AIBU to not know much about 'lady garden' maintenance!!

[Joolsy]

OK I'm sorry if I'm putting people off their breakfast. But I have never bothered much with doing anything about my hair 'down there'. I am not a hairy person so it's not like it's hugely overgrown(!). But all I really do is shave my bikini line, like once a year if I'm going on holiday (I don't wear a high-cut swimsuit). Seriously, what else do other people do? I'm worried now that I look like I'm smuggling a ferret down there whenever I go swimming. Should I be trimming it on a regular basis?

I don't want to go to the beach / swimming pool and see anyones pubes hanging out. Male or female. So I say either cut it off or cover it up

First of all, stop staring at peoples nethers, then you won't even notice.
Second, if you have a problem with visible hair, that is your problem, no-one elses.
And finally, no thanks. In fact I think I'll make as much of it visible as possible, just to annoy the pube police!

Porn was never so visible nor ubiquitous. Children couldn't access porn, teens weren't surrounded by it.

And the trend is only going in one direction.

I think sigma has it with this:

"There will be no Societal Change because there is too much money at stake. There is now a huge industry now around pubic hair removal,"

the fantastic thing about pubic hair is that it will keep growing back (for most people!) so if you can be persuaded that it shouldn't be there, or should be a different shape, there's a lifetime income for someone.

Women are under all kinds of pressures to change how their bodies look and behave in ways that, or course, cost money. So are men, increasingly. the pressure now is less for men, because it is going to take some time for the appearance of men to become as important and defining as the appearance of women, in terms of their value. but as a society, we are increasingly all being commodified and found wanting, because this is how to keep us spending on "improvements"

I don't blame anyone who does any of this, of course. We all live in society, we all do what we gotta do

"I don't want to go to the beach / swimming pool and see anyones pubes hanging out"

Can you explain why not?

what I think is interesting is that while we used to be sold ways to achieve aspects of the "ideal women" that were natural for someone (fake tan, when some people tan naturally; perms, when some people have naturally curly hair; diets, when some people are naturally slim; etc) - nowadays it feels like what are supposed to look like is natural for no one.

No pubes - few if any adults are naturally like this

Skinny with massive boobs - same

Tiny waist, huge arse, a la Kardashian - same

Artificially coloured hair - especially if you are mousy. Very few natural hair colours are considered to be really stylish nowadays

For men (young men anyway) - it isn't enough to be athletic and strong, you also, really, ought to be "ripped", which means a special diet and exercise regime to result in big muscles and very little body fat - not just normal fitness. (hence the idea of "dad bod" as a "thing" - as opposed to "normal bod" which is now visible muscles and no body fat?)

Now I expect lots of people to pile on and say "YOU ARE WRONG EVERYONE IS A FATTEY NOW IN THE PAST EVERYONE LOOKED LIKE IGGY POP AND DAVID BOWIE IT IS NATURAL" - but if that was the case why were Iggy Pop and David Bowie so widely adored and strange and unnatural and unusual?

"I don't want to go to the beach / swimming pool and see anyones pubes hanging out"

But you don't mind seeing hair on heads? Beards?

My mum is 61 this year. I asked her. She removed her pubic hair back in the early-mis 70s. She did so because her mum and aunts did and were quite open about it (my mums mum would be 90 if she still were alive). Mum still does today, though I have no idea to what extent she removes it to. She says in her circle of friends it was very common.

So some women didn't and some women did. Same as today. I wonder if it has only become a 'thing' because it's more out there and you can pay someone else to do it for you. May be some people feel they need to try it, like I felt the need to try nail extensions even though I am not that fussed about my nails.

Thank you, God, for not making me one of those people who are offended by the sight of hair. Amen.

yet we all shave our armpits. Or the majority. Why is that ok but other shaving isn't. Just because that's always been how you've known it?

Nobody said saving your pubes isn't ok. No-one. Some people who remove it all complained about people being negative about t, when no-one on this thread was negative about it.
Total straw man.

Surely a garden needs some sort of shrubbery I used to shave it all off. Now I give it the occasional trim to neaten it up... maybe once a month. These days I'm more concerned about the hair tha started growing on my chin. ThT take daily dedication

Tht = those....

Personally I wax the lot off when I can, I'm quit a sweaty person and find it all really uncomfortable

I shave my legs and armpits because society tells me that's what I ought to do. I'm not proud of that. I wish I was brave enough not to care. But my legs and armpits are on display- so "society" can judge me on a regular basis. The same can not be said of my pubic hair- which is seen by my partner, my doctor and my close women friends-who are the same age as me and have pubic hair too.

One of the things I've noticed of late is that there is a huge growth in "shaming" culture. T'Internet is stuffed with body shape "shaming" and here with pubes and womens pubes in particular there is a growth in spider leg shaming. It's annoying that this kind of thing messes with people heads, unfairly. I guess in part it's media driven as around this time of year it "beach body" time and that shifts magazines and products. Don't get me wrong as I think pron play a huge part in the visible labia thing. So there are two drivers for de-fuzz argument. Men's perception of womens bodies from pornography. And a whole industry that plays on "insecurities" telling women they should look a certain way. Here we see an intersection between two money making scams that drives all this.

Of course it is a straw man: "how dare you say that thing no-one said!" what else do you call it?

I don't want to go to the beach / swimming pool and see anyone's pubes hanging out.
IMO pubic/bum hair is part of the genital regions and as such should not be on public display, I do not see it as comparable to chin hair or beards. Like-wise I do not want to see a builders bottom crack when they bend over. If someone wants to wander around naked, do it in the privacy of your own home, or a naturists area. If that makes me a prude then I am a prude.

But it isnt being naked, is it? If you think bikinis are too skimpy thats one thing, but if you are objecting to a glimpse of hair rather than skin, that makes no sense at all.

Hodooooooooor, by that logic then you would be ok with seeing mens junk hanging out.

No. Because penises and hair are not the same thing. Although I'm not that fucked really, I have this magical skill where I can look at something else instead. You might try and acquire the same.

Itsmine- why do you join threads like this when you don't actually want to discuss things- you just want to shut other people up?

Secondly people shouldn't say it makes them feel less sweaty because that is factually incorrect

Could you try reading? For the thousandth time I said "It might make you FEEL less sweaty, it does not have any effect on how much you actually sweat".
Perception vs biology.

I couldn't care less if you grew it to your knees, tied it in a bow and added handmade beads. OR shaved your pubes, legs, eyebrows and waxed the words fuck off on the back of your head.
None of my business.