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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to think that guests should receive a meal at a wedding

406 replies

Roversandrhodes · 06/05/2016 14:52

Oh and I recently attended the wedding of good old friends of mine ,oh has met them a handful of times.
Wedding was at 12 and night guests arrived at 7.After the ceremony we were shown to a room for a 'mingle' whilst the wedding party had their photos.We were then taken to our assigned tables and sat down to a scone and jam.This was it ,all day.

Until about 9pm when a burger van arrived .

Aibu to think this was a little rude ?Some guests had travelled from Germany and Scotland to be there ,it was Friday so many guests inc myself and oh had taken time off work ,no kids were aloud so we (and many other guests had arranged childcare) ,we travelled an hour to get there ,brought a gift ,etc.I don't resent doing any of this ,I was happy to be invited but I just think it's a little unreasonable to expect guests to go from morning til 8pm on one scone each and a spoonful of jam.

Thoughts ?

OP posts:

MiddleClassProblem · 07/05/2016 13:30

Oh no. I did go to a wedding where they just had photos of B&G on the walls which was a nice touch. If a photo is in a speech in must be of comedic value

Floggingmolly · 07/05/2016 13:32

Did they expect you to buy copies of their wedding photos, MrsJ?

MrsJayy · 07/05/2016 13:33

Tbh that wedding seemed to last longer thanthe marraige wasover 6 months later

MiddleClassProblem · 07/05/2016 13:35

But at least they have the photos, MrsJayy

MomofBride · 07/05/2016 13:36

That is so crap and rude to bugger off for hours having photos and ignoring your invited guests. A few nice pics of the two of you yes, but the best ones are always of people having a good time anyway. I blame celeb culture again though, all show.

MrsJayy · 07/05/2016 13:37

Aye all 200 of them

Original poster

Roversandrhodes · 07/05/2016 13:40

Was anyone else asked to sing ?acapella ,to a pop song ?as b and g walked back up the aisle after the ceremony ?there were no 'hired'singers just us Admittedly I've only been to about 5 weddings so unsure if this is a done thing .Wedding wasn't in a church btw .

OP posts:

MiddleClassProblem · 07/05/2016 13:43

Oh yeah, Rovers, all the time!
"I'm loving Angels insteeeead"

No, been to more than 20 weddings and not once have I been the backing for the bride's aisle walk. What was the song?

Original poster

Roversandrhodes · 07/05/2016 13:45

I don't want to give myself away on here but I think I may have been to the only wedding in the country where guests were fed a scone over a period of 12hrs (soz burger van too) so it may be a giveaway to any other guests reading

OP posts:

Original poster

Roversandrhodes · 07/05/2016 13:47

hintIt was from a film and the title is the same title as the film ,3 words

OP posts:

Bogeyface · 07/05/2016 14:11

Carry on Regardless?! :o

expatinscotland · 07/05/2016 14:14

'Give me warm sausage rolls and curled up chicken paste sandwiches over a "sweetie buffet" any day. '

Same. I don't like sweets at all.

And it was probably all scoffed because there was no other food available.

Original poster

Roversandrhodes · 07/05/2016 14:19

Nope ha ha

OP posts:

dailyfailrag · 07/05/2016 14:21

Wedding photo time is tedious. I much prefer the candid style shots that pics of a load of bored, baking hot wedding guests standing next to a gazebo.

My DM was invited to a wedding of an ex-colleague she hadn't seen in years. It was huge, about 400 guests, and piles of gifts. Apparently in the run up they had also had stag and hen weekends and a bridal shower (no idea what that is, basically a present grab I think) which she didn't attend. About 3 months after the wedding she was invited to a 'photo viewing party' at their house. Gifts optional, bring a bottle. She turns up and it's one of those jewellery selling parties! They did pass photos around (much to the anger of the jewellery selling rep) and she feigned interested before buggering off rather quickly. DM then conveniently forgot to send a change of address card to the couple when she moved.

targaryen · 07/05/2016 14:24

We went to an afternoon wedding of a friend.
She had said to bring children so we brought our three.
The children had had lunch and a snack and we thought they would be ok til evening buffet.
We got to evening do for 7pm and kids started saying they were really hungry. Asked at the bar what time evening buffet would be served and told 10pm !
Asked for some crisps and nuts but didn't sell any.
My husband went to find a shop and brought back some crisps, were devoured instantly.
We managed to last til the first dance and cutting of the cake and then left to take kids to McDonalds and didn't go back.
This was last summer and my friend still hasn't spoke to me

expatinscotland · 07/05/2016 14:33

How old are your kids? I wouldn't take mine to an evening do and they are 10 and 7, mainly because, well, I wouldn't expect much food at one and what food there was I'd expect to be served pretty late. Definitely not at the start of the do.

Your husband just brought back crisps? Not a sandwich or pepperami or cheese and crackers?

Rdoo · 07/05/2016 14:36

targaryen I think you were the unreasonable one in that situation.

CharlieSierra · 07/05/2016 14:37

targaryen did you go to the afternoon or the evening?

If you didn't arrive until 7 you would have expected to miss the wedding meal surely? Even at a decent wedding you then wouldn't expect evening food until much later, so why wouldn't you feed your children at tea time as normal? If you went to the afternoon, what happened to the wedding breakfast, no food at all until 10?

expatinscotland · 07/05/2016 14:46

Even by 7, I'd expect to have fed my kids dinner by then. Rather cheeky to think there will be dinner at 7pm when it's an evening do.

BackforGood · 07/05/2016 14:58

Was anyone else asked to sing ?acapella ,to a pop song ?as b and g walked back up the aisle after the ceremony ?there were no 'hired'singers just us confused Admittedly I've only been to about 5 weddings so unsure if this is a done thing .Wedding wasn't in a church btw

Er no. I've been to dozens (probably into hundred +) weddings over the years. I've even sung in a (Church) choir at many, and it's not usual to sing whilst they are walking back down the aisle, even if you are in the choir. I've NEVER heard of the congregation being asked to 'sing them down the aisle'. Only singing normally is either hymns, or a performance by someone previously asked to do so.

MiddleClassProblem · 07/05/2016 15:06

I can't think of the bloody film!

targaryen · 07/05/2016 15:08

It was an afternoon/evening wedding, so started at 4pm, wedding at 5pm, photos til 6ish then a drive over town to reception for 6:30-7pm.
The only reason I took my kids was because friend said hers were going who are all similar ages to mine so I assumed she would be catering for her own children too.

I probably should of took a bag of food for them especially knowing my son is a food monster.

It was all a bit of a shambles to be honest and in a way we were happy to leg it.

Bride and groom had both got hammered the night before and still pretty wrecked the next day.

MiddleClassProblem · 07/05/2016 15:09

All I've got are James Bond songs

MiddleClassProblem · 07/05/2016 15:10

How awful for her not talking to you because you didn't stay on! You went, you saw all the main bits, you maybe even gave a gift. What a dick.

targaryen · 07/05/2016 15:13

Probably shouldn't have sent DH to get provisions as he feels crisps are an acceptable food source for all meals. Should have went myself or given him a list

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