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AIBU?

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To think I do not deserve 3 days of verbal abuse from my Dickhead husband for this?

235 replies

SGlass · 29/06/2016 08:27

went away for a few days and left my kids (15 and 17) home alone. We've done this a few times and it's always been ok - MIL around corner and normally sensible lads. Unfortunately this time oldest had a party without consent of approval. Stuff got moved, minor things got broken and a bottle of JD has gone missing. Also, someone slept in our bed. DH and I both fuming. I spoke to DS and told him how disappointed I was, how let down I felt, how angry I was and how disappointed in him I am. I also told him the phone he's been asking me to help him buy is now off the cards and there is now a blanket ban on friends in the house.
Well DH decided this was not the way I should have dealt with it as my wording was all wrong. From then on (this was Monday) I have received a list of insults from DH such as "you're as bad as them, you need to grow some balls, you're soft as shit, they're not my kids so why should I sort them out (I never asked him too) the 3 of you are a joke, you've brought them up like this, they're the worst kids I know, DS is a liar and a spoilt brat, if you don't grow some balls and sort it the marriage is doomed, if he keeps knocking this house about I'll knock him about" etc etc etc - he just went on and on and in laying into me all night until I went to bed.

Last night was horrendous. I'd spent all day washing and tidying his clothes that he took away with him and made him dinner. As soon as he came in he started on me again. To cut a long story short it started off with the same stuff as night before so I went in another room. He then asked me for my bank details so he could have a look at transactions. Nothing to hide so gave him the details. Next minute he comes flying in with a list of transactions that he wanted explaining (most were me transferring money to DS either for pocket money, clothes, the odd phone top up and times when he's given me cash and asked me to transfer it to his bank so he can buy something online. Now obviously I can't explain precisely the £10 that went out on the 4th October last year because I can't remember!!!

He ended up throwing the list at me, called me a piece of shit and then stormed off. He then came back in and stepped up the insults with "you still act like a single mother on easy street, I'm just a meal ticket for you three, I'm a fucking mug putting up with you 3, they're not even my fucking kids yet I'm the breadwinner, you're a user, all 3 of you are fucking users, none of you respect me, wish I'd never fucking married you (this one hurt). Etc etc

We only got married 2 months ago. What a spiteful horrible cunt of a man to say that to me. Can I just add I work full time earning £22k a year so I'm not a fucking user or gold digger. It's £22k a year more than his perfect ex ever brought in yet I'm the user??? I've been sworn at, had paper thrown at me, had the sofa/desk whacked where I've been sitting, called a user/piece of shit, been reminded constantly of his "breadwinner status" and been told he wishes he'd never married me - because my son had a party???!!

On top of this he slept in another room last night and told me to organise my kids tea before I go for my late shift today as they're not his kids so he's not responsible for feeding them.

Been married two months and I want to throw the fucker out. I feel it all so unjustified. I've tried talking to him sensibly and he just shouts me down, twists my words and swears at me like a chavvy loser. Fuming.

OP posts:
ElspethFlashman · 29/06/2016 14:17

Previously Banned Poster.

firesidechat · 29/06/2016 14:18

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Chocolatefudgecake100 · 29/06/2016 14:18

Get rid asap this mans vile n disgusting

LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 29/06/2016 14:19

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firesidechat · 29/06/2016 14:21

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GissASquizz · 29/06/2016 14:28

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ElspethFlashman · 29/06/2016 14:29

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firesidechat · 29/06/2016 14:32

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BBQsAreSooooOverrated · 29/06/2016 14:40

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CraftyPenguin · 29/06/2016 14:48

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LineyReborn · 29/06/2016 14:49

I reported this ages ago.

Jasperkiss5 · 29/06/2016 14:49

It's not as easy as to just 'get rid'. What a piece of shit advice, especially when you were only married 2 months ago.

I'm sorry to hear this OP. It's mot normal behaviour from a newly wed couple. It's obvious he needs to take accountability for his actions over the past 3 days, he is the one treating you like muck, emotionally. One step at a time before you just 'get rid'.

WildImaginings · 29/06/2016 15:09

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GabsAlot · 29/06/2016 15:43

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TheDuchessOfArbroathsHat · 29/06/2016 15:50

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firesidechat · 29/06/2016 15:56

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GabsAlot · 29/06/2016 16:06

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DailyMailEthicalFail · 29/06/2016 16:31

Hang on - no one but the OP can REALLY know if the thread is helpful to her!

Speculating on whether it is truthful or she has mental health issues?

no wonder she is not coming back Sad

LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 29/06/2016 16:33

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StickTheDMWhereTheSunDontShine · 29/06/2016 16:41

IIRC, her last thread was about how she was having second thoughts about getting married. Everyone said don't, then. But she did and here we are.

KatherineMumsnet · 29/06/2016 16:46

Hi all - please can we ask everyone to stop trollhunting. If you're not sure about something, please just mail us instead. We're now having to suspend the thread just to remove these.

WellErrr · 29/06/2016 17:43

Is it the same poster Katherine?

WellErrr · 29/06/2016 17:44

Ps sorry b

WellErrr · 29/06/2016 17:44

B? Just sorry!

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