...to be annoyed that she announced this?

[Stylest]

I had DS, 2 days ago. We told our close friends & family. One of our close friends put it on Facebook, with the picture we sent her, with his full name, etc. Then at the end "congratulations (then my name tagged) & (DH's name tagged)"...

I then got floods of texts, calls, messages, comments on the post, etc. I'm gutted. I wanted to announce him. I wanted to tell people his name, etc.

AIBU to feel annoyed, or am I being a bit sensitive?

I'd be livid. I would never, ever do this- some people don't want details of engagements, weddings, pregnancies or births on Facebook. I would never mention a major event like this until the couple involved did so!

I'm 23 weeks pregnant and for various reasons, DH and I have decided to put nothing on Facebook about the pregnancy. I thought that it was fairly clear that we didn't want it in there. However, my cousin's wife decided to write her congratulations 'on the pregnancy' on my wall rather than just texting me back/ sending a private message. For goodness sake.

So the lesson we've learnt is that when we text/ call people to announce the birth we need to say "please do not put anything on social media until we have decided if we want to" just what we'll want to be doing when we're tired and emotional...

.... And if you did want to congratulate the couple on social media, it only takes a second to check their profiles to see if they've announced anything/ anyone else has announced the news. If they haven't, don't do it. Simple.

Not necessarily. I don't put anything of that sort on my Facebook. I've no issue with other people putting it on my wall or tagging me in it, I just don't use Facebook like that

YANBU - I would be absolutely fuming.

I don't see why people are saying 2 days is too long to announce it, you can take as long as you like!

I will probably be just telling family and close friends to start with and then maybe a Facebook post a few days later once I've had time to settle - I doubt I'll even be thinking about social media with a new born and I would definitely want to be out of hospital first!

Oh honestly, who cares? It's will likely to get to the stage where nobody bothers posting anything anywhere for fear of having done the wrong thing and risking relatives not forgiving them for decades (if ever) and/or 'going no contact'.

There will be myriad proud parents, waiting for 'likes' and 'congratulations' and nobody will bother.

If you have relatives/friends who can't stop announcing news and it annoys you then just keep quiet yourselves. The world will keep turning if you don't tell anybody and soon they will cease to be interested anyway.

Petal40 & Marilynbigsister got it right - Facebook, has a lot to answer for, it just causes a lot of cr@p!

YANBU - how very dare she do that! I would have been very upset if it had of been me & doubley so as I'm not on it)!!!

Congratulations on the birth of your baby!

I'm old enough to remember a time prior to FB, or even home phones, when new parents would return home with the baby, or give birth at home, and the neighbours would find out, tell their neighbours, who would tell their neighbours etc etc. Sometimes, distant relatives would discover they were an "auntie", in the village shop or pub!

There was no "announcement" to be made - parents of a certain social standing would pay for a birth announcement, but that was it.

Social media is not "media" - it is the electronic equivalent of the village coffee morning, post office queue or school gate drop off. Unlike traditional gossip, you can prevent people talking about you to those who know you by changing your settings - congratulations on your new baby OP, but your expectations are too high.

YANBU. My Uncle did it (just thoughtless), 2 years later I'm still a bit annoyed.
When we decided on DD's name family were told with a clear, "please do not put this on FaceBook before we do!"

It's so annoying. I go onto MN to announce my opinion and LyingWitch has already said it. Every time.

OP, two days is too late. And any news is anybody's news unless you specify otherwise.

YADNBU. When my son and his girlfriend were expecting their baby they asked all of us to keep the news off Facebook until they announced it, and both families respected this. Your baby = your news to share as and when you are ready.

I actually did this once, when one of my best friends had her first baby. I was honestly just so happy for her and posted before I even thought about it (no photo though, I hasten to add). Her husband messaged me pretty sharpish asking me to take it down, which I immediately did as I was mortified that I hadn't thought. I apologised profusely- and even now, several years on, it makes me cringe to think I did it! It was entirely from a happy place though, not from a thunder stealing one, so don't be too harsh on your friend.

my DSis did this to me. Second child and we didn't specifically say don't put it on FB, like we did with DS1. She took my DH's 'Let everyone know' to mean put it on FB

To be fair to your DSis Davina, I can see why she did this. To me "let everyone know" would mean "let everyone know by whatever means" not "tell the family but don't put it on FB because we said not to last time and we still mean that even though we haven't said it."

I can see why you're annoyed OP but I can also see why your friend did this. It's happened, don't let it spoil things for you.

Just play ignorant and say I haven't had the baby yet, the day after offer your own announcement .

id be very pissed off, I have never announced my pregnancy's/births on fb, I tell who I want in person, I've even seen someone announce their fathers death on fb before their mother had even had chance to tell her brother, it was an unexpected death and the mother had been to see her daughter to tell her in person, and was on her way to tell her son...do people really sit and think...i'd better put this on fb about everything

Yabu. Your baby was 2 days old.

Next time change your fb settings so you cant be tagged without allowing the tag yourself, and make it so nobody can post on your wall. Or delete your account until youre ready to post a photo yourself.

YANBU
I never put pictures of other people on social media and would definitely never put one of another person's child.

None of my friends do, but then again my friends know that no pics of my home are to be posted either. Ir my parties or my wedding.

I let them know before they can accept my invitation. I hate that people post stuff about others.

It has made me wonder whether I should be off social media but I do keep in touch with people abroad with it

I hope you asked her to take the pic down

aw i'm sorry. Yes, you're entirely entitled to your feelings. It was your news to tell. People get over-excited at these times and don't think I suppose.

YABU, why does it matter? I was too preocupied with newborn to care who told who and was glad my mother took it upon herself to let everyone know, whether they were interested or not.

YANBU. If the person themselves haven't announced anything then nobody else should post until they do, it's just decency really! I wanted to post something about my brothers wedding recently but didn't until the bride had posted it herself so as not to steal her thunder.

A family member once posted a family death on FB and her family were livid as they hadn't told everyone yet, and she did it within a couple of hours. So wrong.

You are being VU unless you told her not to share your news then how on earth was she supposed to know she couldn't share your news. Your friend was excited about your baby. Be grateful you have friends who care. 2 days is a really long time. My hubby called my mam minutes after the birth - she took care of the rest and I couldn't have cared less.

If the person themselves haven't announced anything then nobody else should post until they do,

But they had, pink - the OP had "announced" the news to her friend. Would it be equally unacceptable for the friend to mention it to someone at the pub, or at her place of work - "oh, it's so lovely, my friend had a baby a few days ago, they've called him "x""?

The picture is a bit much but she couldn't possibly have been expected to realise that 48 hours after the baby's arrival some people still didn't know.....

Why keep it secret for so long.

Ya gotta love the 'how dare they' posts. Here's the thing a secret is no longer a secret once the keeper of that secret has told one person.

So in other words if you want something to remain a secret don't tell someone your secret. In the grand scheme of things it seems just so dramatic to be focused on this as an issue instead of letting it go.

In other words get over it, life goes on.

2nds+1

Also, it's the birth of a baby. Not the first. Not the last.

It's the kind of news that seems really newsy when it's your own baby and when your kids are teenagers you think 'k'. Sorry, but true......