very central so you can pop back in the middle of the day. Around that age we went to Naples/Capri, Bruges, and did a Scandinavian trip (Stockholm/Bergen). Had a couple of nice UK trips too (Bath, Wells). If you want a relaxing pool/beach type holiday than I think you need some very obliging family/friends to come with you!

I know what you mean op. I have a 22 month old. It's bloody exhausting being away from home with her as nothing is child proofed. We went away earlier this year where there was a free standing shelf thing that was really dangerous and I had to be really vigilant. Also she kept emptying the kitchen cupboards. However we've got better at having a good time whilst we're away.

Here are my tips:
It has be self catering. My dd doesn't sit still at a table so eating every day in a restaurant would be tough.

Book a place with a living area separate as it's easier to keep that area safe and minimise time in the kitchen where there are a lot of hazards.

Book a place where it there is a nice place to sit in the evenings. The last place I stayed had a beautiful sea view so I enjoyed the view in the evening.

However if your husband isn't pulling his weight then this is completely unfair.

We have dd1 who is 6 and was born at 32 weeks and dd2 who is now 17 months and we have always taken both away from early on. Dd1 born May and out hospital for June away in localish hotel in August then across the water in October. Dd2 end of Feb and away localish hotel for Easter (also with big sister) never sat in the dark though . They always took their cues from us and if it was put across as fun and nothing to be scared of (strange place etc) and we never had any issues even with dd2 who is a holy terror spirited but seems better away than home!

Yep, mine would never sleep in a pram out at night, we took a deck of cards, DVD player and wine and went to him when he woke every couple of hours just like at home, but still felt like a holiday, you have to adapt your expectations to the hand you're dealt.

You Dh still needs to buck up. Mine also solely breastfed, but when they woken Dh would settle them after I had fed, or once bigger would settle without a feed. And def not the one having a lie in without you. For years when my boys were babies I would feed baby at say 8am, then Dh would take them running until 10-11am so I could get a lie in also

On a sunday

I agree it does depend on the baby and mine won't sleep if you put them to bed whilst out doing something exciting but try it in the hotel and walk around. They'll quickly doze off and here's to a fab evening! if they can stay asleep that is

I've had nice trips to hotels with both of mine when they were small. Admittedly for work rather than holidays so a bit different. If the bathroom is nice enough to stick some candles in, you can lie in the bath reading once they are asleep. Or if it is large enough for a travel cot the baby can sleep in there and you have the hotel room to yourself.

'Just put them in the pram and they'll sleep while you're out'

Hahahahahahahaha! You obviously haven't met my DS. I'm quite laid back and DH is horizontal, but somehow DS is basically Gina Ford.

I'm with you OP, DS is 12 months and to be honest, we have been away twice since he was born (once SC to Italy, once SC cottage in the UK) and I didn't particularly enjoy either. Both times I still did the cooking/cleaning stuff but without my 'home comforts' and it was such a faff, what with having to take everything that a baby needs. A hotel would be even worse though because at least both of ours had a living room, but we just ended up watching TV and stuff, which I could do at home for free.

I think when the kids are a bit older then it will be better, we're not planning on anymore holidays for a while as I just can't get excited about it.

I have always taken holiday with kids in this country and abroad including Europe, Florida I don't see any issues at all! The youngest we ever took was 3 months.

They all just slept in there buggies at night when we were out and about, sometimes they may stay up a hour or so later than usual but it was fine I didn't find we are till 8/9 ish on holiday anyway so always asleep by then.

Holidays are what you make them if your going to sit in dark/ silent room come 7 every night then course your going to have a crap time

We didn't go away for a single night until DS was 2 years old. Just no point at all - too much cost and hassle for nothing.

He was about 5 or 6 before we flew abroad - that was magical to see him soaking up the airport environment, the flight and then the different cultures etc abroad.

What's the hurry? Best to do these things when the child is more amenable rather than put yourself through all the stress for nothing.

Depends on the baby. DD never slept well outside of the home and used to scream for 2/3 hours in the middle of the night whenever we went on holiday or stayed overnight with family. We'd all end up exhausted and miserable as a result. Any holidays we took before the age of 3 were a disaster.

Atiny - it really was awful. The lady showed us to this amazing apartment and dh and i just looked at each other and our hearts sank. She was expecting us to be really pleased but we we asked to be moved. She was nice and young and said can't you just tell him no? hollow laugh. She probably went off bitching about crazy Brits

Another time when ds2 was 1 we went to a caravan and it had those vertical blinds you see in offices, they had a string of plastic beads looping from panel to panel dangling down. DS2 spent the whole 3 days lunging at them and ripping the blinds off the wall. The only way to stop him was to physically restrain him, which just angered him and made him more determined. And holding onto a very angry huge one year old for hours is not fun at all. So again it was traipsing round in the rain outside for hours. Now we have added vertical blinds to our expanding list of no nos.

Wherever we go we look very closely at the photos and spot any hazards and call the people first and give them the 3rd degree. They all must think we are the most precious fuckwits ever.

I have said this on MN before, but it's like going on holiday with a drunk, belligerent, unpredictable gnome.

We are going to a really lovely lovely hotel in a couple of weeks for 2 whole nights sans children and i can't wait. We've even got a balcony! (this is just before dc3 arrives and it all starts again - sigh)

For me, going on holiday with a baby was great because -

We always went somewhere hot
We always rented a house with our own pool (very good for wearing small ones out so they would have lengthy sleeps during the day)
My dh did pretty much everything and let me sleep in.

What you describe, OP, doesn't sound like much of a break for you.

I have said this on MN before, but it's like going on holiday with a drunk, belligerent, unpredictable gnome.

I can't embolden this quote but it's so funny and so true!!

I agree! We're going on holiday this week with our five month old but only for the sake of my ten year old! It all seems more hassle than it's worth!

We went to self catering apartment in Spain. It is hard work but break was nice. Mine only slept for short bits in pram at night so they were good and sometimes ate with us about7:30. At home they are in bed at 6:30. We were usually back by 9 ish they had night bottle and slept.

drunk belligerent unpredictable gnowm

And don't you love people with no kids who think children just do as you tell them and no means no bollocks? My sister is like this.

YANBU - this is why we waited until primary age to go anywhere other than Center Parcs or grandparents. It's no fun at all if you have kids who scream with over-tiredness after 6pm and will only sodding sleep if they're horizontal in a dark, quiet room.

I think ideally you at least need bedroom/living area so that your baby can sleep whilst you have adult evening time. An apartment on Airbnb might be better suited. When mine were little we went away in a static caravan which worked out great. It meant when the weather was nice we could put our little one down for nap and sit outside with window open to listen out for them. That was perfect! Hope you get a break somehow x

Holidaying with babies and small children was hard work but worth it. We used to camp which I think made the experience easier as our expectations were already low.

On the whole we got more out of holidays as just sitting around doing nothing was never going to happen.

www.huffingtonpost.com/m-blazoned/vacation-or-trip-a-helpful-guide-for-parents_b_7789310.html

This made us feel much better about getting away with our DCs...

I feel the same OP.
The weekend just gone, DH and I were going to have a trip away to see my best friend (lives about 4 hours away) and stay the night in a nice hotel, leaving 15 month old Dd behind. But then my childcare fell through because my brother is a selfish bastard who guilt tripped my parents into looking after his kids instead and DH said "well shall we just go anyway and take her with us" Urrrrm how about no?! Would have been exactly as you describe: one or both of ussitting in a dark room from about 7pm trying not to wake her. Definitely not my idea of a weekend away!