How do you decide between private school or state school?

[Hecegoza]

I'm so torn... There's a lovely prep school, relatively close (15 min drive) and it only has 123 students - from age 1-11. I'd want mine to start at Pre-Reception.

It's very family-like and has great pastoral care (which I think is more important than results, for sure).

It's reasonable price - it's £21 a morning session for Pre-Reception and then £2,900 each term up to Year 6. That includes lunch/swimming, etc.

Then there's an 'Outstanding' state school which is walking distance, it's a lovely newly built building. Then friends he met at school would most likely be in his village too... So that's a bonus, and most likely to go to the same secondary.

I'm struggling to decide if your kids go private, why is that? If state, why did you pick that? I feel they both have good benefits!

For KS1 I think children do as well in state primaries. It's only when they get to eight or older that they might like to do all the other stuff.

I was impressed with our village primary. My two went in to the private system at ten, and have done as least as well at GCSE as those who had always gone private.

I'm sorry lurked but there isn't lots if evidence of that.

But even if it were true. What does that tell us other than private schools are doing an excellent job of helping as many if their students as possible attain good grades and aiming high in their destinations of choice.

It tells us that sometimes these grades are not a true reflection of ability.

Thanks arethere... there is research from both the Sutton trust and from the government when it looked into inequality.

Like I said, don't mind people doing well. But you need to admit that you bought some.of the privileges that helped attain the success. That's all the difference is between private and public sector, the quality is not in the teaching but the time the teacher is afforded, not in the ability of the child but the resources that they can access. It's buying the advantages, not merit based.

lurked as I say, the devil is in the detail.

As for paying for privilege, well yes of course that's what I have done. My children are utterly privileged to have received the education they have. And it's been my privilege to pay for it.

Whether their public exam grades would have been any different, I can't say. But that's not the point of it.

That said, both my DC are pretty bright but more importantly they work their bums off.

We didn't pay a cheque and get their grades in the post .

I know and I totally don't mind people paying for it. I do mind the inferencesmade on here though.

It doesn't seem surprising that students from state schools do better at university than students from private schools with the same grades at A level. IME when I went to university from a comprehensive, to get good grades at A level was hard, and required good study skills, independent learning to find resources etc, which stood us in good stead later. Suspect there were state students who got lower grades at A level than they might have done with more advantages.

Arethereany -
"I worked in hr for a while - if we received a cv with 4 As from an applicant from a public school, we would treat this with a pinch of salt, meaningless, and gave no insight in to the intelligence of the applicant."
Is that code for "we don't like privately educated people and we don't want to employ you"?

Cheeky git.
"Is this what Mao was trying to do when he stripped back society so No ONE could be other to someone else? ( except of course him and his cronies)"
Yes, that's so true. Now there are the children of high ranking Chinese communist officials with pseudonyms at UK public school . So hypocritical!

Arethereany - sorry, I posted my comment before I read your reply to two other posters.

Dapple - nope, code for 'we have absolutely no idea if you're intelligent or not.'

Whoops - I posted my reply before I read your last paragraph.

There was a very sad thread on MN a while ago where the OP was having to take her DD out of her excellent private school just as she was about to sit GCSEs. The family had simply run out of money and all available lines of credit including with the school were exhausted. Private schools are businesses. If the money stops, the school place is lost.

This was our biggest concern. Unless I had the money for school fees in the bank I wouldnt entertain the idea of private school. Having experienced sudden redundancy I know that there are few certainties in the world of employment.

"Is that code for "we don't like privately educated people and we don't want to employ you"?

Or is it that they attempt to 'control' for privilege in assessing ability and potential?

Very maximum is 13 per class.

Which seems like a great idea when your kids are small, but it ends up that they have no friends choice and are stuck with the same few people.

"As for paying for privilege, well yes of course that's what I have done. My children are utterly privileged to have received the education they have"

Yes - in metaphorical terms you have given them a massive pair of hobnail boots which they can wear to trample over the backs of poorer children in their rush for life's rewards. Well done!

Yes, paying for privilege will give them a head start but they also need to be able to survive and come up with the goods, to get anywhere in life.
waste of time your parents spending thousands on an education for you to be a top Lawyer or Politician and you being a bit shit and getting sacked in your first job.

Very late to the thread and haven't read it all, but IME lurked is right. We did consider "going private" at both 8 and 11, but have stuck with the state system (I was state educated she went to a public school). Ds is now at a super selective grammar which far outperforms its state competitors a and they are no slouch at sport and performing arts either. We are now wobbling with dd aged 9 who is very bright and very bored in a mixed year group class of 34 in the "cute" village primary.

Dh went to public school!!

"you being a bit shit and getting sacked in your first job."

You mean like Boris Johnson?

Thing is Charely all that is lovely, but it does sort of prepare you for a life a privilege. I think that state educated graduates are tougher and harder working than those who have been handed it on a plate ( I am still struggling with some of these attitudes from Dh 25 years on).

lurked

Exactly, with all the privileges you can buy, it's a waste of time if you can't come up with the goods, money means nothing then.

!"at my guess probably at least £6k per year per child "

Way more.