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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

a parking one with a note from neighbour

490 replies

KinkyAfro · 04/06/2016 13:42

This is the letter left on DP's van yesterday. We live at 215, attached to 213, then there's a road and then 211 where note writer lives.

I'm having to sit on my hands so I don't write a response. AIBU to think this is a bit passive aggressive or AIBU to park van there?

[Message from MNHQ: We've had to remove the attached letter as it was a bit too identiyfing. We realise the rest of the thread will make little sense now to anyone new to the thread, but we're leaving it up so the OP can continue to discuss with those already on board].

OP posts:
Tanfastic · 04/06/2016 14:19

Ahh yes, I see what you mean op (having now looked at Google maps) WinkGrin

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 04/06/2016 14:19

You could try asking if they'd mind you putting it on their drive? (Since they don't have a car there.)

Although it is a bit petty, I imagine it's got to the point that it's nagging away at her and every time she goes outside, all she sees is the top of the van.

Original poster
KinkyAfro · 04/06/2016 14:21

It's not there everytime they go out, it's been there once during the day

OP posts:
Original poster
KinkyAfro · 04/06/2016 14:22

Just been a card pushed through door now!

OP posts:
DooblieDooo · 04/06/2016 14:23

You have listed the numbers, letter gives the street name, which I have to confess I did look on google maps. Sorry. It is a proper side road with a large wide mouth to it.

I can totally see why the van gets parked where it does, she is an end house so her back garden runs parallel to the side street and then there are more houses.

Plus there are grass verges in front of the houses with rocks on making parking impossible.

The fact that she knows the situation is temporary makes the neighbour sound weird. She doesn't own the road and it isn't parked in front of her house but next to her back garden. She could turn her back on it and face the other gardens or the side of the house at the bottom of her garden. She has options.

FlouncyMcFlounceFace · 04/06/2016 14:23

If there is somewhere relatively close by that you could also park then wouldn't it be the kindest thing for neighbourly relations to just move?

Regardless of whether shes reasonable to be frustrated, she obviously is. Her upset is genuine, unless there is litterally no other parking option I'd park elsewhere.

PenguinsAreAce · 04/06/2016 14:23

You need to install something like on it so she can still enjoy the view.

Seriously though, try to park elsewhere. She is obviously very bothered Sad.

gamerchick · 04/06/2016 14:24

Just tell them its temporary and give them an end date. Things are more bearable for most normal people when there's an end in sight.

PolkadotsAndMoonbeams · 04/06/2016 14:24

Perhaps she goes out in the evening/night to do her watering? It's been very hot here recently so I've been doing my garden stuff late.

I just meant it's got to the point where she instantly notices it. I think it's OTT, but it's obviously upsetting her and she's become hypersensitive to it.

AugustaFinkNottle · 04/06/2016 14:27

It seems to me a perfectly polite note. When you're parking a work van I think it is fairly selfish to leave it in the same place every day. Just park a bit further away, and vary where you park.

I assume the bus stop isn't at the end of the drive? Why not park there?

memyselfandaye · 04/06/2016 14:27

If it's taxed, insured, on a public road and not blocking a drive she will just have to suck it up.

She's a busybody with nothing better to do than moan.

So she can see the top of the van over a 6ft fence, tough.

SilverBirchWithout · 04/06/2016 14:28

It's very easy to find your location if you google the first line of the address. There are few 211 WE roads that are situated on a corner in the way you describe. I guess yours is a place being with W?

PreciousVagine · 04/06/2016 14:29

What does she see when the van isn't there? Sky? The house opposite? It really is just a nit picky neighbour overthinking things.

MagicalMrsMistoffelees · 04/06/2016 14:29

It's on a public street.

It's temporary.

It's usually only overnight.

It's to the side of the house.

It's behind a six foot fence.

I can't understand how anyone could have the nerve to write that letter. It's just crazy!

RaeSkywalker · 04/06/2016 14:30

Are the residents in all day? This is the kind of thing that would upset my grandad, he doesn't go out that much and so would be there to 'notice' when it came and went constantly. Even if the van is only there in the evenings, the evenings are getting lighter now, so it will still be visible.

Our neighbours have 2 cars and a van. The van is constantly parked on the road, and if I'm honest, it is annoying because it hides the entrance to our driveway and makes reversing on very difficult. However, the neighbours popped round shortly after we moved in and explained that they had tried everything, even having their (small) front garden paved, to make space to get the van off the road. We've accepted that it's just one of those things and appreciate that they've acknowledged that it's a pain for us.

I know that your Mum has already been round, but I think that you or your DP should perhaps go and speak to the neighbour. Even if you don't agree with them, empathise with them, and it might placate them and make life easier for your Mum when you leave.

Original poster
KinkyAfro · 04/06/2016 14:31

The card just posted through the door says "many thanks for your prompt response to my request, it is very much appreciated".

DP is at work so van's not here!

OP posts:
PreciousVagine · 04/06/2016 14:33

Are these people not capable of knocking? You need to go round now to save getting another letter when poor dp comes home with the van Grin

LadyStarkOfWinterfell · 04/06/2016 14:35

She is being a dick. Carry on.

bridget666 · 04/06/2016 14:36

the neighbor is being a tad prissy, however remember that it's your mums house you are temporarily residing at..your Mum has to deal with any unpleasantness after you are gone. Just move it.

SilverBirchWithout · 04/06/2016 14:37

A van parked at the side of my garden would pee me off if it was there every evening and weekend when I wanted to use my garden.

She does acknowledge that she doesn't own the view, but why can't you at least try to not park there all the time to be neighbourly. It is a polite note, just try parking on the opposite side of the road, the extra distance will probably mean the van is not visible above the fence.

Vans are ugly in residential areas, particularly if they are larger ones.

Hodooooooooor · 04/06/2016 14:38

A van parked at the side of my garden would pee me off if it was there every evening and weekend when I wanted to use my garden

Why does a few inches of van over the top of your fence affect you using your garden?

SouthWesterlyWinds · 04/06/2016 14:39

Then she'll be passed off tonight whe he comes back tonight.

glintwithpersperation · 04/06/2016 14:42

What a ridiculous note!

Arkwright · 04/06/2016 14:42

I think it's polite to vary where you park. Why can't you put the van on the drive and your car in this space by the neighbour.

memyselfandaye · 04/06/2016 14:43

She can't park the van over the road Silverbirch and she shouldn't have to, just because the local busybody can see SIX INCHES of the top of it over her fence.

OP Write a note back telling her to stop looking at the top of her fence, job done.

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