'We're' pregnant

[RainbowsAndUnicorns5]

Obviously I'm an awful person aibu to bristle whenever someone says this?

YANBU. Makes my teeth itch.

It's horrible!

It was really important to me that dh was seen as being equally part of things, so I consciously said "we're expecting" or "we're having a baby" when we were talking about our child.

Anything to do with the pregnancy itself was clearly not equally experienced by both of us! My body, my pregnancy.

"We're pregnant" just removes your identity as an individual. Like how people think its fine to touch your bump without asking. If I went round rubbing the stomachs of all the people who tried to touch me when I was pregnant, I'd be done for assault. Grrr!

True paulankathedog if the pregnant woman says it then whilst it would still make me eye roll, because it's grammatically and scientifically incorrect, I wouldn't find it as cringe worthy and maddening as I do when it comes from the partners mouth!

Its just inaccurate, so you can say it if you want but it sounds stupid because it doesn't make sense.
It IS a one person event. Only one half of the couple is pregnant.

Nope, YANBU.

'We're' not vomming our guts out for 12 weeks.
'We're' not watching our fingers and toes inflate as the weeks go by.
'We're' not farting and crying like there's no tomorrow.
'We're' not getting a baby cut out of us in 4 months time.

WE are definitely not pregnant.

*disclaimer: pregnant and hormonal

No, I think it is offensive.

Only women can be pregnant.

That matters and should be acknowledged.

I don't have to like it if there are women who doffer or say things are are twee and wrong and dismissive of women and their biological reality.

DH and I have our period at the moment, so perhaps we're a bit cranky.

I actually had my mind changed on this one

DH watches lots of US TV and I think he's influenced by it. He used to joke around saying "When we're pregnant can I do XYZ?"

It really drove me mad because I'd say, no, we won't be pregnant, I will be pregnant. He got really sad about the fact I wouldn't let him say it. I said I was totally happy for him to say we're expecting, we're having a baby etc but not we're pregnant because it's factually incorrect.

I live abroad so a lot of my English speaking friends are American. I mentioned this annoyance to a few of them expecting them to react like MNers and agree but instead they all made :( :( faces and one who I really respect ended up persuading me to let it slide because it was such a common thing to say and just an expression. It still irritated me, but I told DH my friends had deemed me unreasonable and that he could say it. But I'd prefer "we're expecting". Because it's accurate.

Then I got pregnant, and I miscarried at six weeks. Throughout the whole affair he was so involved, invested and basically acting more pregnant than me that I suddenly got it! It might just be the contrast to my ex, who was happy to ignore it unless it was exciting for him in the moment, it might be DH being weirdly involved (he was the one having weird cravings, morning nausea, and mysterious metallic tastes whereas I had none of that) but I conceded that, yes, he was enough of a part of proceedings that I'd reluctantly admit that he could claim some kind of ownership of the process.

It was weird. But yes, it doesn't creep me out as much any more.

You should do it Nick. Might make some people realise how astonishingly inappropriate it is to go round grabbing at someone else's abdomen. I always boggle that anyone thinks this is ok. I'd slap their hand on instinct.

Luckily DH and I had our family before all this 'we're pregnant' nonsense. He would have told his friends "Across is pregnant", "I'm going to be a father", or "We're having a baby". 'We' may very well have been having a baby, but only I was actually pregnant, thank you very much. I did the majority of the work and I want all the credit for it,

I think this 'we're pregnant' deal started as a way to make the fathers feel more involved in the biological process. All well and good, but somehow it almost seems to, I don't know, seem to me as if the man is usurping his partner's role. 'We' aren't having morning sickness. 'We' aren't dealing with the myriad discomforts. And 'we' certainly aren't experiencing labour. So don't make it sound as if 'you' are.

Bertie that sounds terribly attention seeking.......why would someone claim to be feeling all sorts of impossible things like that.....or have I misunderstood?

Oh, btw, I'm American.

If it's OK to say "we're pregnant" then it ought to be perfectly logical for the father to say "I'm pregnant" from time to time - but no man ever does. Just as, for instance, you might say "we're on holiday" if you're together, but "I'm on holiday" if you meet someone when you're on your own.

Bertie, did you DH tell people that he'd miscarried?

I'm currently 34wks with DC2 and I can categorically state there is no 'we' about it. DH has no heartburn, vomiting, restless legs, constant trips to the loo, leaking nipples, or joint pain and his pelvic floor is in tact. If he tried to suggest to anyone that 'we' were pregnant I would likely be giving birth in police custody. In my first pregnancy he had the cheek to complain to a mutual friend that he was exhausted as he was being woken by my pregnancy snoring. Yes, I'm sure it's loud and less than pleasant, but hardly comparable (I was up 5 times last night and restless for another good portion of the night). He hasn't been daft enough to say it again.

My ex was particularly fond of say this and it irritated the hell out of me!

YANBU

I hate it. YANBU.

I'm pregnant. We're having a baby. And in ds's words "Mummy is growing a new baby" (like it will replace the old one!)

Yanbu op.

Definitions
adjective

1. carrying a fetus or fetuses within the womb
2. full of meaning or significance

inventive or imaginative

1. prolific or fruitful

Men, simple put, don't carry a fetus in their womb.

It annoys the bezeezus out of me.

YANBU - it's so cringe! Yuck yuck yuck

"We're having a baby" Yes
"We're pregnant" No hmm

^ this, a thousand times this

Cannot STAND it. It's probably the one thing I hate most in the world.

Twee, irritating, incorrect and dismisses the hard work and actual risks undertaken by the woman.

YANBU it's vom-inducing.

The only two men I've heard saying this out loud in public each turned out to be controlling/emotionally abusive arse holes who mistreated their wives (and in one case children) so yes, I also find it creepy and weird. It's like the woman has no body autonomy or individuality now "they" are pregnant. Ugh.

Hate it, cringe! I would've loved to share the "joy" but failing that, got to take the credit.