.. to think that "I fear for my sons" and ..

[BertrandRussell]

"I feel sorry for my sons" are just new ways of saying "I hate feminists"?

At the time I was bloody grateful - Jason.

I'm joking White.

I would advise my 14 year old daughter to get in the carriage with the woman

I would advise my 13 year old son to get in the carriage with the woman

I would let my 17 decide for himself

I would tell all of them that they should be careful around everyone male or female

Why should men not discuss the under representation of men in lower paid, lower status jobs? If they are good enough jobs for women, why shouldn't they be shown as good enough jobs for men?

I'm joking too White, sorry

It's actually the sort of thing that is quite commonplace amongst decent people keeping an eye out for others.
Most people are essentially nice I think.

Yea got that - with second read sorry Jason

I'm being distracted by Paddington bear ironically he just reached the station and youngest asking question about us having been there.
He just about to be rescued.

Most people are essentially nice I think.

Your right Mango I've many more examples of people being really nice - moving seats helping with bags,doors, stairs, directions and confirming it's the right platform and train etc pre and post children than I've ever had problems with people on trains .

I fear for my son and feel sorry for him but it is nothing to do with feminism I'm 100% a feminist. Unfortunately my son is disabled and has a progressive degenerative genetic condition as well as being on the spectrum and 'fear' is too small a word for the way I worry about the things that could happen going by the things that have already happened to him due to other people's ignorance and malice.

People tend to be mostly kind as long as you fit in with their perception of what is 'their sort of person' and a grumpy young man with poor social skills who appears to be lazy due to a combination of pain (from various and serious invisible physical problems) and autistic spectrum traits tends not to elicit much sympathy from people who prefer to assume he is 'spoilt' or 'arrogant' and behave accordingly without bothering to find out otherwise or even consider any alternative explanation.

He is a kind, determined, gentle lad firmly committed to intersectional equality and inclusion who has often been taken advantage of and been physically attacked by people who jump to conclusions and he has been let down by a system that pays lip-service to providing support for disabled people but instead leads them into believing they will get support and doesn't come up with the (paid for goods) and he is now left with a massive student debt and nothing to show for it other than stress related health problems on top of the original disabilities he has to content with.

So I can see where the conclusion might be drawn from the sentences quoted by the OP but I would caution any automatic judgement of a person using them until you are aware of the full background as people with disabled sons or sons who have other marginalising characteristics may well have a very valid reason for saying them.

I think the idea behind this thread was to have a big argument about Sexism (while being sexist), but it's totally fallen flat and every time the OP and friends have tried to steer it that way nobody has fallen into the trap.

This is why this kind of thing is better on the feminist board it far easier to instigate and bait over there.

What's ridiculous is that people have managed for 33 pages to argue about something that surely should be quite clear-cut.

If you respond to feminist arguments by saying that you fear for your sons, you are belittling women and their ongoing fight for equality.

Feminism means seeking equality for all. Ergo it is good for both genders. The only people it is not good for are men and women who wish to protect entrenched gender roles.

If you fear for your sons in other contexts beside feminism, that is not relevant here. Despite what lots of posters are saying, the context was perfectly clear from the OP; I do not frequent the feminism boards but I immediately understood this.

Society in general does not like women 'making a fuss' about things. Hence a stock response to many perfectly reasonable feminist discussions is to try to end them with melodramatic 'fears' about how affording women equal respect will ruin men's lives. Surely we all realise this after 33 pages? All these theoretical situations aren't particularly helping...

the context was perfectly clear from the OP

Yes, everyone was making it up. That's all you have managed to come up with after 33 pages, everyone who didn't know the context, from a question, was making it up.

The op was a one line question, It was in no way shape or form put into context until 200 posts in. It was a goady as fuck question to try and raise a non exsistant issue on this thread about a thread only 4 people read on the feminist board.

Case closed.

All these theoretical situations aren't particularly helping.

The op didn't even state a situation, you are going to get people creating their own situational context if they do not have one.

Unfortunatly it's what happens when goady posts are too vauge, it doesn't sway the way it's intended to.

All right, calm down Jason - I'm saying it was perfectly clear to me - and I'm not making that up either.

Irrelevant now, though, isn't it? We all know what was meant and yet still we have people disagreeing.

If you had people attempting to end discussions about the rights of LGBT people with stupid comments like 'I fear for my heterosexual children' you'd expect those people called out as bigots, no?

Go figure.

If you had people attempting to end discussions about the rights of LGBT people with stupid comments like 'I fear for my heterosexual children' you'd expect those people called out as bigots, no?

In that context yes. if it was:
AIBU to think "I fear for my son and daughter is a new way of saying "I hate gays."

Then you'd get the same thing, no?

Go figure.

the context was perfectly clear from the OP

No it wasn't.

I fear for the posters on MN if ambiguous & oblique thread titles & OPs such as this one are considered 'perfectly clear'.

Then following on you'd have to get a poster who is so stuck up their own arse that every post from them made on your imagenary thread is:

Damn Anti-LGB's making this thread about straight people. Typical Anti LGB tatic.

How is it ending discussion talking about Males when the OP asks a question involving discussion about sons?

Even if it was unclear (which it wasn't -otherwise how did half of us get it? ) , are you so damaged by a moment's confusion that you can't now engage in the actual discussion?

In short, has the OP so upset you by being 'oblique' that you can't accept the following: over-reacting to one group's quest for being viewed as equals to all other groups by 'fearing' for one of the other groups is, at best, misguided and, at worst, offensive.

Even if it was unclear (which it wasn't -otherwise how did half of us get it? )

So you are saying half the posters are lying, why?

Would have these poster be regulars on the femenist board who have seen the thread this one is about perhaps?

have= Half

It was clear enough that people who weren't determined to misunderstand could get it straight away. ..

It was clear enough that people who weren't determined to misunderstand could get it straight away. ..

And yet many people didn't.

Why would they lie?

are they all men in disguse?

Merchant, the whole thing has been discussed to death.

I have been on the thread throughout.

In short, has the OP so upset you by being 'oblique'

Not upset in the least.
An anonymous post on an Internet forum, which does not personally address me doesn't affect my emotions in the least.

that you can't accept the following: over-reacting to one group's quest for being viewed as equals to all other groups by 'fearing' for one of the other groups is, at best, misguided and, at worst, offensive.

If people responded to a perfectly reasonable feminist (or otherwise) assertion with "I fear for my sons" then it is rude & minimising.

If people respond to things such as "all men are potential rapists" with "I fear for my sons" then it is perfectly understandable.

In no way would I equate that sentence with "I hate feminists" though.

I'm pretty sure if someone 'hated feminists' they would not tie themselves in knots finding a nicer way to phrase it - they would just say it (as many in fact do).

I do fear for my sons and that has got fuck all to do with feminism. And anyway if feminism is working it will automatically make life better for men too IMO.