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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

DS, 5, wants to marry male best friend

137 replies

pjsgalore · 01/07/2016 23:04

DS, 5, says he's in love with his best friend, and wants to marry him, and when they're older they're going to adopt children and live in a volcano... the love is fully requited by the best friend!I think it's funny and sweet, but my DH (who is actually a lovely, non-homophobe), who did find it funny, is now finding it slightly disconcerting- anyone else had a DS who ants to marry their male best friend at about this age? I've told DH lots of kids talk about marrying at this age - both my cousins (male and female) wanted to marry my brother when they were little! Not that he wouldn't accept him being gay, but I don't think it's to do with that at this age. Any thoughts appreciated!

OP posts:

PatriciaHolm · 01/07/2016 23:06

At this age DS wanted to marry me, because it meant he would never have to leave home.

It's normal. Why does he find it disconcerting?

Champagneformyrealfriends · 01/07/2016 23:07

Tell your DH to get a grip.

littleprincesssara · 01/07/2016 23:08

Perfectly normal. When I was that age I was 100% determined I was going to marry my pet rabbit.

SpookyRachel · 01/07/2016 23:08

Well... maybe I'm being a bit tired and tetchy, but I suspect your dh is a little less non-homophobe than you think?

flappingbingowings · 01/07/2016 23:08

At that age my DS wanted to marry the cat. Fuck knows why, the cat is a complete git. Each to their own.

MrsTerryPratchett · 01/07/2016 23:09

DD wants to marry girls, boys, me, DH and recently her friend's dad. Because he has nice hair and teeth. Thank goodness the mum found it funny when DD said "we will have to get rid of x (friend's mum) with a smile 🤔

EdmundCleverClogs · 01/07/2016 23:09

He's 5. Does it actually matter? Would you be asking this if he said he wanted to marry a girl? Why is who he wants to marry the train of though, not finding his dream of living in a volcano 'disconcerting' . What an odd thread...

Gileswithachainsaw · 01/07/2016 23:10

It's normal. your dh needs to get a grip.

he will want to marry the teacher next week.

natwebb79 · 01/07/2016 23:10

Yep. My nearly 5 year old is convinced he'll marry me. Or his brother. He just thinks you marry your favourite people.

PoppyStellar · 01/07/2016 23:10

My DD wants to marry the cat too

TheWindInThePillows · 01/07/2016 23:11

My dd2 wanted to marry her female best friend around the same age.

Before that, she wanted to marry her dad, so we had to explain you had to find an other person from outside the family, so she did (this was just before gay marriage became legal).

Now children are super-aware of same sex marriage from the off, which I think is much better.

CocktailQueen · 01/07/2016 23:11

At that age my DS wanted to marry the cat. Fuck knows why, the cat is a complete git. Each to their own.

ImNotJoeMyNameIsHarry · 01/07/2016 23:12

Don't worry it's normal. At 7 I married our dog. At that age it's kids being kids.

flappingbingowings · 01/07/2016 23:16

The cat had a fight with a fox in the garden this morning. Which made the cat look cool in the eyes of DS. So DS is not wavering from this marriage thing. I'm concerned the cat is the dominant one in this partnership.

Windsofwinter · 01/07/2016 23:16

Until recently my DS (8) though he'd marry his sister (3) because he loves her. I just thought it was sweet. I don't think at that age they understand what marriage is and just think of spending time with their favourite person.

Agree with PP though, your DH might have a feelings he wouldn't openly admit...

Original poster

pjsgalore · 01/07/2016 23:16

Ha - these are lovely stories! Actually I think I married my dog too!

DH says he finds it disconcerting because it's all DS talks about at the moment - literally he's obsessed! - I just showed him these responses - and he said he would feel the same if it was a girl. So don't worry - no need to call out the lynch mob just yet!! Just wanted to tell him/show him lots of kids at this age have amusing marriage scenarios.

OP posts:

wonkylegs · 01/07/2016 23:17

At 5 DS was convinced he was going to marry me, when I pointed out that I was already married to daddy, he told me we would just have to get a divorce (like granny & granddad)
He now thinks he's going to buy next door because I told him he would have to move out when he was a grown up, which I find much more concerning.

Sallystyle · 01/07/2016 23:18

My 7 year old still wants to marry me.

Apparently she gets the dress but I can't wear one.

milkysmum · 01/07/2016 23:19

7 year old dd is absolutely adamant she is marrying her best (female also) friend. They have had a pretend date which consisted of sandwiches in the shed and have apparently sorted out s flat to live in after the wedding. I suspect it will fizzle out before then........ !

Lilacpink40 · 01/07/2016 23:19

My DCs (KS1 and KS2) considered marrying each other for about 5 seconds a few years ago. They'd normally choose a best friend of the day, and quickly adjusted back to that stance.

StandoutMop · 01/07/2016 23:20

wonky my DD has planned for us to split our house into flats so "we can all live here forever!"

Gileswithachainsaw · 01/07/2016 23:20

Oh I have Dds not dss but dd2 wants to marry her best friend so...

I'm just pleased it's sunk in. I've tried to make it clear that people can marry whoever they want or no one at all

dd1 doesn't want to marry anyone

Tanith · 01/07/2016 23:25

DS, at the age of 4, came home from Reception a bit sheepish.
"I'm getting married," he muttered, "To A."
He paused, then:
"Am I allowed to marry an older woman?"
A, I might add, was an older woman of 5 by virtue of her Autumn birthday

MarklahMarklah · 01/07/2016 23:26

DD is 5 and wants to marry 3 children from her class - 2 girls and a boy. I tried to explain that you can really only be married to one person but she thought that was boring!

She knows that she can marry or live with who she wants when she's older, as long as they're happy, respect, love and care about each other. I'd be worried about her getting lava burns from living in a volcano though.

DollyBarton · 01/07/2016 23:27

What exactly is your non-homophobe DH worried about?

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